So, the beginning of a new season and a new chapter in SBA FC football. After the not-shock retirement of Russ and Pete from team management/administration, the highly combustible baton of SBA supremity has been passed on to the humble authors of this page.
Kick-off was delayed, thanks to the usual havoc being wrought by Railtrack. When we did get the game underway, the SBA didn't look their best prepared, but still managed to get their noses in front thanks to an early penalty. "Cruncher" Beidas, forty-plenty years young, ran onto a well-placed through ball. The keeper, recognising danger, apprehended said Beidas with a sleeper hold and a series of short, brutal jabs to the head. The referee cried foul and John McCutcheon stroked home the consequent spot-kick, prompting great levity for the Sky Blues.
Showing, perhaps, a few signs of match rustiness, we came unhinged pretty quickly: the defence froze in clamorous appeal for a ball which might have left the field (probably, who knows, not me...) Reading correctly played to the whistle and the resultant ball into the danger zone was neatly converted by none other than the co-author of this page, Tiger Tim James, making his managerial debut at the back. Oopsy...
Reading were unlikely to give us another soft penalty, so we needed something quite special to get us back on track. Cue Mick Hibberd. The midfield hitman collected the ball on the edge of the opposition's penalty area, before slaloming through the opposing defence like John McCutch going through a bag of chips. A left-foot shot slipped 'twixt the ill-starred keeper's legs and we were back in front. A real boost seeing as Reading were mostly peppering our goal during this period, Pete was wearing out his gloves and we weren't using the ball as best we might.
Nonetheless, half-time arrived without further mishaps. As a precaution against further tomfoolerous own-goal boobery, Tim took himself off, giving Jonn Holmes' mate Scott an SBA debut.
We were content now to sit back and hit on the counter attack (ie, Reading had most of the ball) but we were given a two goal cushion- and a bit of a shock to boot- when Cross Ross collected the ball some twenty-five yards out and smashed a low, left foot shot past the keeper's left hand. This is not a typo, repeat, this is not a typo.
This bizarre twist of fate redoubled our determination to just doss about and hoof the ball up the pitch any time it came near us. Pete was pulling out all the stops in goal and he needed to: ferocious shots were being driven in from all angles, and The Startled Cat was really being put to the test.
It couldn't last forever: the ball dropped on the edge of our area, and one of the Reading lads delivered himself of a truly fearsome shot which hit the roof of the net before Pete had even seen it- which didn't, I might add, prevent him from going through the charade of attempting another acrobatic save; an effort sadly wasted, I fear.
It was too little, too late for the home side, however. The referee called proceedings to a halt and the Sky Blues emerged as 3-2 victors. Tough game, good result. Better still, we made some new friends: the Reading lads were spot on in their approach to the game throughout, hopefully we'll manage a return fixture later in the year. Good day out, good result for the City in the afternoon and by the time the authors of this page got off the train at Coventry, we were absolutely leathered, which we're hoping will be the defining feature of our new regime.
All that remains is our new match report feature, Shooters And Rooterstm! This week's shooter is Midfield Mick, who dribbled his way into SBA folklore (again) with a goal of outstanding clarity. The hapless rooter is none other than the co-author of this page, Tiger Tim, who managed to put the ball through his own net on his managerial debut. D'oh!