Viper vs ???
Kenny: Welcome back ladies and gentlemen. This is the match that everyone has been waiting for.
Cari: Except for those strange ones that were actually hoping to see Willie Wienersnitzel naked.
Kenny: Very few of the fans, I can assure you. According to my statistics only 14.371% of the fans were hoping to see Willie get naked.
Cari: Now THAT is a scary statistic.
Kenny: For once I agree with you.
Cari: This match promises to be a blood bath. Johnny calls it a tag team match but it is really a three against one handicap match.
Kenny: I do believe that Viper needs to be punished for her despicable behavior but this is going too far.
Cari: Leslie could be permanently injured from this match.
Kenny: Something I am sure that Janus will have no problem with.
(Cari and Janus are interrupted by the Angeltron coming to life.)
Cari: What is this?
Kenny: It looks like a backstage camera is picking up a conversation.
Cari: Isn't that Johnny Angel? Who is he talking to?
Kenny: It's Lynette LaBrie, the crookedest ref in BRA.
(The camera pans to the Angeltron. Johnny Angel is talking to Lynette LaBrie in a dimly lit back room.)
Johnny: OK. You got all the info? I want Viper to lose and lose bad.
Lynette: Sure thing, but what do I get out of this.
Johnny: Your job. Plus I'll include something extra in your pay envelope. But there is one more thing.
Lynette: Name it.
Johnny: One of the stipulations is that Viper will lose her title if she touches any official in BRA. Referees are officials. When Viper touches you, don't stop the match, but take her belt away after the match.
Lynette: What if she doesn't touch me?
Johnny: I said WHEN she touches you. If she doesn't touch you, you will be looking for a new job on Tuesday. Get it?
Lynette: (Winking at Johnny) I get your meaning.
(The Angeltron goes dark and the camera goes back to the announcers' table.)
Cari:This is an outrage! Johnny not only plans on making Viper lose but is also going to take her hardcore title belt away.
Kenny: It does seem that Johnny is out to destroy Viper.
Cari: He wants to make her look like the inside of his office.
Kenny: I don't know how Viper will survive tonight.
Cari: This is so unfair.
(Kenny and Cari are interrupted by the entrance of Sakura Ito. Queen's "We are the champions" plays through the sound system as Sakura Ito makes her entrance. She looks around unsure of her self as though she is expecting someone else to be there. She walks to the ring and bows the fans and the referee.)
Cari: Where is that cowardly Celestial Champion of ours?
Kenny: I don't think she wants to take part in this massacre.
Cari: She's just too afraid to face Viper, even with three friends backing her up.
Kenny: Some people have honor.
Cari: And others have title belts. Something that Locke will lose for not showing up at the match.
Kenny: You're right Johnny put that stipulation into the match. If Lindsey doesn't show up, she will lose her belt.
Cari: At least one good thing will come out of this.
Kenny: The match will still be a two against one, I am sure that Janus will not help her partner, Viper, against her friend, Sakura.
Cari: Well, speak of the devil . . .
("Time" from The Chambers Brothers hits the speakers, Janus makes her way to the ring. She walks slowly and with purpose. She is dressed in her usual black leather pants and black velvet short, finishing the outfit with black and blue cowboy boots. She enters the ring and hugs Sakura.)
Cari: LOOK AT THAT! Viper's partner just hugged her opponent.
Kenny: I agree, this does not look good for Viper. Speak of the devil . . .
(The sound of hissing slowly fades up, filling the arena. On the Angeltron, the image of a pit viper, curled up against a wall, slowly shifts its head side to side ready to strike. In a flash it strikes, opening its gaping maw, showing two long fangs before engulfing the lens. At the same time, green and white pryo explode from the wrestler entrance as the sound of George Thorogood and the Destroyers blasts over the loudspeakers. )
"I walked forty-seven miles of barbed wire, I got a cobra snake for a necktie"
"A brand new house on the road side, and it's a-made out of rattlesnake hide"
"Got a brand new chimney put on top, and it's a-made out of human skull"
"Come on take a little walk with me baby, and tell me who do you love?"
"Who do you love?"
"Who do you love?"
(The crowd rises to its feet as the "Viper" Lesley Magus steps out from behind the pyro, dragging a garbage can filled with assorted tools for mayhem. She is dressed in a green spandex sports bra and black martial arts pants, her hair tied tight behind her head in a ponytail. Her hands are partially covered by black fingerless gloves. A tattoo of a Viper curls up her arm and around her shoulder, and as always, a long link of bike chain is wrapped around her neck and down her torso. Jet black wrestling boots cover her feet as she stands glaring into the ring. Behind her she drags a garbage can filled with assorted devices of mayhem. Around her waist, the Fallen Angel Title. The crowd boos and jeers the new champion, they're disgust and shock over how she won the belt still a vivid image in their minds. Lesley stops on the ramp and pulls a microphone to her lips.)
