Sandra: Welcome back! Good fortune seems to smile on us finally. We can be guaranteed some intelligent conversation….oh geez…never mind!

Gary: (finally returning) Why? You leaving!

Sandra: What is that on your head?

Gary: Oh this old thing! Don’t you know what’s coming next?

Sandra: The hardcore match between Skye and Tiffany.

Gary: “A” for effort! Hardcore calls for hard hat! Hehe! I got it from one of the camera crew in the lounge!

Sandra: Presumably you thing someone would bother you during this match! They have each other to worry about!

All the lights go off and a red spotlight circles around the arena. A

woman's deep voice says, "She, who has lost her trust in humans, is

damned with Wrath." A firecracker explodes at the top of the stairs

above the fans. Madonna's 'Frozen blares over the speakers. As the loud

humming starts, the red light sets on Tiff coming to the ring from

between the crowd. She then climbs the announcer’s table and stands there, looking around. With a flourish she removes her coat and tosses it down, revealing her black bikini before jumping down and into the ring.

Gary: (removing the coat from his head) See, I told ya we would need it!

"People of the Sun" by Rage Against

the Machine, blares over the loudspeakers as green pyrotechnics obscure

the stage. Suddenly, out of the green fire, Skye Soaring Hawk, her

jean vest, matching daisy dukes, and knee-high buckskin boots obscured

by a floor-length leather duster, her face shaded by a flat-topped,

wide-brimmed cowboy hat, strides down the aisle, a wide smile spreading

across her face as she pumps her barbwire-wrapped hands in the air.

She slides under the bottom rope, tossing her duster to an attendant

then throwing her hat to a lucky fan, finally sinking into the corner

to wait for the bell.

Sandra: Both women are looking pretty intense out there! They will of course be meeting again at the PPV coming up!

Gary: Oh yes! Sand, sun, beach babes and jello wrestling!

Sandra: I think it’s a BRA first for sure! We’ve had a catfight, why not stoop to this!

Gary: Stoop? It’s what the people want!

Sandra: Only disgusting perverts like you!

In the background the bell rings and both wrestlers circle cautiously, the respect for the others ability plain. As they move to lock up, Skye catches Tiffany with an arm drag, but both women are back on their feet in a moment.

Sandra: Nice speed there by Skye! She is quicker than Tiffany!

Gary: And has that nasty looking barbed wire on her fists!

Meanwhile, Tiffany shows some speed of her own as she fakes a lock up, then scoops Skye up for a bodyslam. Getting up she quickly throws down an elbow drop but winces as she hits the mat instead of her quicker opponent. As she gets up she is met by a sidekick to the head that drops her hard.

Sandra: Tiffany went down hard there!

Gary: This is hard core, you get to use whatever you want! Obviously Skye understands that well!

Sandra: What are you saying??

Gary: Nothing at all, Hehe!

Grabbing a stunned looking Tiffany up, Skye tucks her head under her arm and falls back with a DDT. Tiffany moans as she rolls on to her back, holding her head. Skye grabs both legs and tucks them under her arms and with a mighty effort, falls back and slingshots Tiffany hard into the turnbuckles!

Sandra: Ow! As a woman, I felt that!

Gary: As a MAN I felt that!

Moving quickly to the corner, Skye leaps and drives a boot right into the small of Tiffany’s back, sending her dropping to the mat. As she crumples to the mat, Skye shoves her out onto the floor with her boot.

Sandra: Looks like Tiffany’s approach may have been a bit too conservative! Skye is quicker and not holding anything back.

Gary: I wonder if she really knows what hardcore means?

Sandra: If she doesn’t, she’s going to find out shortly!

Skye has rolled out onto the floor and picked up a folding metal chair and laid it on top of her prostrate foe. Returning to the ring, she grabs another chair on the way up and climbs to the top turnbuckle.

Gary: Lesson number one!

