The Dance

by Kath Tate

Disclaimer: Star Wars and its characters are the property of Lucasfilm Ltd and Twentieth Century Fox. This story does not mean to infringe upon the trademarks or copyrights.

Kath's Notes:  Many many thanks to Lori for her proofing skills! =)

*****

Obi-Wan watched the dancers from the mezzanine with admiration. He had a perfect view of the dance floor and his position allowed him to appreciate the beauty of the coordinated movement. He wished, and not for the first time, that all assignments could end on such a jubilant note. It seemed only just to reward hard labour with a little celebrating.

With a grin he turned to Qui-Gon to observe his master's reaction. But Qui-Gon appeared distracted, not watching the dancing at all. Obi-Wan's grin faded slowly. Qui-Gon never did enjoy parties very much and this was the fourth night of festivities.

They had come to the colony of Valinass to oversee the ratification of a treaty between the colonists and their homeworld, Galen. For nearly one hundred years the colonists and the homeworlders had been at odds, sometimes violently so. That they were now willing to work together in harmony was truly cause for celebration.

Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon had accompanied delegates from the homeworld and their duties included escorting them back to Galen. For this Obi-Wan was grateful, as it meant sharing in the festivities. Otherwise he was sure Qui-Gon would have found some excuse for them to leave four days ago.

Obi-Wan knew Qui-Gon was concerned about the way things had gone. Even though the treaty, with fair and just terms, had been agreed to, signed and witnessed, his master was troubled. Obi-Wan knew why. He also had sensed something not quite sincere about the demeanor of the homeworld delegation.

However, Qui-Gon's suspicions had not borne fruit. From everyone's point of view the treaty was the beginning of a more prosperous and peaceful chapter in the colony's history.

"Are you enjoying yourselves, my Jedi friends?" Sazi, a delegate of small size and sharp wit, came to stand between them. Qui-Gon acknowledged her with a nod but Obi-Wan was vocal.

"Very much," he told her with a smile.

"Them come dance with me," she invited him, pulling on his arm.

"Oh...no..." Obi-Wan tried to protest. "I don't know how."

She continued to pull him towards the stairs, unconcerned by his reluctance.

"I can easily teach it to you. It's a very simple step."

Obi-Wan cast a look over his shoulder at Qui-Gon but received no help from that corner. Resigned he followed Sazi to the dance floor. She told him how to stand and then pressed her palms against his.

"Just follow me," she murmured, showing him some steps. After a few moments Obi-Wan felt confident enough to stop watching his feet and look her in the eyes. She was staring at him so frankly he averted his gaze to the other dancers.

"You see? It's not so difficult. I can't believe that the Jedi don't teach you to dance. You have such graceful movements it's a pity to waste them."

In the time they'd spent together Sazi had proven to be extremely curious about Jedi customs and practices. Her curiosity had not been satisfied by any details given by either Qui-Gon, who had all but ignored her, or Obi-Wan, who had proven surprisingly evasive. Not that Sazi was going to give up. She was as persistent as she was curious.

Just prior to landing on Valinass she'd grilled Obi-Wan about the roles and responsibilities of a Jedi. When he'd told her that the Jedi defended those who could not defend themselves she'd become very thoughtful.

"I wonder who on Valinass is defenseless, the colonists or the homeworlders?" Sazi had murmured. Obi-Wan had stared at her with a perplexed look.

"No one. That is not our purpose here."

"Or so you believe, young Jedi," Sazi had said, proving that she could be equally as cryptic.

"I bet you don't get too many festivals like this on Coruscant," she commented now, drawing his attention back.

Obi-Wan smiled.

"No, not many," he agreed. Then he gave a slight shrug. "No time."

"Ah, but that's where you're wrong!" Sazi laughed. "There's nothing more important. Live for the moment." Her eyes glanced up towards the mezzanine level as Obi-Wan turned her around. "Now back to the left," she instructed. "I bet your master wouldn't agree with me," she added casually.

Obi-Wan laughed at her not very veiled attempt to pry into the Jedi's lives.

"Just because he doesn't like celebrations doesn't mean he can't appreciate their value."

Sazi shook her head sadly.

"Value? See, your attitude is all wrong. Have you been to the others?" When Obi-Wan nodded she asked, "And which one did you enjoy the most?"

"The dancing," Obi-Wan answered promptly. Sazi laughed delightedly. He'd practically winked at her.