Viper: "Well, well, looks like Johnny's stacking the deck against me again! I get to face the whole freaking Threesome. Tag match? Tag match my ass! Fine, I don't back down from a challenge, but before we get it on, I want you two to see something."
(The angeltron roars to life, showing tape from earlier in the evening. Lindsey Locke steps out of her locker room and is nailed in the side of the head by Viper. The camera tries to follow as Viper drags Lindsey back into her room and slams the door shut. The sounds of violence and mayhem are heard through the door as the screen fades to black.)
(Viper cracks a smile.)
Viper: "Seems that our Celestial Champion won't be making this match, and since Johnny stipulated that anyone with a title had to participate or forfeit. It looks like Lindsey's going to lose her belt."
(The crowd roars its disapproval, booing the actions of Viper. Lesley just smirks and walks to the curtain. She reaches behind and drags a small figure with a hood over his face out onto the ramp.)
Viper: "You think you're Hardcore Janus! Did you think you could interfere in my match and not pay the price! It would be too easy to attack you, too simple. I want to hurt you Janus, and I've found the way."
(Lesley pulls the hood off the boy, revealing the scared boy to the crowd. It's Kevin, one of the few things of joy in Janus's life. Lesley grabs the boy and wraps her arm around his throat. He gags as she squeezes. Viper pulls two pairs of cuffs from her back pocket)
Viper: "Here's how its going to happen Freakshow. You and Sakura are going to leave the ring. Your going to take these cuff's and put them on each other. You got me! You two cuff each other to the guardrail together, or I'll snap this brat's neck on Live TV and the whole world will hear it!"
(Viper will make sure that Janus and Sakura cuff themselves to the guardrail before she walks down to the ring and cuff's Kevin to the ring post.)
Kenny: This is outragouis! I was feeling sorry for Viper, but this is despicable. For the second time she has used a young child to get her a victory. Are there no depths to which this woman will sink?
Cari: Brilliant! Positively brilliant! Johnny stacked the deck against her but Viper trumped all of his evil plans.
(The angeltron comes alive again and shows Johnny sitting in his room backstage watching the goings on in the ring. He flies into a tantrum he sees what Viper has done. He picks up a tray of food and slams it against the wall. The angletron then goes blank.)
Kenny: I have never seen Johnny so angry.
Cari: Viper has taught him a lesson. Never send a boy to do a man's job.
Kenny: I have to admit, Viper has beaten Johnny at his own game. I just don't like the way she did it.
Cari: Viper is the American Icon. She does whatever it takes to win no matter how high the odds. If the Threesome were really sincere wrestlers, they would have let the kid go. I can't believe that Lesley was able to use him twice against them.
Kenny: She does seem to know their Achilles heel.
(Janus and Sakura weave the hand cuffs through the barricade before attaching one end to each other. Viper smiles as she approaches them. Lynette Labrie, the referee, looks on in confusion. Viper picks up a chair and smiles at Sakura.)
Viper: Sakura, you're a fool. I used you to get what I want, and now that I have it. Consider our friendship dissolved.
Kenny: OHHH! A vicious chair shot to the head of the virtually defenseless Ito.
Cari: HAHAHA! I just love this new Viper. No more softness. This is a woman with one goal in mind, winning.
(Viper comes next to Janus. Janus stares with hatred at Viper but Viper merely smirks at her.)
Viper: Ready for your beating Freak? You think I'd just let your attack last week go unanswered. After I finish with you, I'm going to break that kids arm, just for fun.
(Viper raises the chair and strikes down toward Janus head with. Janus jerks to one side and puts her free arm up to shield herself. The Chair strikes her arm but misses her head. Viper raises the chair again and Viper raises her arm to block it. Viper quickly changes the position of the chair and rams it into Janus' stomach causing her to double over. Viper raises the chair again to strike Janus but Ito lashes out with her foot and kicks the chair out of Viper's hands.)
Kenny: A very athletic move by Sakura. She braced her hands on the guard rail and used them to kick at Viper.
Cari: I think that only stopped the beginning of Viper's attack. She is going back to her garbage can to get another weapon.
