Porsha Pembroke vs Sweet Melissa Shared
(Another Monday night and another capacity crowd has gathered to see the greatest talents in women's professional wrestling go at it in the BRA. As the cameras pan down the fans, they let loose a roar and a cheer, eager for the next match, waving out the ever-present signs and banners, reading everything from 'Gabrielle Stole the Belt!' (which, oddly enough, disappears a short time later), 'Watch out for the Voodoo!', and 'Angel Dust is My Drug!'. After one last pan, the camera settles on the ever-faithful announcing crew of Kenny Harbours and Cari 'the Brat' Trammel.)
Kenny: Welcome back, fans, to another fantastic Battling Ring Angels show! Never to keep the action down, our next match features two very different wrestlers.
Cari: You can say that again! On one hand, you've got Porsha Pembroke. A monster among women . . . I bet she could snap most of the girls in this federation apart with her teeth. Not to mention she's part of the Hit Squad now.
Kenny: But she's up against Lindsay Locke! Not only one of the most dynamic and exciting wrestlers we've seen in a long time, but also a former Celestial champion . . .
Cari: Normally, this is where I would be protesting your ideas, but Locke has started to impress me some. Did you here how she stuffed Shea London a few days ago? Now that's the kind of attitude I like to see . . .
Kenny: *grumble* I don't know about that . . . anyways, here comes Porsha!
(Without warning, smoke starts to gather at the head of the entrance. The smoke gets thick and almost obscures the area, save for the backlighting. As several oddly shaped shadows appear behind the wall of smoke, 'Mississippi Queen' from Mountain booms across the arena speakers. The first to appear is the minuscule Paula Pembroke, clutching a cigarette in her hand. Behind her walks Jessica Estrella, her Hit Squad companion. Lastly, the gigantic Porsha Pembroke appears. The giant is dressed in riding kit, black riding pants tucked at the ankles into heavy black riding boots. She wears a white blouse and her dark hair is pulled straight back. She walks slowly and with purpose, just a few steps behind her sister. The huge woman crests the ring steps and climbs over the top rope into the ring. She eyes the crowd and looks ominous. She regards her sister, who offers last minute instructions. Jessica looks on as Porsha turns and stands ready for the match.)
Kenny: Porsha is backed up both by her sister Paula and Jessica Estrella . . . she's gotten very spooky, if you ask me.
Cari: You just have no open mind to other religions, geek boy. Now, next out is Lightning Lindsay Locke . . .
Kenny: *touching his ear piece and consulting his computer* What??
Cari: What is it? Tell me, nerd boy, or else . . .
(As if in response to that question, as the fans prepare for the entrance of Lightning Lindsay Locke, they are stunned to see Angela Downey walking to the ring alone. No music or fanfare announces her entrance. She wears faded blue jeans and a "Threesome" T-shirt. Her dirty blond hair is loose and her small wire rimmed glasses sit on the bridge of her nose. She holds a microphone in her left hand. She enters the ring, climbing through the ropes. A look of concern on her face.) Angela: I'm sorry, I just got off the phone with Lindsay and she will be unable to make it tonight.
(The fans stir and murmuring can be heard. They had been excited about seeing one of the fan favorites of BRA and many wondered if she was all right.)
Angela: Lindsay's car broke down on the highway as she was coming the arena and it took too long for the tow truck to arrive. She was hoping she would still be able to make it, but right now that seems like it's not going to happen.
(The fans seem satisfied with that explanation. It is unlike Lindsay to miss a match and she must not be able to make it.)
Angela: Lindsay has made arrangements with another wrestler to take her place in this match. Thank you, and Lindsay is very sorry to let her fans down.
(As Angela leaves the ring, the fans still seem stunned and wait to find out who Lindsay's replacement will be.)
Kenny: Oh my! I hope Lindsay's alright!
Cari: *scowls* Just when I was thinking better of her, Locke chickens out!
Kenny: I doubt it had to do with fear . . . Lindsay's faced the likes of Viper in the Hardcore ring and never backed down.
