Sandra: Welcome back ladies and gentlemen. This match is a rematch from last month, featuring
Princess Peg Christian and Yvette Malreaux.
Princess Peg Christian and Yvette Malreaux
Garry: That's Marquise Yvette DeSade Malreaux to low born peasants like you.
Only the favored few, like me, can call her Yvette.
Sandra: If your one of the favored few, I'm glad I'm one of the disfavored
masses. All that needs to be said about the evilness of Yvette is that you are
her friend.
Garry: Jealous aren't you. I was just at a wonderful party at her castle. I was
dancing with the most beautiful women in BRA. After that . . . well, lets just
say that little Gary got a dance or two too.
Sandra: I think I'm going to be sick. I knew the Sisterhood was slime, but I
didn't think they were desperate.
Garry: You wouldn't know a real man if he was sitting next to you.
Sandra: (Changing the subject) The event's at last week's Naughty or Nice PPV
are going to have an effect on this match. Yvette won the TV title by beating
Sweet Misty in a hell in a cell match.
Garry: She didn't just beat her, she left Misty a quivering mass of hurt.
Sandra: Somehow I don't remember it that way. But anyway she is now the TV
champion of BRA. Princess Peg was in three matches, and I think she may not have
recovered from them in one week time.
Garry: Peg's head swelled to the size her belly after a few good showings and
she bit off more than she could chew, as impossible as that sounds. The Marquise
will win this match in under five minutes.
Sandra: Don't count the Peg out. I think the match will be close. Peg has a lot
of heart
Garry: and a lot of stomach and a lot of thigh and a lot of . . .
(Slap)
Sandra Don't say it. Here comes Peg now.
(The curtain parts as "She's a Lady" bursts out and one of the BRA's fan
favourites emerges from the back! Peggy Christian walks slowly out, her full
length floral kimono brushing her legs as she approaches the ring. The crowd is
cheering for her wildly. But her normal nervous smile is not there! Instead, a
different look . . . like one of dread almost lines her face. She reaches up to
the waiting hands, brushing as many as she can on her way to the steps, but the
bright eyed determined woman of only a week ago is missing. As she steps through
the ropes she pauses, like she is fighting pain.)
Garry: Look at that pathetic woman. She's beaten already and she knows it. She
should forfeit right now.
Sandra: Don't count her out yet. But I have to admit, she doesn't look like
she's fully recovered from last week.
(Getting up, she carefully removes her robe, revealing her attire of soft pink
one piece suit, black tights and black soft leather wrestling boots, and hands
it to the attendant.)
Garry: And now we'll see some real class. The winner of this match, Marquise
Yvette DeSade Malreaux.
(The first few bars of the French National Anthem play, then it is suddenly cut
off. The lights go out and explosions, fireballs and spotlights go swirling.
The
Angeltron shows scenes of terrorism, violence, sex, and explosions, followed by
the Lords of Acid's �Out Comes the Evil.' Yvette appears from the curtains,
clad in her white S&M style outfit with white crop and cape, then throws her
head back, laughs and extends both arms, forming a �Y' (for �Yvette, of course).
She is then followed by Merci, Kayla, and Misty. The group arrogantly struts to
the ring. Merci sits on the second rope, allowing Yvette to make a graceful
entrance to the ring. The ring announcer hand Yvette a microphone.)
"There are so many pretenders running rampant in this federation. The
pretenders in the federation, however, are nothing compared to the simpletons
who come to these matches. They are nothing more than blue collared,
uneducated, simpleminded, yokels, without the foggiest notion of fair play and
respect. They cheer for individuals who lie and cheat and trick. The fans may
fear and loathe me but it is better to be feared than loved. I will accept the
trade-off any day."
"What truly galls me is the fact that certain individuals, while getting cheers
from the fans, perform tactics as bad or worse than individuals such as myself.
At least I make no effort to hide my tactics or viciousness. If I cheat, well,
it is to be
expected. Certain individuals do so but the fans seem to think that it is
justifiable. Ah, well, such is life. I hate to admit it, but at least Peggy
Christian is someone whom I can . . . respect, because she is as honest as she
claims to be, rather than bow to the �double standard' accepted by the mindless
fans."
"For once in my life, Peggy, I feel some pity. That pity is for you. You have
caught me on a rather special occasion. It is rare that I feel such sympathy
toward another human being. Perhaps it is because I now see you as less
repulsive as some of those nitwits and cheats you associate yourself with. Am I
evil? Perhaps. However, at least I make no effort to hide it . . . "
(Yvette throws the microphone down and walks to her corner.)
Ding! Ding ! Ding!
