| A Total Eclipse Of The Heart |
| By Mattie Scott |
| Because of Mark's grandmother's passing, the USA tour was postponed until further notice. That gave the other members a chance to fly back to Ireland to be with their families for a short time. I was about to be on my way back to Toronto before Mark asked me to accompany him to his grandmother's funeral. "I need you with me, for support." He told me in a broken voice. His eyes were red and swollen from crying. He wouldn't let the other guys see him cry, only me. "You sure?" I checked him to make sure he was okay. Mark nodded. "Yeah, and besides, my grandmother liked you a lot." I smiled at him. "Okay. I'll come with you." ***** Dublin International Airport ***** Mark was silent throughout the whole plane ride. He wouldn't even eat his meal, no matter how much I tried to persuade him. Even the other guys tried to talk to him, but nothing worked. Shane, Kian, Mark and I took the train to Sligo while Bryan and Nicky remained in Dublin. They were scheduled to come to Sligo the next day for the funeral. "Michelle! It's lovely to see you!" Mark's mother kissed me on the cheek. "It has been a long time, you're right. I'm sorry about your loss." I told Mrs.Feehily. She nodded her head. "Yes, Mark's grandmother was very dear to him and of course, to us. How did he take the news?" Mrs.Feehily led me inside the living room while Mark went off with his brothers. "Not so good," I took a deep breath as I sat down on the sofa. "He has been very quiet lately. He hasn't been eating or sleeping well either." Mrs.Feehily sighed. "That's no surprise. Mark and his Nan were very close. I suppose we have to give him the space he needs." "Speaking of space, I think it would be a good idea for me to stay someplace else. Kian has offered to let me stay at his house." I suggested to Mark's mother. "Are you sure? You're welcome here." I shook my head. "I think he needs to be with his family. The tour was kind of getting to him too." "Alright dear. But you'll have to come over tomorrow. It would mean a lot to us, and Mark too." I smiled a little bit. "Okay, I'll do that. Meanwhile, Kian is waiting outside for me. Would you please tell Mark that I'll see him tomorrow?" Mrs.Feehily patted my hands. "Of course I will." She waved good-bye to me as Kian stood outside with his car out front. ***** Kian's house ***** "This is where you'll be staying." Kian opened the door to the spare guest room. I dropped my bags on the floor and tossed my jacket on a chair by the bed. The guest room had two twin sized beds and a bathroom. "Oh Michelle, um� Would you mind sharing this room with someone?" Kian asked me nervously. "Sure, why not?" I shrugged my shoulders. "Yeah well�. I wasn't sure if you were comfortable with this. But Nicky called me on my mobile while you were talking to Mark's mum. He said that his flat had termites and I told him he could stay with me, but I didn't know whether you were staying with me also." I faked a smile. "It's fine. We're cool with each other now." Kian grinned. "Okay, his train is coming in tonight in a couple of hours." ***** Meanwhile ***** "Mark, honey. Can I talk to you?" Mark saw his mother's head peek inside his room. "Yeah. Come in." He replied in a sad voice. Mark was sitting on his bed in the dark, thinking about his grandmother and all the memories that he became fond of. Mrs.Feehily sat down next to him on the bed. "There's something you need to know, love." Mark looked at her. "What?" Mrs.Feehily took his hands and squeezed them. "Your grandmother was very sick before she died. We didn't tell you that because we didn't want you to worry." Mark's ears perked up. "What do you mean, she was sick?" His voice was getting angrier. "She caught pneumonia two days before she passed on. The doctors thought she would recover, but she never did." Mrs.Feehily said in a quiet voice. "Why didn't you tell me? I would have rung her up!" Mark felt his emotions boil over. "Now son�. Don't get so upset. She told us to not to tell you because she felt you would get too worried." "Hell yeah! I would!" Mark looked away from his own mother. He heard her sigh. "Okay. I'll leave you alone for now." His mother got up and left. ***** Later that night ***** I watched television as I laid in bed in my pajamas. I couldn't stop thinking about how Mark was acting. This wasn't the Mark I knew. "His grandma just died and you're worried about how he acts?" I scolded myself. All of sudden, I heard the door open and a thud. It was Nicky dropping his overnight bag. "What are you doing here? I thought you would be at Mark's." He asked me with a look on his face. "Nice to see that I'm welcome here." I said in a sarcastic tone. "I didn't mean it that way. It's just a surprise." Nicky took off his jacket. He still looked handsome as ever. He was wearing a blue short-sleeved blouse with a white t-shirt underneath it, along with dark blue jeans. His hair was still in blonde spikes. "I figured Mark would want to spend time alone with his family." I explained to Nicky. "I see. How is he doing?" Nicky sat down on the unoccupied bed. I shrugged my shoulders. "He won't talk to me. I don't know why he invited me to come here when he won't say a single word at all!" "Just give him