"So tonight has the most value then?"

Obi-Wan thought about the past three nights. There had been a grand parade, a festival of lights, and a musical extravaganza.

"Each was equally important for different purposes," he answered seriously. "Your culture greatly admires the display of grand emotional exchanges and..."

"Don't," she interrupted, "give me a lecture on my culture. Now to the right and back again."

They lapsed into silence while moving to the music. Obi-Wan was sorry, thinking he'd somehow offended her. She seemed quite sad.

"How long have you been an apprentice?" she asked abruptly.

'Back to that again,' thought Obi-Wan with amusement.

"About eleven years now," he answered.

Encouraged by the straightforward response she continued.

"How long does it take to become a knight?"

"As long as it takes," Obi-Wan replied seriously but with a twinkle in his eyes.

"Oh come on! Do they teach you evasive maneuvers or does it just come naturally?" she burst out. "Turn twice," she added more calmly.

After completing the move Obi-Wan faced her once again, palms pressed to hers.

"It takes as many years as Qui-Gon feels are necessary to prepare me," he told her.

Sazi glanced up at the Jedi master again.

"And you agree with that?" she asked, not hiding the amazement she felt. "Walk around me."

"I could spend a lifetime learning from Qui-Gon, so yes, I agree with it."

Sazi frowned, considering this.

"He's so cold, detached...remote. It's hard for me to see him able to teach anything when he's so devoid of passion," she observed.

Obi-Wan was so astonished at her inaccurate assessment of his master that he nearly stopped dancing. Fumbling a few steps he got back on track but remained silent. Sazi regarded him slyly.

"Am I wrong, Obi-Wan? As far as I can see he's shown few emotions in the last few weeks. He's not even enjoying himself now that the work is done."

Obi-Wan's eyes followed Sazi's up to his master who was engaged in conversation with another one of the homeworld delegates. Unfortunately Qui-Gon's expression was of polite interest. Obi-Wan looked back at Sazi to find her watching him intently again. Her probing was beginning to make him feel uncomfortable.

"Does he have any feelings, Obi-Wan?" she asked. "Because he looks like a very cold person."

"Looks can be deceiving," Obi-Wan told her softly, with a warning tone she chose to ignore.

"Do you know how he feels about you? Are you nearly a knight do you think? Stand there while I walk around you."

Obi-Wan waited until she'd completed her circuit and they were in the familiar palm to palm position once again before responding a bit coldly,

"I think you asked the wrong Jedi to dance. If you want to know how Master Qui-Gon feels, you should ask him."

Fearing she'd overstepped, Sazi steered them back to a more general topic.

"So, what happens when he decides you're ready? A celebration perhaps?" she teased. It worked; Obi-Wan smiled.

"No," he admitted. "The council sets a trial or series of trials for the padawan to face as a test of his worthiness."

"A final exam?" Sazi was surprised. "How anticlimactic. What happens if you fail?"

"I won't" was his short reply to that.

"No, I don't suppose you will," she agreed softly. "Left...no, left!"

Sazi was quiet for a few moments seeming lost in the dance. Obi-Wan wondered if there was some purpose behind her questions besides idle curiosity about the Jedi.

"After you become a Jedi knight, do you ever have to face trials again?" she asked somberly.

Obi-Wan took her hands to turn her in his arms.

"Life provides us many trials. You don't have to be a Jedi to face those kinds of challenges."

Was it his imagination or did she stiffen slightly at his words? Then Sazi stepped apart from Obi-Wan and bowed. He returned the bow as a measure of respect and to signal the end of the dance.

"I wonder what sorts of trials Master Qui-Gon faces," she murmured, taking his arm as he escorted her from the dance floor. Then she laughed, as though shedding her former serious mood. "You must forgive me Obi-Wan. It is a rare thing indeed for any of my people to meet a Jedi and you are the first in my experience."

He nodded acknowledgement of this and thanked her for the dance. She watched him leave with a smile that didn't reach her eyes.

*****

Later, Obi-Wan walked with Qui-Gon back to their rooms at the government house. He stifled a yawn, surprised at how tired he was.

"What did you think of the dancing?" Qui-Gon asked him.

"I think that the dance is very much like the Galen people," Obi-Wan answered after some thought.

"Really?" Qui-Gon was curious at this response. "How so?"