Sandra: The match starts as Yvette and Princess Peg lock up in the center of the
ring.
Yvette: "I beat you once before. What makes you think you will beat me now?"
Garry: The Marquise shows her dominance as she pushes Peg into the corner. A
couple of punches to the Housewife's chest followed by an Irish Whip by the
Marquise.
(Peg rebounds off the ropes and is nailed by a savate kick to the stomach. Peg
lets out a low groan as Yvette puts her in a front headlock and falls backward
driving Peg's head into the mat.
Garry: Beautiful DDT by the Marquise. This match may be over now as Yvette rolls
Peggy over and goes for a pin.
Sandra: Peg is really showing the effects of last weeks matches. Yvette is just
pressing down with one hand! Shoulder up on the count of one by Peg. She won't
be that easy to pin.
Garry: Yvette was just giving Peg a chance to get off easy. She didn't hook
Peg's leg. Yvette doesn't want to hurt the old lady too badly.
Sandra: Yeah, right. She was just showing off for the fans. She was trying to
embarrass Peg with such a lazy pin attempt.
(Both wrestlers get to their feet. Yvette sneers at Peg "You are merely wasting
my time and yours!" Peg looks angry at this. Yvette moves in with a quick jab
to Pegs ribs. Peg takes the blow and wraps her arms around a surprised Yvette.
Peg lifts the Marquise off the mat with a bear hug, which has both Yvette's arms
trapped. Peg leaps forward unto the mat keeping the Marquise in the bear hug.
Yvette lands on the mat with Peg on top of her. The air is forced out of
Yvette's lungs with a gasp. Peg puts her knees on Yvette's shoulders in a school
girl pin. The ref drops to the mat.)
One
Two
(Kayla points to Yvette's foot on the ropes. The ref stops the count and Peg
releases the pin.)
Sandra: Kayla put Yvette's foot on the ropes. Peg was just cheated out of a win.
Garry: What are you talking about? I didn't see anything.
Sandra: Your eyesight qualifies you to be a referee.
Garry: The ref is doing a fine job.
(Peg steps back to catch her breath as Yvette uses the ropes to get to her feet.
Peg rushes Yvette but runs straight into a savate kick to the stomach. Peg
squeals and doubles over. Yvette puts the Prairie Princess into a headlock and
runs toward the corner. Peg's head is rammed into the turnbuckle. Yvette changes
her grip on Peg's head and begins to beat Peg's head into the turnbuckle.)
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
(The Marquise smiles and releases Peg's head. Yvette walks to the center of the
ring as Peg stumbles around the ring trying to regain her bearings.)
Garry: Peg is stumbling around like a drunken sailor. Something Peg is familiar
with. I believe the fathers of her children were all drunken sailors.
(Slap! Slap! Slap! Slap!)
Sandra: Don't you ever say anything like that again about Peg or her family.
Garry: What is this? Censorship?
(Slap)
(Peg continues to stagger as Yvette walks up to her and sneers "You are as
worthless as a check from Grinnan Barret!" Yvette wraps her arms around Peg and
executes a belly to belly brain buster. Peg lies on the mat not moving.)
Garry: (singing) The party's over . . .
(Slap)
Sandra How many times have I told you to stop making that awful noise? It sounds
like someone . . . What's this? Someone has entered the ring area from the crowd
and has just hit Merci, the Marquise valet. Merci drops to the floor like a wet
towel.
Garry: Who would do something like that to a wonderful person like Merci?
(The unknown woman is wearing cut-off jeans, a black T-shirt with L.A. Bitch and
combat boots. Misty turns in surprise to the attacker and is met by a fist to
the forehead that lays her out.)
Sandra: It's . . . it's that new wrestler. L. A. Bitch! The one that's calling
all the wrestlers names.
Garry: Well at least she did something right, nailing Sherry's flavor of the
month. I wonder if "sweet" Misty will cry after that.
Sandra: Oh! No! That L. A. Bitch is wearing brass knuckles in her right fist. No
wonder she was able to knock out Merci and Misty with one punch.
(Kayla, who was on the far side of the ring runs to the Bitch and begins trading
punches. Kayla sees the brass knuckles and has grabbed L. A. Bitch's right arm
to prevent her from using them as she punches Qa's stomach and face with her
left. Qa is getting punches in with her left too.)
(In the ring Yvette has rolled the nearly unconscious Peg unto her back. Yvette
hooks leg and has Peg pinned to the mat with a matchbook pin. There is no count.