With a yell Skye leaps from the top, chair first and dives down to Tiffany. Somehow, Tiffany senses the danger and throws herself to the side, the chair clattering to the floor just before the flying native hits her. The vicious clang of the chair hitting the floor with the flying wrestler on it was unmistakable.

Sandra: Lesson number one, but for who!

Gary: She seems to be learning pretty quick!

Tiffany drags herself to her feet and grabs one of the chairs. Raising it above her head she throws it on to the back of her opponent.

‘

“The epitaph is written on your back this night!”

Bending down she picks up a stunned Soaring hawk and lifts her off the floor and then down across her knee in a backbreaker! Rolling her off her knee, Tiffany heads toward another chair, but as she bends over to pick it up two trenchcoat clad blonde women leap from the crowd and start to attack a surprised Tiffany!

Gary: Well that comes as NO surprise these days!

Sandra: They look like their using clubs or something similar!

Gary: It is hardcore! I guess Skye is using them as a weapon!

The women continue to try and beat on Tiffany as she tries to defend herself! Skye starts getting her bearings and wobbles to her feet. Shaking her head she sees the attack going on and rushes at the two assailants. Startled, one turns quickly and loses her wig, letting her long dark hair fall.

Gary: Kimie Kurita! What is she doing here!

Sandra: I’m sure I have no idea, but you can lay odds on who the other one was!

Gary: Probably Sherry Ann! She likes to cheat!

Sandra: Maybe, but I’ll be willing to bet the other was Kelly Mase!

As the two assailants flee, one of them drops a club in the rush. Skye chases them briefly before returning. Tiffany has gotten back to her feet and looks to Skye with a look of rage! Skye just shakes her head, but Tiffany is not convinced and makes a grab for the club on the floor. However, Skye has anticipated the move and meets Tiffany’s chin with a swift kick. Tiffany falls back stunned. Skye hauls Tiffany up and with a run, rams her opponents head into the ringpost! As her head comes away, a trickle of blood can be seen from just above her left eye.

Sandra: If this is hardcore, I’ll stick to what I know!

Gary: Chocolate brownies?

Sandra: Swine! Give me an old fashioned match any day! I’d rather watch Eden Starr and Peggy Christian wrestle than this!

Gary: I’d rather watch paint dry than watch them! It would be far more entertaining!

Sandra: At least it would be straight up, fair wrestling! No cheating!

As Skye drags Tiffany from the ringpost, she backs her onto the canvass.

“Send the Shop my love!”

Skye then drives her fists hard into her opponent’s belly! Three…four…five…six times! The barbed wire on her fists does its work as Tiffany’s belly is scratched deeply in several places, causing more blood to flow from the battered blonde! Tiffany slumps writing to the floor. Skye gets her up and carries her to the announcer’s table. Setting her up she lifts her up and over, suplexing Tiffany hard to the table! The announcer’s dive away to the sides as the Wrath smashes into the tabletop. As the table sags, Tiffany is dragged off and rolled under the ropes into the ring. Sandra and Gary recover after a moment.

Gary! See, told you this hat would come in handy!

Sandra: How much more punishment can these women take!

Gary: Not much more I think! Watch.

Skye has climbed to the top turnbuckle and spread herself out, arms to the air.

Gary: Looks like a modified Bird of Prey! This could be over!

As Skye leaps off in a frog splash, Tiffany shows her resilience one more time as she manages to tuck her knees up to her chest just before she is crushed! With an audible groan, Skye crashes hard into Tiffany’s knees and falls off gasping in agony. Tiffany rolls over onto her stunned opponent, blood oozing from many cuts. The ref drops to the mat.

ONE!

TWO!!

THREE!!!

Sandra: Oh migod! She’s done it! Tiffany’s turned it around1

Gary: I don’t believe it! I thought she was finished!

Tiffany just rolls off her opponent and both women lay motionless on the mat, too exhausted to move.

Gary: I guess we’ll be back after we clean up this mess! Tiffany wins it!

WINNER: Tiffany Epitaphine by pinfall