(Viper pulls out her bike chain from the garbage can. She begins twirling it over her head as she goes back to Janus and Ito. She lashes out with the chain at Janus. Janus sticks her arm up and the chain hits it hard and wraps around it. Janus pulls hard with her arm and Viper is pulled across Janus toward Sakura. Ito leaps up and wraps her legs around Viper's waist, holding Viper in place with a leg scissors. Janus unwraps the chain from her arm and holds the end of it in her cuffed hand. Viper uses her hands to break Sakura's scissors.)
Kenny: Viper was overconfident there. She is now trapped by Sakura and Janus is a bout ready to pound her.
(Janus rears back and hits Viper in the side of the head. She punches her again. Viper feels the effects of these two hard punches. Viper sends another punch into Viper's head. Lesley ignores Janus and continues to try to pry Ito's legs apart. Ito's muscular legs hold her like a vise, slowly squeezing the air from Viper's lungs. Janus slams another punch to Viper's head. Viper's legs almost buckle from the impact. Viper raises both her hands in a double axe handle, bringing them down on Sakura's stomach. Sakura groans and her legs loosen enough for Viper to get out of the leg lock. Viper staggers away, but not far as Janus pulls on the chain bringing Viper near her. Lesley is taken by surprised and is jerked toward Janus. She puts her shoulder down and rams Janus' belly with it. Janus groans and doubles over. Viper is able to jerk the chain out of Janus' hand. She lashes Janus with it a couple of time on the head with the chain. Blood begins to spurt from a cut on Janus' head.)
Kenny: this is unbelievable. Viper has forced Sakura and Janus to handcuff themselves to the guard rail is now going to whip Janus until she is dead with a chain.
Cari: You got to love that Viper.
Kenny: The ref ought to end this match now. Viper should be Dqed.
Cari: This is hardcore rules. There are no Dqs.
(The crowd boos Viper as she sneers at them. She walks back to little Kevin, still chained to the ring post. She says something to him that is not picked up by the mics. Kevin turns pale and begins to cry out loud. The crowd boos this cruelty and Viper just laughs as she goes back to Janus. Viper grabs Janus' head and pulls it back so that everyone can see how much she is bleeding. Viper releases Janus' head just in time to duck a punch thrown by Janus. Viper steps back and whips Janus with the chain, this time across the ribs. Janus howls in pain. Viper reacts to the booing of the crowd by spitting toward them. She swings the chain back preparing to whip Janus again when the sound system comes alive with Lead Zeppelins' "Immigrant song".)
Kenny: Isn't this Lindsey's entrance music?
Cari: I hope not. She would only spoil a good thing.
(Viper turns toward the entrance to see what is going on. She is standing too close to Janus, who reaches out and grabs the chain away from A surprised Viper. Lesley turns just in time to see the chain lashing toward her. It strikes her across the face causing her to drop to her knees. Janus strikes out again with the chain, whipping it across Viper's back. Lesley manages to scramble out of range of any further attacks. Lindsey Locke suddenly appears at the entrance to the arena. The crowd goes wild, cheering on one of their favorites. Lindsey runs toward Viper and hits her with a drop kick, sending Viper toward Janus, who strikes her with the chain.)
Cari: Hey No fair! The ref should DQ Lindsey and the others for ganging up on Viper.
Kenny: It's a hardcore rules match. There are no Dqs.
Cari: That doesn't make it fair.
( Viper runs around the side of the ring, getting away from Janus as Lindsey gives chase. Lesley slides into the ring and is followed by Locke. Something occurs to Lynette LABRie and signals for the time keeper to ring the bell.)
Cari: Is Lynette ending the match?
Kenny: No she is finally starting it.
Cari: Well, just like that we have a one on one match.
Kenny: What do you mean? Sakura and Janus are still in the match.
Cari: I don't think they will be getting out of those handcuffs soon.
(Sakura and Janus struggle to find a way to get free from the handcuffs as Lindsey and Viper circle each other in the ring. Lindsey looks pretty bad from the beating she has gotten earlier from Viper. Viper doesn't look a whole better with welts on her face and back from the chain and Janus' fist. Viper Grabs Lindsey's wrist and whips her into the ropes. Viper extends an arm to clothesline Locke, but she ducks and continues across the ring. Lesley turns in time to see Locke rebound off the ropes and leap into the air. Locke drives both feet into Viper's stomach with a drop kick. Viper land on her rump, hard on the mat. Lindsey gets behind Viper and wraps her arms around Viper's waist. With a grunt, she lifts Viper off the mat and sands her crashing back to it with a belly to back suplex. Never releasing the hold, Locke again takes Viper up and down with another belly to back suplex. Locke tries it again but Viper sends an elbow into Lindsey's ribs that cause her to break the hold. Both wrestlers get quickly to their feet.)
