Gary: You know if you buy them by the dozen it’s a lot cheaper, of course though, you have to eat them before they go stale…

Sandra: …you mean like your conversation! Can’t we return to what we’re paid for!

Gary: but that’s the beauty of it, the more you eat, the more you save!

(Gary reaches into his jacket pocket and produces a heavily damaged glazed donut and picks a few of the many items stuck to it off)

Gary: Here, you want one?

Sandra: Ewwwwwwwwww!!!! Take it away!!

(Gary tilts his head as if to say “your loss honey!” before stuffing it whole into his mouth. Just then the lights flicker low and the sound of a rattlesnake’s rattle hisses. “Bad Company” begins to play as a spotlight begins to play in the ring, the symbol A8 fading into it in black lights. Another spotlight hits the entranceway as Brandi Lynn walks out. She wears a windbreaker with a skeleton’s hand holding five cards. Two black aces, two black eight’s and the deuce of spades….the Deadman’s hand!)

Sandra: Now that’s some symbolism in this newcomer to BRA!

Gary: Too much show, she’ll have to come out big to beat the hawk!

(As she slides under the ropes and makes a lap waving to the crowd, “People of the Sun” by Rage against the Machine” begins to blare over the loudspeakers as green pyrotechnics obscure the stage. Suddenly, out of the green fire, Skye Soaring Hawk, her jean vest, matching daisy dukes, her knee high buckskin boots obscured by a floor length leather duster. With her face shaded by a wide brimmed flat-topped cowboy hat, she strode down the aisle smiling widely as she slapped hands with the cheering crowd. )

Sandra: It sounds like Skye’s popularity grows with every match she wrestles!

Gary: And no wonder. She knows what the Body Shop is really all about!

Sandra: It appears her opponent tonight shares Skye’s views on Sherry and the Shop!

Gary: Two prime candidates for the best group in wrestling, the Sisterhood! They are really going places! Did you see the Little Marquise earlier! She’s going to be another Yvette!

Sandra: Supposedly you mean that as a good thing!

(Skye slides into the ring after giving her duster to an attendant, then flings her hat to a lucky child in the audience before setting down in the corner.)

DING DING DING

(Both wrestlers are out quickly, meeting in the center and locking up. In a flash Skye hip tosses Brandi to the mat, then drops an iron fist to her opponent’s stomach. Brandi gasps as the fist drives the wind from her. Getting up quickly, Skye raises a leg and follows with a guillotine leg drop to the throat, but Brandi rolls away just in time.)

Sandra: Great timing for Brandi Lynn! If that leg would have connected, she was going to hurt for a while!

Gary: She’s already hurt. Those fists of Hawk’s aren’t toys! Look how slow she is getting up!

(Brandi pulls herself to her feet as Skye rubs her leg from missing the drop. Brandi grabs the hurt leg and twists it into a stepover toehold, leaning into it and making her opponent wince.)

Sandra: Tables have turned! Brandi seems to want to slow the match down. She is cautious of Hawk’s speed.

(Brandi keeps pouring on the pressure. Every time Skye seems close to breaking it she twists it harder, driving her opponent to the mat. Finally, she breaks it and in a swift motion drops an elbow to the inner thigh of the hurt leg, making her opponent jolt! Grabbing the leg she drags Hawk to the center of the ring before dropping a knee into the same spot.)

Gary: That’s rough work! Hawks left leg is going to hurt for a while!!

Sandra: No doubt! Brandi seems to be running the match the way SHE wants!

(Grabbing her opponent by the hair, Brandi pulls her up to her feet. Skye favors the left leg noticeably as Brandi pulls her in setting up for what looks like a suplex..)

Sandra: This is going to hurt!

Gary: NOOOOOOO!!!!

Sandra: Wow! What power!

(IN a show of strength Skye pulls up hard and reverses the suplex, dropping Brandi hard to the mat! Showing a burst of energy she pulls her stunned foe up and grabbing her head, turns it into a spinning neckbreaker. Brandi hits the mat, rolling slowly and in obvious distress.)

Gary: Never…and I mean NEVER count Skye Soaring Hawk out of a match!

Sandra: She is very tough! I don’t think Brandi was quite prepared for that!

Gary: Watch those fists! Skye is going to work with them now!

(A quick drop to the mat and Skye's fist buries deep into Brandi’s stomach, forcing her body to jackknife. Hitting the mat, Brandi swings a fist wildly, catching Hawk square in the jaw and knocking her over. She gets to her knees first, grasping her stomach with one hand and waits for Skye to get to her knees, then…)

Sandra: Nice short arm clothesline! Again, Hawk was not expecting it!

(Dragging herself up, Brandi hauls Hawk up by her hair and slings her into the corner. Skye slumps as Brandi quickly runs at her, only to be met with a firm foot to her stomach, dropping her hard!)

Gary: Never…and I mean NEVER…

Sandra: yeah yeah! We know!! I guess Brandi underestimated Skye’s strength!

(Skye limps out of the corner, the effects of Brandi’s tactics showing and pulls a groggy Brandi to her feet. Taking a step back she delivers a spinning wheel kick to her stunned opponents jaw. Brandi drops like the Berlin Wall to the mat!)

Gary: It’s all over but the crying!!

Sandra: I have to agree! Here it comes! OUCH! What a DDT!

Gary: The setup! Now for the finish!

(Skye has climbed to the top turnbuckle. Her opponent lies groaning on her back on the mat. Hawk raises her arms in the air, and leaps, frog splashing down!!)

Gary: She’s got it!!!! The Bird of Prey!!!

(The ref falls to the mat counting)

ONE…..

TWO…

THREE!!

DING DING DING

Sandra: Its over! What a fight between these two competitors! No one wanted to quit this one!

Gary: Never count…

Sandra: GEEZ!!

(Skye helps her opponent to her feet. As she hooks Brandi’s arm around her shoulder, she yells to the crowd, “Finally, a competitor who has also realized the Body Shop for the cancer it has become!” With that, she helps Brandi from the ring and to the dressing rooms.)

Sandra: That’s a pretty negative attitude! Peggy left and she never thought anything like that!

Gary: Don’t you know anything! Sherry fired her! That quitting thing was just a cover up to save her face! Sherry sure didn’t sit long before replacing her, that’s for sure.

Sandra: We’ll save that for another time. For now, Skye Soaring Hawk wins!

WINNER: Skye Soaring Hawk by pinfall.