"Viper" Leslie Magnus vs. Sasha the Dragon Lady
The arena is going crazy for the BRA action. Row after row of fans on their feet all the way to the top of the arena. The camera pans across the wild and rowdy sea of humanity, taking a moment to stop on a few of the more interesting signs present in the crowd. The more entertaining ones say� "Is it Happy Hour yet?", "I'm Melissa's Best Buddy!" and "I worship Nina!" The camera comes to rest on Cari and Kenny.
Kenny: Howdy folks�up next do we ever have an interesting one.
Cari: This is my kind of match.
Kenny: This one could get interesting in a hurry. Sasha taking on the Fallen Angel Champ Lesley Magnus. This is a non-title match. But keep in mind that Sasha has never lost in BRA.
Cari: That's 'cause she's nuts.
Kenny: She does have some problems.
Cari: If you call Patricia Flex and Janus problems.
Kenny: I mean personal problems.
Cari: By the way�I really like this new attitude Lesley has.
Kenny: Beating up little boys?
Cari: The kid's fine!
(The sound of hissing slowly fades up, filling the arena. On the Angeltron, the image of a pit viper, curled up against a wall, slowly shifts its head side to side ready to strike. In a flash it strikes, opening its gaping maw, showing two long fangs before engulfing the lens. At the same time, green and white pryo explode from the wrestler entrance as the sound of George Thorogood and the Destroyers blasts over the loudspeakers. ) I walked forty-seven miles of barbed wire, I got a cobra snake for a necktie
A brand new house on the road side, and it's a-made out of rattlesnake hide
Got a brand new chimney put on top, and it's a-made out of human skull
Come on take a little walk with me baby, and tell me who do you love?
Who do you love?
Who do you love?
(The crowd rises to its feet as the "Viper" Lesley Magus steps out from behind the pyro, dragging a garbage can filled with assorted tools for mayhem. She is dressed in a green spandex sports bra and black martial arts pants, her hair tied tight behind her head in a ponytail. Her hands are partially covered by black fingerless gloves. A tattoo of a Viper curls up her arm and around her shoulder, and as always, a long link of bike chain is wrapped around her neck and down her torso.. Jet black wrestling boots cover her feet as she stands glaring into the ring. Around her waist, the Fallen Angel Title. The crowd boo's and jeer's the new champion, they're disgust and shock over how she won the belt still a vivid image in their minds. Lesley stops on the ramp and pulls a microphone to her lips.)
Viper: "Shut up! You wanted to teach me a lesson Johnny? You think you can handle me? I put your little British tramp to sleep last week and I'm just getting started messing up your girls. I'm sick and tired of hearing about how bad I was, how cruel I was. I did what had to be done , and I felt damn good doing it. Last week you sent out Shea and I put her down. Now you put me in a match with a reject from Japan who thinks cause she taught Freakshow how to be cruel, that she's going to scare me. Uh uh, But you Johnny, you wanted to send me a message. Well, big man, I've got one for you."
(Lesley tosses the microphone aside and pulls an italian flag from the garbage can. Lesley holds the flag up, before spitting on it and tossing it to the ramp. She then pulls a small can from the container and spills it contents onto the flag. Digging into her pocket, Lesley pulls match and strikes it across her boot. Viper smiles as she drops the flame onto the flag. It immediately ignites, sending flames shooting around it, consuming the fabric in seconds. Lesley cracks a grin and glares at the ring, before stepping through the burning flag, dragging the garbage can behind her.)
Kenny: What is this nonsense?
Cari: She's sending a message to Johnny.
As the arena goes dark, two female figures can be seen by the entry. Suddenly, a fireball seems to appear from one of the figure's mouth. "Problem Child" from AC/DC hits the arena speakers, Sasha the Dragon Lady appears at the top of the stage. Behind her is The Oakland Enforcer Brenda Busley. Sasha wears black leather pants and a blue velvet shirt. She finishes the outfit with her customary turquoise and yellow cowboy boots. The blond woman has her shirt sleeves rolled back to show off her tattoos. She struts to the ring, showing her disdain for the fans. They boo her and shower her with debris. Behind her walks Brenda, arms folded in front of her chest. Brenda wears black leather pants and black biker boots. She has on a black "Hit Squad" T shirt. Her large arms are covered in biker tattoos. She follows slowly behind her boss. She carries a black leather bag. Sasha continues to argue with the fans. Finally she reaches the ring and enters, with Brenda following behind her. Sasha stands in the center of the ring and holds her hands up, smiling and waving for the fans to show more dislike towards her. And they do. They boo her lustily. Sasha has a controlled look in her eyes, the look of the wrestler/mercenary she is best known as. She snickers at Lesley's flag burning display and loosens up for the match.
Lesley: Well well well, so, who am I fighting today? The monster that trained the freak, or the little bitch that killed her sister?
Kenny: That wasn't nice.
Sasha looks at Lesley with a healthy amount of confusion in her eyes. She rips into her pocket and pulls something out. With a flick we see that it's a metal folding batton. She swings it at Lesley and hits Viper flush on the knee as the bell sounds for the start of the match. Sasha continues to pummel Lesley with the batton as the ref stands in disbelief. Sasha shows nothing but animal rage in her eyes.
Cari: Hello Nancy Kerrigan.
Kenny: Viper may have wanted to choose her words a bit more carefully. That sister thing seems to be a sore subject in the Sasha family.
Cari: Is she ever going to town on Viper with that thing.
Kenny: Sasha standing Lesley and choking her with the batton. I think Lesley's turning blue.
Cari: Shoulda' let sleeping dogs lie.
Kenny: Now Sasha sends Viper to the ropes�.owww! And shoots that pole into Lesley's midsection as Lesley comes back from the ropes. Lesley doubled over in the center of the ring.
Cari: Sasha is positively brutal right now. I love it!
Kenny: Sasha sends that metal pole right down on Lesley's back�driving the Viper to her knees. And a kick to the face! Lesley is on the mat�and she's in a healthy amount of trouble right now.
Cari: Where's the beer guy?
Kenny: Sasha tosses away the batton. And now I see a very different look in her eyes. She pulls Viper up and holds her by the hair. Sasha is now gesturing to the fans and smiling.
Cari: She's wasting time.
Kenny: I think she's lost it. She whips Magnus to the ropes�and here comes a clothesline�No! Lesley ducks and rolls out of the ring. Now she's out here trying to get a bit of a break.
Cari: And Sasha's just standing in the ring, looking stunned. She seems disoriented.
Kenny: Lesley has collected her breath and she rolls back into the ring. She gets up behind Sasha�who is still looking around�and Wham! Big neck breaker from Viper puts Sasha down.
Cari: I like this�
Kenny: The match?
Cari: No. My beer.
Kenny: Ok. Lesley goes to her weapons bin�and what does she have there?
Cari: Looks like a staple gun�
Kenny: Oh my lord! Viper is stapling Sasha's forehead. And again! And again! Blood is starting to flow from Sasha's forehead.
Cari: Viper stopping. She may be out of staples. And now she's slamming Sasha in the head with the staple gun. Sasha in a world of hurt.
Kenny: Viper throws the staple gun away and sends a few kicks down on Sasha. Sasha is really starting to bleed.
Cari: Now this is getting interesting.
Kenny: Sasha is crawling towards the corner while Viper follows after her. Sasha is standing herself up in the corner and�
Cari: Did you see that?
Kenny: Brenda just handed something to Sasha. Sasha has it hidden in her shirt pocket. Lesley comes over and sends a knee to Sasha's midsection�followed by a few punches. She's hammering away on Sasha.
Cari: Look out!
Kenny: Sasha reached into her shirt pocket and slammed Lesley right in the face with the item Brenda handed her. And it seems to be�a light bulb!
Cari: Lesley recoils and she looks hurt. And more blood. This is a great match.
Kenny: Both women trying to lick their wounds right now. Lesley making sure there's no glass in her eyes while Sasha deals with her bloody forehead.
Cari: And here we go�Sasha looks at her blood, and there's that look in her eyes again!
Kenny: Sasha comes charging out of the corner and delivers a series of savate kicks to Lesley. Viper taking fire right now. And she's trying to get clear. Now Sasha's reaching into her pocket�
Cari: What have we here?
Kenny: It's�It's�.a bag full of thumb tacks!
Cari: Oh yes!!!!
Kenny: Sasha dropping the tacks on the mat. She grabs hold of Viper�no!
Cari: And Lesley rakes Sasha's eyes�catching the Dragon Lady off guard. What next?
Kenny: Lesley sends a few of her own kicks into Sasha's knees�and an elbow right between Sasha's eyes. Sasha goes down.
Cari: Can't someone fall on the tacks?
Kenny: Lesley going back to her bag of tricks. Both women are bloody messes right now. Lesley has something�it's�a frying pan!
Cari: Now this is interesting!
Kenny: Lesley hefts the pan and slams it right down into Sasha's midsection. Ohhhh!
Cari: I love that fleshy sound!
Kenny: And another. She may have done some internal damage to Sasha.
Cari: And there's a look in Sasha's eyes I've never seen before. She looks..scarred.
Kenny: Lesley hefts the pan again�and Sasha rolls out of the way at the last second. She's rolling out of the ring and going over to Brenda. No, wait, she's�trying to get away from Brenda?
Cari: She's completely gone. Who is she now?
Kenny: Brenda trying to steady her boss, but Sasha keeps pushing her away like a scarred child.
Cari: I just don't get this woman.
Kenny: Viper getting out of the ring and approaching Sasha�
Viper - What happened to the momma's girl. Silver spoon fed piece of crap like you think ya can be tough? You think beating up little Japanese girls made you a bad woman. Bitch, I've been kicking ass since I was 14 and I'm going to show you what a real beating is all about!
Kenny: Viper grabs Sasha�spins her�positions her�piledriver on the concrete.
Cari: That might be all.
Kenny: Cover�1�2�
Cari: Sasha gets the shoulder up!
Kenny: How? I thought that was it.
Cari: So did Viper. She's arguing with the ref about a slow count. And look at Sasha. The look is in her eyes again.
Kenny: Brenda helping Sasha to her feet. She's steadying her boss and handing something else. That's barbed wire!
Cari: Look out! Sasha is going after Viper with a strip of barbed wire. It's digging into Sasha's hand, but she's wiping Viper with it! She's completely nuts! I love it�blood everywhere!
Kenny: Lesley getting wiped with a strip of barbed wire. And both women getting hurt by this attack. But Sasha just does not seem to care�until now-
Cari: She needs to control her personalities. Now she looks like her hand is killing her and she's asking Brenda to get the barbed wire off her.
Kenny: Lesley in a bad way. She struggling back up�
Cari: Janus!
Kenny: Excuse me?
Cari: Janus sneaking up behind Viper�she turns her�Faces of pain! Right on the concrete!
Kenny: Sasha sees Janus and charges her�Faces of Pain! Janus has put both of them down! Now she rolls Sasha on top of Viper. Where's the ref?
Cari: This is all legal in a hardcore match.
Kenny: Here's the count�1...2...3!
Cari: Sasha gets the win!
Kenny: Neither of them look like they won. Janus is leaving both women in a bloody heap.
Cari: Now this is getting interesting.
Winner - Sasha.