"Watching it from above, I thought it was very complicated. Then when Sazi showed me the steps I was surprised by their simplicity. Yet at the end, seeing how all the simple steps fit together I had a new appreciation for its complexity."

Qui-Gon smiled proudly at Obi-Wan and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"A very astute observation, padawan."

"Something else I thought was odd," Obi-Wan added after another yawn. "I sensed a kind of sorrow from Sazi that seemed out of place for the circumstances."

Qui-Gon's expression sobered.

"She, of all the delegates, resonates a feeling that all is not what it seems on Valinass."

*****

The following afternoon, Obi-Wan was trying hard to shield his exhaustion from his master. He hadn't had a particularly taxing day so he could only attribute his fatigue to the weeklong celebrations. Somehow he sensed Qui-Gon would disapprove. His master had avoided the second night altogether and managed to leave early on the third night. Obi-Wan had enjoyed them all to the very end.

Now, he had a slight headache and was in no mood for lectures.

They had spent the day outside of the city and Obi-Wan had to admit the terrain on Valinass was quite extraordinary. Also, it had been nice to get away from the crush of people in the colony's main settlement. Certainly, Qui-Gon seemed much more relaxed than he had been since their arrival.

"There's Ker," Qui-Gon observed as they entered the government house. "We should check with him about our transport back to Galen."

Obi-Wan lingered behind while Qui-Gon approached the city official. He didn't hear Qui-Gon's greeting but he did hear his reaction to Ker's response.

"Quarantine? What for?"

Obi-Wan moved swiftly to his master's side.

"There's been an outbreak of sickness in the city," Ker informed them sadly. "The medical advisors fear an epidemic."

"What kind of sickness?" Obi-Wan asked.

"That's the really frightening part. No one has been able to figure out what it is or how it is spreading. They are just treating symptoms for the moment. I was just instructed to go through the buildings to see if there are any people too sick to make it to the medical centre."

"I can help with that," Obi-Wan told him, forgetting his own fatigue with concern for this new situation.

"No," Qui-Gon said, surprising him. "You contact the medical centre to find out all the information they have on this disease and then contact the Jedi temple on Coruscant. They may be able to help with a cure. I'll go with Ker to find the others."

"Yes Master," Obi-Wan agreed, turning swiftly to find a communications console.

*****

Qui-Gon walked swiftly from the government house towards the medical centre. Dusk was falling and the gloom of the impending darkness matched his mood. In just two days the colony had changed from celebrating a bright future to wondering if there would be a future. The disease had ripped through the settlements like a wildfire and neither the medical droids nor the human healers had been able to come up with anything to stop the progression.

There could be only one conclusion to this tragedy. The potential death toll would be enormous.

Qui-Gon had just spent the afternoon going over all the data with several healers from Coruscant via an ever weakening communications link. The only theory that kept coming back to the forefront was that, due to the many generations apart, the homeworlders had inadvertently infected the colonists with a bug that was harmless on Galen. None of the delegation members had contracted the disease so far.

Qui-Gon didn't like that theory very much. Though he couldn't help but lend it credence by admitting he'd been suspicious of the delegation for no good reason. Just a vague sensation of insincerity.

Entering the medical centre Qui-Gon was struck at once by the overwhelming suffering of the ill. There were far too many patients for the facility and not enough care givers. He moved quickly, negotiating between makeshift beds that lined the hallways, searching for his apprentice. He tried not to feel the pain that radiated off those in need of assistance.

Not finding Obi-Wan readily Qui-Gon got the attention of one of the droids.

"Have you seen my apprentice?"

The droid, who by its very nature could not feel the fatigue that had overtaken many of its human counterparts, computed quickly that it hadn't seen Obi-Wan for quite some time. Then it suggested Qui-Gon try the banquet hall, where the overflow was. Qui-Gon nodded curtly, already turning away.

In the banquet hall, the same place where the dancing had been just a few nights before, Qui-Gon couldn't see Obi-Wan. All he saw were rows of people laid out with a few blankets. They were being tended by one droid. Although the building was fairly quiet compared to the medical centre, the sound of the suffering made Qui-Gon's head throb.

He walked part way up the steps to the mezzanine to get a better view of the room. Obi-Wan wasn't here either. Backing off the steps he suppressed his frustration towards his wayward apprentice. Then out of the corner of his eye he caught sight of Obi-Wan's cloak.