Cari: But that's a mountain in there!
(Porsha looks confused by this development, as if not sure what to do. Paula hops up to the ring rope (with a considerable effort) and starts to explain the situation to her sister.)
Kenny: I just wonder who her replacement is? Sakura Ito? Janus?
Cari: I hope not . . . both of them have serious matches of their own tonight. Of course, a buck-passer like Locke probably doesn't care.
Kenny: I think we're about to find out . . .
("Hit Me Baby One More Time" by Brittany Spears starts to play on the large arena speakers. Before people can get their bearings, Sweet Melissa Shared comes charging out from behind the curtain and jog briskly to the ring. Melissa smiles cutely for the fans. Melissa wears orange and aqua Lycra shorts and top, covered by a T shirt that says "California High School Swimming Champs." She wears orange boots and orange knee pads. Her blond hair is loose. She slowly gets into the ring, sliding between the second and top rope and waves for the fans. She shifts nervously and waits for the match to start.)
Cari: No . . . no way.
Kenny: Lindsay Locke has gotten 'Sweet' Melissa Shared to take her place in this match! Shared was practically murdered the last time these two fought, though no thanks to Estrella, who is hovering by ring-side, a perverse grin on her lips.
Cari: Well, time for me to go to sleep. This won't last long . . .
(Porsha grins broadly at the nervously shifting Melissa, who glances at her giant opponent with a mix of fear and trepidation. The referee, the crooked Lynette LeBrie, casually glances between the two wrestlers and motions for the bell without a side glance, making to place herself as far from the action as possible.)
Kenny: And there's the bell . . . Porsha is lumbering out after Sweet Melissa . . . she better have some sort of plan or this will be ugly.
Cari: That pinhead have a plan? You must be kidding.
(Melissa's 'deer-in-the-headlights' stare seems to break just as Porsha reaches her, throwing out one of those giant arms to cuff the young woman. At the last moment, Melissa dives off to the side, leaving the giant arm sending a WHOOSH of air as it sweeps by.)
Kenny: I'd say Melissa is opting for the defensive. A strategy that has a 172% chance better of success than going toe-to-toe with Porsha.
Cari: I'll agree with that, but I still don't think it's going to work.
(Melissa rolls back to her feet, casts a back glance at Porsha, then seems to flee like an ant before the towering Pembroke sister. Ducking a huge slap that may have knocked her blonde head clean off, Shared charges to the ropes, rebounding before the lumbering giant can react, and springs up into a flying dropkick, which smacks into Porsha's chest with a meaty thwack.)
Kenny: Clean hit with the dropkick, but Porsha isn't down!
Cari: It takes more than that to knock down that giant! (Shared is about to hop back up from the dropkick, but Porsha, barely affected by the kick, is right there and grabs each of the Sweet One's ankles in one meaty paw. Melissa's eyes tremble as Porsha spreads her legs and flings one giant boot down between her legs in a low blow. Shared *shrieks* in pain, eyes watering up, while LeBrie leans casually against the ropes.)
Cari: Well, Shared isn't going to be having a baby anytime soon . . . she might not be able to walk period . . .
Kenny: I must admit, I'm still amazed by the power Porsha has . . . I just can not wait to see her matched against some of the other resident BRA powerhouses, like Alexandria Parker or Sakura Ito.
(Melissa balls up in a fetal position, trying to coax her body to work again. Porsha raises her arms and bellows at the crowd, who throw up a chorus of boos while her smaller sister points at Melissa and tells her to finish off the trash.)
Cari: I think this is already over . . . Porsha bends over to pick up Shared . . .
Kenny: . . . who rolls out of the way! I think that may have been pure survival instincts there!
Cari: She'll need those instincts to have a chance to live, that's for sure!
(Porsha looks confused and disappointed for a moment as Shared rolls from her grasp, then steps foward to lay in a HUGE stomp, which Shared also rolls away from. The Sweet One continues to roll, like a pillbug, away from her giant tormentor, who continues to give chase, untill Melissa tumbles from the ring on the neutral side.)