Kenny: A surprising show of strength by Lindsey.
Cari: I am surprised she showed anything for this match.
(Lindsey runs to the ropes and springboards off the second one. She flips in the air and wraps her legs around Viper's head. She sends Viper crashing to the mat with a Hurricanranna. Lindsey is quick to her feet while Viper is a little slower. Lindsey again runs to the rope and spring boards off the second one. She leaps in the air and hits Viper with a flying cross body block. Viper surprises Locke and most of the crowd by catching Lindsey and holding her for a second before dropping her across her knee with a back breaker. Lesley increases Locke's pain by pressing down on her chin and thigh, forcing Lindsey's back to bend well past the normal position. Lynette LaBrie checks the hold and declares it to a choke. Viper can't believe this and refuses to break the hold. The ref begins to count. At the count of four, Viper pushes Lindsey off her knee. Lynette gets in Viper's face yelling at her about the rules. She keeps forcing Viper to back away from her.)
Kenny: It almost looks like Labrie is trying to get Viper to hit her.
Cari: Oh my God! That is exactly what she is trying to do. If Viper touches the ref, Viper will lose her Fallen Angel belt.
Kenny: I don't know who is slimier, Johnny Angle or Viper.
Cari: It's definitely Johnny Angel.
(Viper manages to get around Labrie and to Locke, who has gotten to her feet and is trying to rub her back. Viper grabs her arm and whips her toward the corner. Lindsey manages to reverse the move and sends Viper crashing into the corner. Locke follows Viper into the corner. But Viper grabs the top rope and lifts herself of the mat. Lindsey crashes into the turnbuckle as Viper lands on the mat behind her. Viper wraps her arms around Lindsey's waist and lifts her into the air. She brings Lindsey down across her outstretched knee in an atomic drop. Lindsey falls to the mat, curling into the fetal position, clutching her nether regions.)
Kenny: It looks like Labrie is yelling at Viper over something. Perhaps the low blow.
Cari: HEY REF! THIS IS A HARDCORE RULES MATCH! YOU MORON!
Kenny: Well, that put her in her place.
(Viper ignores the ref and brings Lindsey to her feet by means of a handful of hair. Lindsey is still doubled over from the effects of the atomic drop. Viper forces Lindsey's head between her thighs. She wraps her arms between Lindsey's legs and lifts until Lindsey is upside down in the air. Viper then sits down, driving Lindsey's head into the mat with a cradle pile driver.)
Kenny: A brutal cradle pile driver by Viper. Lindsey looks like she is out of it.
Cari: Viper again proves why she is the greatest wrestler in the world. Against all the odds that Johnny stacked against her, she is going to win this match.
Kenny: Hey Look! Something fell out of Viper's back pocket when she did that pile driver. It's a foreign object! Disqualify her ref!
Cari: This is a hardcore match. Foreign objects are allowed.
Kenny: I wonder what that is.
Cari: It looks like a set of small keys.
Kenny: Oh My God! It's the keys to the handcuffs.
(Neither Viper nor Lindsey see the keys laying on the mat. Viper covers Lindsey with a lateral press. While Viper is on top of Lindsey, Lynette grabs Lindsey's foot and places it on the bottom rope. She taps Viper on the shoulder and points to the foot. Viper furiously slams her hand on the mat before raising to her feet. Viper scoops Lindsey up and slams her to the mat on topo of the keys. Sakura and Janus begin to yell at Lindsey to throw them the keys. Lynette gets in Viper's face and begins yelling at her again. Lindsey lies on the mat unmoving.)
Cari: What could Lynette be yelling at Viper about?
Kenny: I don't know, but she looks like she is really trying to antagonize Viper.
Cari: Whatever she said seems to be working. Viper cocks her fist, ready to punch.
Kenny: Lynette seems to be daring Viper to hit her.
Cari: Viper wises up and lowers her fist. This Labrie ought to be thrown out of the federation.
(While Lynette and Leslie are arguing, Lindsey realizes that the keys to the cuffs are underneath her. She grabs them and tosses them to Sakura just as Viper grabs her by the arm and forces her to her feet. Sakura unlocks the cuff holding her and jumps onto the ring apron. Viper spins and whips Lindsey, not realizing that Sakura is free. Locke hits the corner right in front of Sakura and Sakura reaches out and taps Lindsey's shoulder. The ref signals that a tag has been made. The crowd roars as Sakura leaps over the ropes and runs at a startled Viper. Ito leaps and hits Viper with a drop kick that sends her crashing to the floor. Janus runs into the ring and Labrie makes no effort to atop her. Janus picks Viper up and slams her onto the mat. Ito runs to the ropes and springboards off the second one to deliver a guillotine leg drop across Viper's throat.)