Qui-Gon's heart leapt into his throat. He jumped down from the stairs and swiftly crossed the room. A part of him hoped that Obi-Wan had merely lent his cloak to a patient when no more blankets could be found. It was an unworthy thought for a Jedi.

Obi-Wan lay curled up on his side on the dance floor, shivering. His face was red and shone with fever. His open eyes were unseeing but he blinked rapidly as Qui-Gon knelt beside him.

"Padawan?" Qui-Gon called softly placing a hand on Obi-Wan's head. The boy was burning up.

Through clenched teeth Obi-Wan tried to talk.

"C-c-cold...so cold."

Qui-Gon removed his own cloak and draped it over his apprentice. He looked around desperately but even the one droid had disappeared. Not that there was anything the droid could have done...no! He would not think that way.

Fighting back a sense of panic, Qui-Gon tried to formulate some kind of plan. His first impulse was to take Obi-Wan away from this place. Put him in their ship and fly him back to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant where the healers could focus their energies on ridding him of this disease. But that was impossible. Firstly because he'd never get off the planet with the quarantine in place. And secondly, because the Jedi Temple would not allow him to bring the infection of an unknown disease to Coruscant.

Even if he couldn't take Obi-Wan off this dying planet he could take him out of this place of misery.

"Obi-Wan," he said gently, pulling the boy into a sitting position. "Come on, padawan."

He helped Obi-Wan to his feet and towards the door. In the end, it was easier for Qui-Gon to carry his apprentice. He did so effortlessly, holding the boy close, as though he could banish the illness just by contact.

*****

That night was long and dark for Qui-Gon. He took Obi-Wan to his room in the government house, which was all but abandoned now. Although Obi-Wan's skin was hot to the touch he still shivered violently under the blankets Qui-Gon provided for him. Delirious with fever, he spoke nonsensically, sometimes blurting out lessons about the Force.

Qui-Gon's heart ached watching him. He did his best but his healing skill was woefully inadequate for the need.

The fact that Obi-Wan had contracted the illness greatly complicated the theory that the homeworlders had brought this disease. Obi-Wan had been in contact with the delegation for almost a week prior to their arrival at the colony. And he had been healthy until the others started getting sick.

As much as he was disturbed by the new theory that was formulating in his mind, Qui-Gon could see no other alternative but that the homeworld delegation had infected the colonists knowingly and with malicious intent.

The part that had him puzzled though was how they managed to do it. All of the colony's settlements had reported cases of the disease and yet the delegation had remained in the capital city. And Obi-Wan was sick yet Qui-Gon was not.

Qui-Gon replayed their stay here in his mind. He was sure that he and Obi-Wan had been to all the same places, met with all the same people, eaten the same kinds of foods, and drunk from the same water supply. He tried to think of other possible methods of contagion. He considered the few colonists who hadn't yet become ill, wondering what it was that protected them. Did they have some kind of natural immunity to the disease? Did he?

Qui-Gon looked down at his apprentice sleeping restlessly. He couldn't just sit here and watch Obi-Wan die. He couldn't do it. What could he do?

Suddenly Qui-Gon's head snapped up. There was something Obi-Wan had done without Qui-Gon. The festival of lights on the second night of celebrations...

"I'm going out now," he told Obi-Wan as he stood. "But I won't be long. You just rest." He laid a hand on Obi-Wan's forehead and thought that he sensed the boy relax a little. He doubted very much whether Obi-Wan could hear his words, but he was compelled to speak them. "Everything is going to be fine, padawan. Just rest."

*****

It was dawn now as Qui-Gon wandered the main street. The cold greyness was fitting for the abandoned air of the once thriving metropolis. Scant droids were to be seen and they were few and far between.

Qui-Gon searched his memory for all that Obi-Wan had told him of the festival of lights. There had been thousands of orbs, about ten centimeters in diameter, which gave off a glow in various colours. The lights only lasted about four hours, just the length of the evening's festivities, before darkening to reveal a very plain looking glass ball. Obi-Wan had been enthralled as much by the beauty of the spectacle as by the joyful abandon which had overtaken the crowd.

Most of the orbs had been removed by cleaners in the intervening days. The few that Qui-Gon came across were badly broken. He hoped to find one in tact.

He had no proof, he told himself. Nothing but pure speculation. Speculation made more desperate by fear.

