It's Inside My Sister's Lunch
Teacher: Isn't the book money due today?
James, Anita, Joe, Fay?
James: I left my money on the bus
When the patrols yelled at us to rush.
Anita: I have my money stowed away
In the jacket I wore yesterday.
Joe: My dad forgot to give me mine.
He forgets things all the time.
Fay: My money's lost, but I have a hunch;
It's inside my sister's lunch.
Teacher: Who brought their book money
here today? Erica, Doug, Rick, May?
Erica: Book money? What's it for?
You never told me this before.
Doug: I loaned my money to my friend Tom;
Then he gave it to his friend, John.
Rick: I've been sick with a ghastly flu;
I forgot the money was even due.
May: I remembered, but then I forgot
To take it from our money pot.
Teacher: Did anyone remember their money today? Mary Gerald, Susan, Ray?
Mary: Didn't I bring it yesterday?
Haven't I already paid?
Gerald: My money is up our climbing tree,
I left it there when I skinned my knee.
Susan: I used my money for lunch today,
It was the only way to pay.
Ray: My money's in my underwear drawer,
I'll remember to bring it tomorrow.
Teacher: No one remembered his money today?
Tim, Kathy, Jeffrey, Kay?
Tim: Here's my money in my sock!
All: The teacher passed out from shock.
From Kalli Dakos book, If You're Not Here, Please Raise Your Hand, 1995, Aladdin Paperbacks
Extension: This would be a wonderful performance piece for student assembly, a PTA or PTO meeting, or even some comic relief on a teachers' inservice day.
Two Eyes
Two eyes are buried
At the bottom
Of my bookbag.
I locked them
In a box
That looks like a coffin.
Then I covered it
Layer by
Sickening layer,
In two rolls
Of toilet paper
And placed
The horrid wad
In a black sock,
And hid it in
The deepest, darkest dungeon
Of my bookbag.
The eyes would have
Stayed there forever,
If only
My mother hadn't told
My teacher about them.
Mrs. Digby just asked
Me to read a sentence
From the blackboard,
And to tell her
If the commas
Are in the right place.
Commas?
I don't see any commas!
Now Mrs. Digby
Is making me
Pull out the black sock,
Unroll the coffin case,
Unlock the eyes,
Put them on
And become
FOUR EYES!
Wow! Mrs. Digby!
I didn't know
You had freckles
Just like me!
From Don't Read This Book, Whatever You Do: More Poems About School (1998) Aladdin Paperbacks
Extension: Talk to the students about glasses and the teasing that sometimes occurs towards someone that wears glasses. Glasses are cool tools, and show pictures of cool people who wear them: Bono, Harry Potter, Britney Spears, Clark Kent, President Bush, John Lennon, Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Elton John, & more. 1 in 5 children between the ages of 5 and 15 wear glasses.