Cari: There are too many people in the ring. The ref should force Janus out of it until Viper tags her.
Kenny: Labrie doesn't seem to know what to do. She's just standing there watching.
(Janus forces Viper to her feet and slings her into the ropes. On the rebound, Lynette Labrie walks into the path of Viper and Viper runs into her. Although she tried to avoid her, Viper brushes up against Labrie. The ref drops to the mat as though she was hit by a ten-ton tuck.)
Cari: O NO! Viper just touched Labrie. I know she and Johnny are going to use that as an excuse to take the Fallen Angel Belt away from Viper.
Kenny: I may not like Viper, but that is dirty dealing if they take away Viper's title because of that.
(The ref continues to lie on the mat. As Janus grabs Viper by the throat and choke slams her to the mat. Janus whispers something to Sakura who nods her head. Sakura gets behind Viper, raising her up on her shoulders, while tagging in Lindsey, who mounts the top rope, making a V-sign with her arms out toward the crowd, then finishes off the opponent with a flying body splash from the elevated position.)
Kenny: A Storm Front. Thunder and Lightening's finisher. It's all over for Viper.
Cari: This is so unfair.
Kenny: And threatening a young child with death, forcing two of the wrestlers to be handcuffed to the guard rail and Pearl Harboring an opponent is fair?
Cari: That's why Viper should win. She had such a great plan.
(Lindsey covers Viper as the ref drops to the mat. The three count is a formality. Labrei raises Lindsey and Sakura's hands in the air. Janus ignores the others and takes a fork out of her boot.)
Cari: Oh No! Janus has one of those Super Stainless Steel forks. She is attacking Viper with it.
Kenny: There is no love lost between these two.
(Janus jabs the fork in Viper's forehead causing blood to flow. She jabs her three more times before Sakura goes to her and convinces Janus to stop. Lindsey goes to Kevin and releases him from his cuffs. Kevin is returned to the grateful arms of his loving mother, Angela Downey. The crowd cheers as the ring announcer says "The winners Lindsey Locke and Sakura Ito, THUNDER AND LIGHTENING." The threesome leaves the arena to the roar of the crowd. Viper gets to her feet slowly and wipes the blood from her eyes. She walks to her corner to pick up her Fallen Angel Belt but Lynette beats her to it. Labrie grabs the belt and holds it away from Viper.)
Lynette: Viper, you know the rules. If you touched an official of BRA, you would forfeit your title belt. You purposely ran into me, therefore you are no longer the Fallen Angel Title holder. Johnny Angel will put the belt up for grabs on the next card with a match between two wrestlers of his choosing.
(Viper begins to attack Labrie. Lynette manages to get under the ropes and run toward the back of the arena. Suddenly "Alzo Spract Zarathustra" begins to play over the speaker system. Lynette is looking back as she runs and runs right into the arms of a tall man wearing white robes and black mask that covers his face. No one can tell anything about this man because he is completely covered. He grabs the belt from Labrie and walks toward the ring.)
Cari: Who is this freak?
Kenny: It's Gabrielle. The person that is trying to replace Johnny Angel as commissioner of BRA.
(Gabrielle walks solemnly into the ring. Viper has stayed in the ring nursing her wounds from tonight's match.)
Gabrielle: Hark the Herald Angel Sings. Viper, I return this belt to you as the rightful holder of the honorable position of Fallen Angel.
Cari: YES! There really are angels!
(The angeltron comes alive and shows a seen back stage in Johnny Angels room. He and his cronies are trying to push open the door but something is holding it in place. The camera angle changes to show that a fork lift is backed against the door preventing anyone from opening it. The shouts of Johnny and his friends can be heard as they pound on the door.)
Cari: Someone parked a ten-ton forklift against the door to Johnny's room. He'll never be able to get out to take the belt away from Viper.
Kenny: I wonder who that someone is.
(The scene shifts back into the arena.)
Gabrielle: Viper, I have shown you my favor tonight. Perhaps you can show me your favor when it comes time to vote on the new commissioner.
(Gabrielle leaves the arena to the thunderous applause of the crowd.)
The winners: Thunder and Lightening, SAKURA ITO AND LINDSEY LOCKE. Viper retains her Fallen Angel Title.