Qui-Gon finally spotted an unbroken orb, tucked away on a window sill. Reaching up he carefully pulled it off the sill and examined it. A quite ordinary looking glass. But these had been provided by the homeworlders for the celebration. And they had been sent to all settlements on the colony. Qui-Gon didn't have time to check, but he was fairly certain that the only members of the colony still healthy all shared one thing. They hadn't been celebrating that night.

*****

Sazi was startled by Qui-Gon's entrance. She'd been looking out the window on the grey morning. It was so quiet. She should have heard him coming. Instead his arrival made her jump.

"Master Qui-Gon," she greeted him with a strained voice. "I'm relieved to see you're still well."

"I am well," he told her curtly. "Millions of colonists are not. Obi-Wan is not."

Sazi looked sad but not very surprised.

"I am sorry," she began.

"Are you?" Qui-Gon asked harshly. "Because I don't really think you are. I think you're lying."

Sazi regarded him thoughtfully. She was quite amazed by his transformation. He seemed to be keeping a very tight rein on his emotions, something she previously had thought he didn't even possess.

He brought his hand out from under his cloak and placed the orb on her table.

"You brought this to these people. You can end this suffering and needless death."

Sazi avoided his gaze, more unnerved by his accusation than she wanted to show. Instead she focused on the orb.

"Sazi!"

She snapped her head back to look at him defiantly.

"You can stop this." While it wasn't a question there could be no mistaking the plea in his voice.

"I am not responsible for what has happened here," she told him.

"But you know how to stop it. You know of a cure for this?"

She turned back to the window instead of answering. He crossed the room to grasp her arm tightly, pulling her around to face him. She gasped.

"If you have the means to end this and you choose not to use it then you are responsible. You are responsible for the deaths of millions of people. Your own people!"

'He's angry,' she thought with some wonder. 'I didn't think Jedi got angry.'

She pulled out of his grasp and stepped back, appraising the situation.

"I need a reason to help you," she told him.

"What? What reason? Isn't it reason enough to help save the lives of the colonists?" Qui-Gon was shocked at her apparent nonchalance.

"And Obi-Wan," she reminded him.

"And Obi-Wan," he added, the pain showing clearly on his face.

'He's afraid,' she thought, even more amazed now. 'I thought that was a no-no for the Jedi too.'

"It's possible that we haven't been entirely honest with each other," she conceded slowly.

"I have always been totally honest with you," Qui-Gon snapped, nearing the end of his considerable patience. "You are the one who has not been honest with me!"

"Perhaps so," she agreed. "But if so then I had a reason that I considered worth more than the lie."

"Is this reason related to the one you need in order to help?"

How could she have thought this man had no passion? Sazi wondered. Instead of answering him she seemed to change the topic.

"My culture greatly admires the display of grand emotional exchanges," Sazi quoted to Qui-Gon. "Do you who told me that? Your apprentice, Obi-Wan. You must have taught him about the Galen people."

"I did," Qui-Gon admitted curtly.

"So let's have an emotional exchange and perhaps then the reasons will become clearer."

Qui-Gon took a deep breath, calling upon all his training and experience to remain calm. Just play along, he told himself, and she'll help. She wanted to help, he could sense it. Her conflict was strong. So he nodded at her.

Sazi sat on the table and picked up the orb.

"How are you feeling right now?" she asked.

"I don't see the relevance," began Qui-Gon, but she stopped him with a hard look. "I'm feeling...frustrated," he admitted. "Tired. Impatient."

She was shaking her head with some disbelief, some disappointment.

"You come to me with the news that your apprentice is deathly ill and when you open your feelings to me you label them as frustrated and impatient?" She sighed defeatedly and put the orb back down beside her.

"Helpless," Qui-Gon said softly. "I feel helpless. And I don't like the feeling very much."

There was a long silence while Sazi watched him. He stared back at her frankly, hoping against all hope that she would come to her senses and end this madness. He suddenly had the thought that she was dancing with him now much as she had with Obi-Wan a few nights ago. A somewhat more sinister step this time with so much hanging in the balance....what had Obi-Wan said? It seemed simple but put together was surprisingly complex.

"Okay Master Jinn," Sazi said quietly. "I have the cure you need and I will give it to you if you answer me this. And remember - honesty."

Qui-Gon nodded again.

"If I hand you this cure and tell you that you can use it to save the colonists or save Obi-Wan, which would you choose? One or the other, but not both."

Qui-Gon was appalled at her words but he didn't hesitate.

"I would choose the colonists."

