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Moogle War II
Doma Sentry: Eric! We got a Fax!
Me: Lemme see.
It says:
HA HA HA HA!!!! WE'VE TAKEN SOUTH FIGARO, THAMASA AND THE ESPER
WORLD!! WE ARE TOO POWERFUL FOR YOU!!! SURRENDER NOW!!!
HIGH COMMANDER MOG SIGNING OFF!!!
Me: This is not good.
So for an actual year the Moogle Borgs and the free peoples fight endlessly, the Moogles abducting women, the humans trying to retake their cities. The Lizar, staying out of this one, simply watched the two foolish races clash. A neutral side was formed, but the Moogle Borg quickly assimulated it. To improve his chances, Mog revived the statues. The humans countered this by reviving the Giant of Babil. This backfired and both sides
suffered heavy losses, and the Giant reshaped the world before the Lizar got sick of it and destroyed it. The humans made a second attempt to level the playing field by reviving the goddess Tyr. That also backfired. The Moogles assimulated Windia and gained the powers of the great bird (seeing as all airships were
destroyed in the last MW.) The humans countered this by trying to conquer the Dragon Clan. Of course, the dragon clan whupped them. It was beginning to look very bleak for the humans.
Soldier: General!
Me: WHAT!?! WHAT!?!
Soldier: The Moogle Borg are advancing again!
Nick: We're all gonna die! We're all gonna die!
Soldier: Agreed. I'm gonna go turn traitor.
Me: No you're not. (kills the soldier)
Nick: We're all gonna die! We're all gonna die!
So we meet the Moogles at the battlefield...
Mog: Surrender now or we'll kill you.
Me: You'll kill us either way!
Mog: Oh yeah. Well, we want four things:
Schala
Kaitlin
Marie
Your death
Me: Deja vu.
Mog: Hand them over or else we kill you.
Me: But you just said you'd kill us anyway.
Mog: Well yeah, but...
Me: We fight.
So they charge into each other, hacking each other's innards out, feeding the grass lots of nutritious blood, slaughtering each
other, until a dragoon comes rushing into the middle of the
battlefield.
Kain: Stop this senseless fighting!
Mog: No! (impales Kain on a spear)
Me: Kain? KAIN!?! Oh Mog, you little %@#$&...
Mog: Uh...
Me: All this time...all this because I revived Kain, and now for
nothing...
Mog: Why are your eyes turning red? Why is there smoke coming out
of your nose?
Me: Mog, I am going to tear you apart and feed you to the birds!
ERAU!
Mog: AUUUUGH!! (runs away)
Me: I'm gonna cut out your heart and feed it to a buffalo! I'm
gonna set your fuzzy fur on fire and hang you off Mt. Ordeals!
I'm gonna peel off all your skin and put you in cleaner! I'm
gonna... (fades out as I chase him over the horizon)
Schala: Should we follow them?
Azala: (suddenly appearing) No, he's earned this. We'd better go
revive Kain.
So the two sides disembark and go their seperate ways.
Until...
In a retirement home somewhere in the tropics...
Soldier: General Alan!
Alan (getting out of rocking chair): What, Sonny?
Soldier: Well, the Moogles were defeated, but your homeland is
already in trouble again.
Alan: How so?
Soldier: An army of chocobos just came in and pecked everyone to death.
Alan: Oh no....
OH NO!!! THE MOOGLE WAR IS OVER, ALL THE GENERALS ARE GONE, AND THERE'S A CHOCOBO WAR STARTING!!! WILL THE WORLD SURVIVE???
---
TO BE CONTINUED!!
The Chocobo War, Part I
Questions? Comments? Praise? Flames? Address them to
the author, Eric Bowling!
Go to my FFML fanfic page, my main fanfic page, my Final Fantasy page, or
my main page
Send little ole me your comments! I'm big on typos, too, so if you spot one, let me know!
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