some time, and he'll come around. His grandmother was like the 6th member of the band." Nicky chuckled at his little joke. I giggled a little bit after hearing Nicky's little comment. "Shh!" I exclaimed. It was good to hear him laugh again. Something better was both of us actually laughing together again. ***** The next day ***** Nicky offered to accompany me to Mark's house to see how he was doing. He borrowed Kian's car and drove the two of us over there. Mrs.Feehily answered the door. "Oh good! You're here! I was waiting for you!" I looked at her in confusion. "What's wrong?" Mrs.Feehily took me by the arm. "Oh dear� Mark has shut himself in his room. He won't come out, not even to eat his lunch." Nicky closed the door behind us. "You mean, he hasn't eaten for nearly 48 hours?" he asked Mrs.Feehily. Mrs.Feehily let out a small gasp. "Has it been that long?" She turned to me. "Please, can you go up and talk to him?" I nodded my head. It was the only thing I could do. Nicky thought it would be a good idea if he came with me as well, in case he had to force Mark out of his room. We went upstairs and knocked on his door. "Go away!" we both heard Mark's voice from inside. I tapped the door again. "It's me Mark. Michelle." I heard his footsteps coming to the door and the door creaked open. "Michelle?" he asked me. I took a look at Mark. His hair was unruly and his clothes were all wrinkled. I only saw a small portion of his room from the crack. It was dark and humid in there. "My God Mark." I touched his hair. "Are you alright?" Mark rubbed his eyes. They were swollen and had dark circles underneath. "Everyone has been asking me that damn question since I got here!" "But we're worried about you. We can't help it when you lock yourself in your room." I pleaded. Mark scoffed. "Let Nicky and I help you." I asked Mark as he still stood inside his room with the door nearly closed. "You mean your ex-boyfriend is here?" I could sense the bitterness in his voice. I glanced at Nicky who leaned again the wall in the hall. He raised his eyebrows after hearing Mark say that. "Don't be silly. You know I can't drive on the left side of the road and Nicky was so kind to offer to drive me here." I explained. Mark opened the door even more. He let me come in and I stepped over some articles of clothing. It was so dark in the room that I flipped the lights on. "Turn the bloody lights off!" Mark groaned as the light pierced his eyes. "You need to get out of your room. Your family needs you." I opened up the window to let all the hot air out. "No they don't. They lied to me." Mark crawled back into his bed. I sat down next to him and pulled the covers away from him. "They wouldn't do that Mark." "They sure did. I'm so sick of everyone. I just wish that I could sink through the floor and never return again." I gasped. "You're sick of me?" "No�. I'm not�. I just don't want to deal with anyone right now, including you." Mark turned away from me. "Then why did you ask me to come here with you if you're so sick of me?" I felt my voice getting louder. "That was a mistake. I can't be with you right now." His voice was so small. "Fine Mark. Have it your way. I'm leaving." I got up and turned the lights off. "What's wrong?" Nicky asked me as I stormed down the hall. He caught up with me as we came to his car. "Tell me!" I crossed my arms. "Mark's going nuts. He just told me that he's sick of me and doesn't want to be with me right now," I bit my lips. "In plain English, he meant it's over between me and him." Nicky let out a sharp exhale. "Ouch." "Yeah, ouch. Let's go. I need to loosen up." I got inside the car and waited for Nicky to drive me somewhere. "I know a pub in town where we can get a drink or two," Nicky said as he started the car up. "I'm sorry to hear about you and Mark." "I'm not. If he wants to act this way to everyone, what's the point?" I fumed. ***** A local pub in downtown Sligo ***** "Can you get me a cooler, that is if they sell them here?" I asked Nicky when we found a table inside the pub. "Sure." He got up and left to get our drinks. I sighed in frustration while Nicky was gone. I couldn't believe the way Mark was acting. I knew he was under pressure because of his grandmother's death, but to break up with me? That was the last straw. Nicky came back with two bottles, a raspberry cooler for me and a beer for himself. "Are you going to talk to Mark?" He asked me as he sipped his drink. "No. If he says it's over between us, then it is. Ever since I got here, it's like I'm the third wheel wherever he goes." I drank even more, hoping to forget about Mark. "I'm sure he didn't mean it." Nicky tried to be sympathetic. "I just don't want to talk about it now, okay?" I tried to smile for him. "I'm just glad you're here." Nicky smiled back. "Yeah." He murmured. Soon enough, we had a couple of drinks and I could tell I was already drunk. I kept seeing double vision and it seemed like Nicky had a little bit more than he could handle too. We were laughing about silly pointless things like why ducks waddle or why the beaver was the national animal of Canada. Suddenly, the radio started playing a song and Nicky had a wicked grin on his face. "Dance with me?" He grabbed my arm and we stumbled onto the dance floor. