Black Angus Consolidated
Black Angus World Domination HQ


What is Black Angus?


Black Angus is the thing that goes bump in the night, the thing your mother warned you about, the most unholiest of unholies, and your lord and master. Repent and submit now before the go-gun revolution of beef claims you as it's nightly feast. Wherever there is mayhem and chaos, Black Angus is laughing maniacally in the shadows; plotting, planning, and populating this toilet earth with it's minions of carnivorous persuasion. Take heed, take heed yon lusty tupperware, for Black Angus will descend upon you and ravish you like a rack of ribs, then cast your remains off like the bones in a hefty bag. Love Us. Fear Us. Accept us as your only Saviours into the next millenium of vegetarian liquidation.


cows are yummy







Who is Black Angus?
The Overlords:
David Farmer Ed Zygot Jenkins - Da Jenkchain. Master of disaster. The Celtic Madman. Devourer of Bushmills and Guinness. Destroyer of Gin and Tonics. Former cofounder of the abberation that was the Epileptic Caesars before seeing the Mighty Black Angus' true glory. Osirified Warrior and Artist. Keeper of Hidden Secrets. Proud bearer of the Freak-Flag.

Kurt Otto Z Obskure Smith - The mighty Smith and Wesson. Grus Ubermensch of Funk and Smooveness. The Krautian Terror. Subjugator of Porterhouses and Freaky Philadelphians. Other cofounder of the Epileptic Caesars from whence Black Angus was spawned. Laureate Poet and Bad Muhfukkah. Gleaner of Hidden Truths. Impressario o' Bad News. The Rocks Master.

Mark "Get the Hell out of My Kool-Aid" Smith. - This almost brings a tear to my eye to see Mark Graduate into the upper eschalon of Angushood, this has been one of my best bro's for a long time. I met him at Rocky Horror Picture Show close 6 years ago, and the jankin' has yet to stop. Keeper of the Gates of Hell. Closet HairBand Fanatic. Owner of The Dog. Controller of the Airwaves. Full-fledged Fuck-upper of Country Fried Steak. Minister of Art for BAC.

Paul "Fenian O'Connell" Ryan - But don't take our word for it ... read it in his own words...":I have espoused the Most High Tenants of Carnivorous Existance since my birth, not once deviating from even the most trivial of the Commandments of Angus. While others might say that "A salad is fine for lunch sometimes" I can only sit and laugh at the fools (and phools they be!) who actually believe that the non-intelligent, sedentary, cholorphyll-laden, vegetables they eat will keep them from become ones themselves." Paul has also had the misfortune of experiences even too vile to list in this publication *shiver*, you *don't want to know. Provider of Cloves. Wearer of Shirts Frilly.

Daryl "SAS" Strahan - Info Forthcomning

Kevin "Solo" Spooner - Info Forthcoming

Mike "Jewboy" Burkhardt - Info Forthcoming



And now proudly presenting Black Angus' new Ministry of Arts and Culture -- MAD COW THEATRICS!!!

Mad Cow Theatrics

MCT will soon have its own page with coming events, schedules, and info on the staff.
Some more Raw Red Meat

Do you hate vegetarians too?


Here are a few things you might want to look at. These all get the Black Angus Stamp of Approval


People Eating Tasty Animals (PETA)
A why vegetarians are silly page
Why vegetarians are Tossers
Adopt a Vegetarian
My favorite Vegetarian Recipe

Is your site 100 percent RAW? Email me your url, name, email, and a brief site description and I'll review your site. Winners will be notified via email. No purchase necessary. Void where prohibited. Some assembly required. Do not expose to heat or sunlight. Viewer discretion advised.


Black Angus' Favorite Steak Sauce


McWorter's Original Condiment

Ingredients: Water, Blackstrap Molasses, Imported Habenero Peppers, Salt, Garlic, Ginger, Tomato Puree, Axle Grease, Real Hickory Smoke, Snuff, Butts of Clove Cigarretes, Guinness Stout Fermentation Dregs, Uranium Mill Tailings, Muffler Cores, Monosodium Glutamate, Nitrates, Nitrites, Nitrotes and Nitrutes, Natrotes, Powdered Pork Nose Hairs, Dynamite, Activated Charcoal, Match Heads, Used Pipe Cleaners, Tar, Nicotine, Single Malt Whiskey, Smoked Beef Lymph Nodes, Autumn Leaves, Red Fuming Nitric Acid, Bituminous Coal, Fallout, Printers Ink, Laundry Starch, Drain Cleaner, Blue Chrysotile Asbestos, Carrageenan, BHA, BHT, and Natural Flavorings.
- Care of Neal Stephenson

Wanna be a cool poet?


Do you value your petty existance? JOIN BLACK ANGUS NOW!
How do we do that you whine? Email Angus ... we'll be the judge.

Return
lucky bastards have grazed here.
Copyright 1998 Black Angus Consolidated
Authored and Maintained by David M. Jenkins
[email protected]
Last updated 19 August 1998
Hosted by www.Geocities.ws

1