Yvette looks around for the ref. The ref is too busy watching the action outside
the ring. He is screaming at Qa to leave the ring area. Yvette slaps the mat
five times to show that she has pinned Peg. In frustration she releases Peg and
jumps up. She spins the ref around to point to Peg She is screaming at him to
pay attention to the match. Yvette looks outside the ring and sees Merci and
Misty lying on the floor and Kayla and Qa going at it. She is about to leave
things in Kayla's competent hands when she sees Qa break free of Kayla. Qa
punches Kayla in the gut with her brass knuckle cover fist. Kayla moans and
doubles over. Yvette scrambles to the top turnbuckle just as Qa lands a European
upper cut to Kayla's face, opening a gash on Kayla's cheek and sending her
crashing to the concrete floor. The Marquise leaps off the turnbuckle and
delivers a missile drop kick to Qa, slamming her into the railing. Yvette jumps
to her feet and places Qa in a head lock. Yvette rams Qa's head into the guard
rail. Yvette steps back and does it again. Opening a cut on Qa's head.)
(Merci has regained her senses and sees what is going on. She runs to the
announcer's table.)
Merci: (To Sandra) Pardon est moi!
Sandra: What are you do . . .
(Sandra is stunned by Merci pulling her chair out from under her and dumping
Sandra on the floor. Merci runs with the chair toward Yvette and Qa. Garry
breaks out laughing as Sandra is splayed out on the floor, her feet in the air
dress to her waist. Sandra gets to her feet and tries to smooth her skirt.)
Sandra: Well! I have never been treated like that before!
Garry: Neither have I. And I hope I never see a sight like that again. I can't
believe a woman your age still wears Winnie the Poo underpants.
(Slap)
(Yvette turns Qa around and places Qa's head between her thighs. Yvette wraps
her arms around Qa's waist and lifts her up. Qa is quickly sent crashing to the
concrete floor with a power bomb. Yvette twists and drops an elbow to the crotch
of the stunned intruder. Qa screams in agony as she jerks up into a sitting
position. Yvette proceeds to rain continual punches on Qa's head opening the cut
up further. Qa's eyes are watering from the pain.)
(Back in the ring, Peg has slowly and painfully gotten to her feet. The ref
continues to watch the action outside the ring. He yells at Yvette to get back
in the ring. Peg goes to the ref. She is saying something and waiving her hand,
counting with her fingers. The ref nods his head yes and begins to count Yvette
out.)
Garry: Nice combinations move by the Marquise. That should keep that tramp from
interfering in a real wrestler's match.
Sandra: As much as I disapprove of such things, I believe that the Qa deserved
that low blow.
Garry: Yvette better get back in the ring, the ref is counting her out, but the
Marquise is reading the riot act to Qa. I think she won't bother that gracious
lady again. Yvette better watch out though, Qa still has those brass knuckles.
(Yvette stands over Qa screaming curses at her in French. Blood is poring from
the gash on Qa's head. Qa Punches quickly and lands her brass knuckled fist
right between Yvette's legs. The Marquise mouth drops open as she tries to
scream, but is unable to do so. Her eyes bug out of her head. She slowly sinks
to her knees with her hands going to her crotch.)
Sandra: Now that is not a very noble position for a Marquise to be in.
(Slap)
Sandra: (Rubbing her jaw) Ouch! Why did you do that?
Garry: Turn about is fair play.
(Merci raises the chair and brings it down on Qa's head. Qa tries to quickly
crawl away from the enraged Valet, but is hit across the back with the chair. Qa
staggers to her feet and runs toward the exit as Merci hits her over and over
again with the chair. They both exit the arena with Qa barely in front of the
chair wielding Merci.)
Garry: Good riddance to bad rubbish.
Sandra: That brass knuckled low blow has taken the French terror out of this
match. I think the ref will count her out he's already to 12 and Yvette isn't
moving.
Garry Come on, Kayla help the Marquise.
(As if on cue, Kayla helps Yvette to her feet. She leads the Marquise to the
ring apron. And gets her under the ropes just as the ref reaches 19. The ref
signals for the match to continue. Yvette lies on the mat in the fetal position.
Her voice returns as she moans and lets out a stream of creative French curses.
Peg grabs Yvette's arm and forces her to her feet. Peg whips Yvette into the
ropes and clothes lines her to the mat. Peg runs to the ropes and bounces off
them. She leaps into the air.)
Sandra: One French Pancake coming up. Don't they call them crepes?
Garry: Oh! No! Talk about being hit by a TON of bricks.
(Peg lands on Yvette with a loud thud. Both Peg and Yvette bounce off the mat,
with Peg coming down on Yvette again. Peg rolls Yvette up for the pin.)