Sazi hopped off the table to pace in front of him with an agitation he sensed was directed more at herself than at his response.

"It would be so easy for you," she spoke almost absently as though she hadn't meant to voice the thought aloud.

"Easy?" Qui-Gon took a step towards her and resisted the urge to shake some sense into her. "Easy? Nothing about that decision would be easy for me. To sacrifice Obi-Wan to save the colonists would be the right thing to do and I would do it. But make no mistake it would kill a part of me as well!" Qui-Gon drew a deep breath before adding quietly, "And Obi-Wan would never thank me for saving his life if it meant the death of even one other person to do it."

Sazi had an odd expression on her face. He almost thought she was going to cry.

"No, I don't suppose he would," she agreed softly.

"Is that what you want to hear Sazi?" Qui-Gon asked. "That I care for Obi-Wan? Yes, I care for him very much. He is like a son to me. For more than ten years I have watched him grow and I have taught him as best I could. I have had moments of pride and moments of fear..." Qui-Gon's voice trailed off.

"Like now?" she asked abruptly.

"Like now," he agreed coldly. "If I could trade places with him now I would do so in a second. And if he dies then I will feel a sadness, an emptiness you can't possibly imagine," he told her bitterly.

"I can imagine," Sazi told him harshly. "Make no mistake about that." Her voice softened. "I have a love too, you see..."

Suddenly he pulled out his lightsaber and ignited it before him.

"Would you like a glimpse into this Jedi's mind, Sazi? I can tell you right now that I feel nothing would give me more satisfaction than to relieve your shoulders from the weight of carrying your head. And I could do it so easily, so quickly...so needlessly."

"I believe you," Sazi whispered, staring at the weapon with awe.

"But I won't." He deactivated the saber and returned it to his belt. "I won't because I know that killing you would not make me feel any better, it would only make things worse. And it would lose me the chance of saving anyone on this planet. All the choices we make involve either action or inaction. There is responsibility attached to both."

"If I made you make a promise you would only save the colonists and not Obi-Wan, would you keep it?" she asked.

Qui-Gon was quiet for so long that she thought perhaps he wasn't going to answer.

"Yes, and before you ask, it would break my heart to do so, but that would be my choice." Qui-Gon sighed and spread his hands in a gesture of supplication. "I don't know how to be any more honest with you than that."

Sazi looked at her feet as though pondering his words.

'Obi-Wan was right to feel sorrow coming from this one,' Qui-Gon thought. If he wasn't feeling so torn inside from the situation she'd put him in, he might have had some pity for her.

"Master Jedi, you must know that I did not agree to the fate that my fellow delegates have inflicted upon the colonists," Sazi finally said, still looking to the ground.

"Silence is consent. You allowed them to do it, without protest," Qui-Gon chided her.

"Not without protest," Sazi told him, lifting her eyes to his and shaking her head. "I tried. I begged them to see reason. I had no choice. They took my choice away. Please! It is important to me that you understand this!"

Qui-Gon wasn't ready to ease her conscience just yet. He hadn't been listening to her well enough to understand her reason. He regarded her stonily until she looked away ashamed.

"You have no idea what will happen if I help you," she whispered.

"I have a very good idea of what will happen if you don't," he said. "And may their spirits haunt you daily for it."

Her expression was of one already haunted but she took a deep breath, for courage, when her decision was finally made.

"Your willingness to sacrifice one you love is inspiring to me, Master Jinn. And while I know you don't understand -- and how could you? -- my help to the colonists exacts an equally painful sacrifice from me."

She walked away from him then, leaving him wondering at her words and the contradictory emotions he sensed from her. She returned almost immediately with a datachip which she held out to him with a trembling hand.

"All but one as you promised, Master Jinn," she whispered with tears in her eyes. "His spirit haunting me will be as large as any chorus, but that will be my cross to bear."

Qui-Gon took the information from her with a feeling of both relief and despair.

"And mine also, Sazi," he said bitterly.

*****

Qui-Gon delivered the information to the medical centres and stayed long enough to ensure that the cure would be effective and that there were enough medic droids to administer aid. He then retreated back to the government house, back to his ailing apprentice.

Obi-Wan seemed slightly better but Qui-Gon knew that it was a false impression of hope. He sat by the boy, wiping the sweat from his feverish face with a cool cloth, and wondered how to tell him that all would be well but not for him.

