Lee Hom's " Forever 1st Day " Album Diary

89/09/02~89/09/08 @ Part 13

Dear Friends,

To be happy. I think this is the most important and most difficult task of a human being. I'm not talking about the eating MacDonald's cookies and cream ice cream happy, or buying a new pair of Prada shoes happy. I'm talking about the kind of happy when you can say to yourself."I am truly a happy person, there is nothing more I'll ever need." It comes from within, that much I know, and few people are lucky enough to be blessed with it.

The greatest day of my life was June, 5 1998. I had just graduated from college, and signed a new record deal with Sony. The whole world was before me, and if this wasn't enough to put me in good spirits, on top of it all, it was my big brother's wedding day. My brother Leo and I are the best of friends. Having grown up together, I can honestly say I have spent more time with him than anyone else in the world. Even so, we only understand each other well enough to know that we are very different people. He has always been a scientist, and I have always been musician. And although the quests of scientists and musicians may be one in the same, we have different basic beliefs and methods of finding answers.

A year previously when Leo called me up in my dorm and said, "Lee-hom, I just proposed to Stacy", I was in a state of panic. I thought he had done something rash, perhaps getting engaged was in some twisted way an act of rebellion.that would be more like him. I told him he was probably working too hard in the lab, and needed a vacation. "Take it easy, be careful" I said, "let's not do anything we might regret". I basically said to him everything that I might say to a man pointing a gun in my direction. His indefensible rebuttal was, "I honestly can't imagine being happier with another person". I couldn't argue with that. At that time, I cursed under my breath, for I knew Leo was using his finely tuned debating skills on me. His uncanny ability to win arguments had won him so many competitions in the past. However, on June 5th, I became convinced that what he said was true.

On this day, I saw Leo in almost unrecognizable form. Standing next to his fiance Stacy, he was happier and prouder than I'd ever seen him in his life. Much happier than at his college or high school graduations, or any birthday or Christmas. Happier than when he'd beat me in chess or a video game. His happiness that day was indefensible. There was no, "let's have a rematch", or "best out of three". He knew he was about to win a bigger game.

As the day progressed, I watched my brother turn from a bachelor to a married man. This transformation made a huge impression on me. Though only two and a half years older than me, my brother knew what he wanted in life, and was happy. His words, "I honestly can't imagine being happier with another person" echoed in my head throughout the day, and I was knew that I was witnessing the greatest miracle in life: love. I write about it all the time in my songs, and I believe strongly in its power. However, to possess it in one's own life.that is a rare gift.

In my studies as a musician, I have come to realize that there is some connection between love and happiness.but I can't tell you exactly what the relationship is. Nor have I heard of a scientific way to create either of the two. If I ever find out, I'll be sure to let you know. But in the meantime, I'll keep looking for answers in my own ways,through music.

May you find inner happiness this Mid-Autumn Festival,
Homeboy