One
Garry: This is so unfair, the Marquise had the match sown up, but that Bitch
ruined it.
Two
Sandra: What's Kayla doing? She's pulled Yvette's leg to the rope and is
shouting at the ref.
Garry: The ref sees Yvette's foot on the rope and stops the count. He taps Peg
on the shoulder and points to the foot. Peg gets off Yvette.
Sandra: That is the second time this match that Kayla put the French Terror's
foot on the rope. That's not very original.
Garry: But it is very effective.
(Peg grabs Yvette's foot off the rope. She pulls Yvette to the center of the
ring. She begins to twist Yvette into a figure four leg lock. Yvette strikes
quickly with her free leg, driving her foot into Peg's groin. Peggy screams in
agony as she releases Yvette's foot and staggers away. She falls to the mat and
rolls into a fetal position. She gently rocks back and forth. Yvette slowly gets
to her feet as the ref screams at her for the low blow. Yvette ignores the ref
as she stomps her feet on the mat, trying to remove the sting from her own sore
crotch.)
Sandra: Now that was uncalled for. That French Cheater should be disqualified
for that low blow.
Garry: I'm sure it was an accident. She was trying to avoid the figure four leg
lock. The Marquise is too classy a lady to purposely do something like that.
(Yvette walks to the prone Princess and begins to stomp on her. Peg tries to
roll away from the stomps but the toll of this match, combined with the
lingering effects from three matches last week have taken too much out of her.
Peg lies on the mat not resisting the stomps. Yvette climbs to the top
turnbuckle and signals the crowd. The crowd boos her heartily. She smiles at
them.)
Garry: Here it comes. Time for the Canadian Housewife to feel the French
Tickler.
Sandra: I can't watch. Poor Peg has been through too much. She's out of this
match. Can't that evil woman just pin her?
(The Marquise looks down at the badly beaten Princess. Her expression seems to
change. She looks outside the ring and sees that Misty is back on her feet.
Yvette looks once again at Peg and leaps off the top rope, coming down feet
first toward Peg.)
Garry: This aught to put that old lady out of wrestling for ever. Yvette is
doing a public service, getting rid of an old, fat wrestler. What the . . .
Sandra: I can't believe it.
Garry: Yvette has landed on the mat with both feet. She straddled Peg instead of
hitting her with that two footed stomp from the top rope. What was she thinking?
Sandra: Maybe she suddenly had compassion for someone.
Garry: No! I think something got in her eye. I'd hate to see the magnificent
Marquise change in any way.
Sandra: Yvette is bent over and she's saying something to Peg. Peg swings her
fist and connects to the Marquise nose. The Marquise is bleeding from the nose!
Garry: That Canadian cow has marred one of the most beautiful faces in BRA.
(The Marquise' head snap's back and her hands go to her injured nose. She
screams more French invective at Peg. The enraged Marquise pulls Peg to her feet
by her hair. Yvette then pounds Peg in the belly with a savate kick. Peg can
barely keep herself standing. Yvette puts Peg's head between her shapely thighs
and wraps her arms around Peg's waist. With a grunt Yvette lifts Peg in the air.
Yvette holds Peg there for a few seconds with one arm around Peg's waist. She
raises the other arm. The Marquise brings down her first between Peg's legs as
Yvette falls to her knees in a tombstone pile driver. Bringing Peg's head into
contact with the mat in sickening thud. Yvette releases Peg, who flops to the
mat on her back. The Marquise covers Peg as the ref counts to three. The ref
raises Yvette's arm in victory. Yvette shakes the ref off and raises both her
arms. She then clasps them over her head and walks arrogantly around the ring to
the thunderous boos of the crowd. Peg slowly begins to sit up, holding her neck.
Yvette walks to Peg.)
Sandra: That evil French witch is going to humiliate Peg by applying the
Bastille, like she has done to her other victims. This is truly uncalled for.
Get security in here. Where is the rest of the Body Shop? I can't believe they
will let this happen.
Garry: This is going to be fun.
Sandra: You're sick!
(Yvette walks proudly to the fallen Princess. Peg looks in terror at the
approaching Marquise. Yvette grabs Peg's hand and helps her to her feet. She
whispers something to Peg and then walks away from her. Yvette leaves the ring.
She walks up the ramp with her entourage as a surprised Peg looks on with
disbelief.)
Garry: See, I told you the Marquise is not a cruel woman.
Sandra: If I hadn't seen that with my own two eyes, I wouldn't have believed it.
It's time for a commercial, stay tuned for more great BRA action.
The Winner by pinfall: YVETTE MALREAUX