"Master," Obi-Wan said with a hoarse voice, "you came back."

Qui-Gon smiled sadly.

"Of course I did."

Obi-Wan reached out to clutch at Qui-Gon's hand. Qui-Gon held his hand gently and opened his mouth to speak but no sound came out. Obi-Wan watched him intently. Qui-Gon closed his eyes to collect his thoughts. When he opened them again Obi-Wan was still staring at him -- through him.

"Padawan, I want to tell you something about the Force," he began.

At this Obi-Wan's head turned away from Qui-Gon so that he was facing the wall. He tried to draw his hand back but Qui-Gon wouldn't let go.

"What is it, Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon asked.

"I can no longer feel the Force," Obi-Wan admitted softly as though ashamed. "Whenever I try, I only feel misery."

Qui-Gon bowed his head to focus fully. He tried to cast aside his own feelings of failure and sorrow, his controlled rage towards the homeworlders, and his fear for Obi-Wan. Instead he felt the ebb and flow of the Force tingle inside him, coming from all around them and with all his concentration he projected this into his apprentice.

Obi-Wan relaxed immediately, turning back towards Qui-Gon with such an expression of peace that the Jedi Master knew he'd been successful. Tears overflowed in the older man's eyes.

"Master?" Obi-Wan questioned.

"Don't you worry Obi-Wan," his master said gently. "Everything is going to be fine. Just fine."

Obi-Wan's eyes slowly closed and Qui-Gon sat in the failing light, holding the boy's hand for comfort as much to channel the Force into him. Letting out a long shuddering sigh, he closed his own eyes which pushed the tears more insistently down his cheeks.

When he opened them a moment later it was to see Sazi crouched beside Obi-Wan. The young woman had a determined look with her mouth a straight line as she administered the medication.

"You listen to your master, Obi-Wan," she hissed at the unconscious man. "If you never pay attention to another word he says to you, you listen to him now!"

She laid a hand across his brow and felt for his pulse along his neck. Then, satisfied that the drug was working, she twisted on her heels to face Qui-Gon with the expression of defiance he had come to expect from her.

"Aren't you going to ask me why?"

"Why?" asked Qui-Gon, still astonished by her presence.

She looked back at Obi-Wan, touching his cheeks lightly with both her hands.

"Because the spirit of my beloved haunting me is more than enough to bear without adding this one as well."

*****

Qui-Gon tried very hard not to show his amusement at the relish with which Obi-Wan was attacking his food. The Jedi master was pleased to see his apprentice had regained an appetite as the illness had left Obi-Wan looking a trifle gaunt. A few more meals like this one and Obi-Wan would be back to his old healthy self.

"Master." Obi-Wan paused a moment in the inhalation of his dinner. "What will happen to Sazi?"

"She will be tried with the other delegates," Qui-Gon told him. "But her cooperation will no doubt be considered for her sentence."

Obi-Wan chewed thoughtfully.

"I still don't understand why she went along with their plot," he confessed.

"The Galen wanted to rid themselves of a problematic relationship with their colony. Rather than come to terms, they decided to eliminate the colonists. Sazi was an artisan who designed the orbs for the festival of light. They needed her to use them as a method of spreading the contagion. To assure her cooperation they threatened her..." Qui-Gon paused to think of the correct word, "...her soul mate."

Obi-Wan was shaking his head, still looking confused.

"But even so -- she was willing to kill all those people just to protect one person. How could she live with that?"

"Not just to protect one person, padawan," corrected Qui-Gon. "But to protect someone very special to her. Someone connected to her heart."

Obi-Wan still looked skeptical.

"And in the end," continued Qui-Gon, "she couldn't live with it. And so she lost him."

Qui-Gon thought about Sazi's unspoken demand when she'd handed him the cure. 'If I have to give up someone I love to save these people, then so do you.' Yet when it came to it, she couldn't allow that to happen either.

"Do not judge her too harshly, young padawan," Qui-Gon said softly. "Some day you may face a decision just as painful and only then will you know how the loss of one may seem as great as the loss of many."

Obi-Wan would never have thought that Qui-Gon would condone Sazi's behaviour, yet he sensed an extraordinary amount of sympathy from his master. He still wasn't sure what had transpired between them to get Sazi's cooperation. All Qui-Gon had told him was that Sazi came to realize the enormity of the crime and sought to fix the situation before it was too late.

A simple explanation...that was surprisingly complex.

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