This Is The REAL Story Behind Innocent Dorothy And OZ


A quick summary:

A girl is transported to a strange land. On arrival she immediately kills an old lady and steals her shoes. She then sets off with three total strangers on a quest to kill another one.

The particulars:

It starts like this-- a girl named Dorothy hates her dull farm life so much that she takes off with the family dog in search of adventure. In the process, she's magically transported to a strange land where she immediately kills an old lady and steals her shoes.

At the urging of a horde of demented singing midgets and a flying pink piece of lace, she sets off in search of a cultish guru who, the midgets say, will make all of her dreams come true. Along the way she picks up three strangers with promises of rich rewards from this mysterious guru figure. The first, "Scarecrow" is a comic simpleton incapable of even simple reasoning but who manages to get by based on his considerable dancing skill. The second, "Tin Man", is the laziest loser in the world; he hasn't worked in YEARS, and in fact has literally not moved from the spot where he sits in all that time, but he claims it's due to a questionable medical condition. The third, "Lion", is the classic insecure bully; he makes a big show of trying to scare the others, but then crumples and starts wimpering at the first sign of resistance. It's a strange group, this menage a quatre, so perhaps their adventures shouldn't seem surprising.

While en route, our band of pilgrims is repeatedly attacked by a second old lady, who lives alone in a remote castle with only pet monkeys for companions. She sets Scarecrow on fire, but the others manage to extinguish the blaze with only minor injuries. Later, the old lady breaks out her prescription drugs and gets the group so stoned that they all pass out, and remain catatonic until it starts snowing on them. But they're still extremely stoned, and stumble through bizarre visions; like a whole city where everything is green, and a horse that changes color every few seconds. They have a group hallucination that the Lion is actually a king, and Scarecrow imagines that friendly pixies have ripped out his guts and replaced them with a fresh set. Finally they encounter a disembodied floating head, which they take to be the cult master. But the master refuses to make their dreams come true unless they first rob the old lady's castle and give him the loot.

So they head for the castle. But the old lady proves to be a fighter. She doesn't give up easily, and manages to temporarily imprison the still-stoned Dorothy with vague threats of doom. Tin Man vandalizes the castle with an axe. Finally Dorothy can take no more; she's determined to do what she imagines to be the cult leader's bidding, no matter the cost, and having killed before, she kills again. And Dorothy's a cruel bitch about it; no painless deaths here, she pours a bucket of acid on the old lady and literally melts her body away to nothing, and Dorothy watches sadistically while the old lady screams in agony. Dorothy tries to cover her tracks by innocently blinking her eyelashes and claiming that she thought the bucket had been filled with water, but nobody is fooled.

Returning to the cult compound, they present the leader with the stolen goods. About this time, the opium high finally wears off and Dorothy and company finally see "Oz" for what he is: a fat, middle aged white guy leading on his dupes with baseless threats and meaningless promises combined with a killer stereo system. But he claims that he really can make their dreams come true, though all he can manage are a few cheap trinketsand some trite platitudes.

Dorothy's crew seems content to live the lie, but not Dorothy. She insists that he take her home, and he finally agrees to give her a ride, but then takes off alone leaving her high and dry. The flying pink piece of lace reappears, and speaks to Dorothy, giving her a line about magic shoes and such, and the weird thing is that Dorothy actually believes it.

And then... the director cops out and we learn that the whole thing has been a dream....

All in all, it's sort of a precursor to Quinten Tarantino films.

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