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Jeff's Review of:
Meet Joe Black

1998, 2 hrs 58 min., Rated PG-13 for an accident scene, some sexuality and brief strong language. Dir: Martin Brest. Cast: Brad Pitt (Joe Black), Anthony Hopkins (Bill Parrish), Claire Forlani (Susan Parrish), Jake Weber (Drew), Jeffrey Tambor (Quince), Marcia Gay Harden (Allison Parrish).

NO Trailers again! If you remember, I didn't see any in front of The Siege either! Got a free pass, though. (It does pay to complain).

PLOT: In this remake/update of 1939's Death Takes a Holiday, Death comes to media mogul Bill Parrish (Hopkins) in the form of Brad Pitt, who assumes the name Joe Black. He decides to hang out at Bill's Manhattan mansion, kick back and learn what being human is all about.

I'm not sure if we're supposed to sympathize with death, but with Pitt the lead actor, my guess is yes. He's dumb some parts, inciteful in others; an evil blackmailer in one part, a sweet messenger into the afterlife in another.

The love scenes are great if you're a hopeless romantic. They're slow, deliberate and meaningful, and I'll admit beautifully filmed. But for a guy who's never been in love and has been a bachelor for awhile, it was too sappy and just made me cynical, not caring to see them anymore. Ask me again when I'm in a meaningful relationship.

The man getting run over by a car is about the most shocking scene I've witnessed on the big screen. It's haunting, even though I was expecting it, and cringed with a gasp and "Ooowwwwwwch."

The film clocks in at three hours, and does not move swiftly like a Bruckheimer picture. If you're someone who can't stand a movie with little to no action and mostly dialogue, then stay far away. There are lots of pregnant pauses (really, you could give birth in them). Meet Joe Black runs the viewer through all the emotions, and I've got to admit towards the end my eyes were welling up, which hasn't happened since Titanic. So twice in a year is a lot..what's going on with me?

Of course, the trembles went away quickly because the very end confused me. Who's who? What's what? Who's what? What's who? If you know, let me in on it. I read some critics who said it was unbelievable. Well, what do ya know! Death walking in human form IS believable?

Brad Pitt is dreamy. Oh, I'm sorry, but that's what those three Hallmark women kept insinuating two rows behind me. If I'd had some shampoo, I could've washed my hair in their drool. He is a good actor, and I'm sure way in the future he'll be one of "People" magazine's Most Beautiful People.

Forlani is what she's supposed to be, a pretty arm ornament for Mr. Pitt. She's good-looking in a weird sorta way, but it's not like I just discovered her, I enjoyed her more in Mallrats.

Hopkins, as always, is a film studio's dream to land for any part, because he brings an unparalleled amount of professionalism and dignity to a picture. He could play a hot dog vendor for 10 seconds and add something overall to a movie.

Quince (Tambor), you'll remember him as the sidekick on "The Larry Sanders Show" on HBO, is a very likeable guy. I can't see him playing a bad guy. He and Allison Parrish (Harden) make a cute couple, people you root for.

One detraction, there's as much spiritual exploration as every night on "Late Night With Conan O'Brien." There are a heck of a lot more questions I'd want to ask if Death showed up in my library (like, I have a library?).

I wouldn't say I left the theater uplifted and joyous. But I'll say that Meet Joe Black is thought-provoking, with solid dialogue (when they're not pausing to watch grass grow) and fine acting. But it gets melodramatic with this "ooh, ya gotta love man!" approach, while I find it difficult to believe Death could love, especially so quick when he knows not what it is. I said the same thing about Nicholas Cage in City of Angels. Looks more like lust to me, because love is more than sex, people!!!!!

The verdict: -- If you hate slow and get fidgety, stay away. But if you're a romantic and like dialogue and drool over Pitt, go see it.

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