Kenny: Ouch! Rough landing!
Cari: But ten times better than what Porsha would have done to her . . . the hit seems to have at least knocked a little sense back *into* her. Why she agreed to do this for Locke I don't know. Must be a masochist.
(The hit on the padded concrete seems to have shocked Shared back to semi-consciousness as she picks herself up aided by the ring apron. Porsha begins to weave herself through the ring ropes to finish off the young Californa girl, as Estrelle slowly creeps her way around the ring the other way.)
Kenny: Shared better look out, or she's going to get sandwhiched by her former tag team partner and the giant . . .
Cari: This'll get ugly . . .
(Melissa looks over as Porsha hops to the ground with a THUD and takes a deep breath . . . before the giant can react, Melissa makes her one shot at offense, shoving off from the ring apron and . . . )
Kenny: Oh my God! The Sweet One has shoved off the ropes and landed a HUGE Superkick right in Porsha's chest! I think that was the Shared Experience, folks!
(Porsha gasps for a moment and staggers back from the impact, actually falling to her butt from the impact. Shared herself staggers foward, almost in amazement over the success of her attack. That success, however, is short lived as Jessica sneaks up behind her . . . )
Kenny: Turn around, Melissa, turn around!!
Cari: Too late!! Estrella leaps up and . . . OUCH! . . . Reverse Hurricana!! Bye-bye melon!
(Shared's blonde head is smashed into the hard floor by the surprise attack of the Voodoo woman, with nary a comment by the referee. LeBrie seems perfectly content staying out of this Hardcore match, probably for her own safety. Porsha gets back to her feet, now looking genuinely angry.)
Kenny: I can't watch!
Cari: I certainly can . . . uh oh . . . looks like the Mexican announcer's table is getting targeted again . . . our friends from south of the Border have lost their table as Porsha hefts the whole thing and . . . oh my . . .
(Porsha, with a loud grunt, literally drops the entire table on Melissa's prone form, making a wet sort of impact as the table splits, eliciting another loud shriek from the Californa girl. Reaching through the debris, Porsha collars the practically unconscious girl and tosses her through the ring ropes.)
Kenny: *peaking out through his fingers* This doesn't look good for the Sweet One . . . in fact, it looks very bad.
Cari: I thought you weren't going to look . . . well . . . you're right there . . .
(As Cari speaks, Porsha hefts up the Sweet One like so much dead weight , hauling her up high over her head and then DOWN, with a tremendous ring-shaking impact as she delivers the Iron Lung!)
Kenny: The ring is still shaking and . . . oh no! Not another one!
(True to words, again the wounded Shared gets hauled back up and back DOWN, threatening to shake the ring apart as Porsha slams her down in another Iron Lung. Paula lets out a throaty laugh, smoke escaping her lips before she breaks into a coughing fit.)
Kenny: I hope she just pins her now and lets the EMTs look at her.
Cari: I think Porsha may be done now . . . look.
(Porsha, with one last growl, raises up her huge foot and stomps it down, right on Melissa's chest, her foot almost as large as the girl's torso. The Sweet One shudders one last time from the blow, then falls back, totally out of it. LeBrie pushes herself off the ropes and lazily drops down, slapping the mat three times in boredom, then calling for the bell.)
Kenny: Get those EMTs in there! That's got to be serious damage!
Cari: Aww, isn't that nice? Porsha I think is going to deliver her personally . . .
(As the EMTs begin to come down, Porsha picks up the spritely girl off the mat, easily pressing her over her head. Shared flutters to half-consciousness at this and looks in total fear suspended over the giant Pembroke's head, just before Porsha flings her outside of the ring, landing in front of the startled EMTs with a loud THUD!)
Kenny: Dear Lord! Can anyone bring down this monster???
Cari: Probably not . . . but it will be fun to see the damage as they try!
WINNER: Porsha Pembroke, by pinfall.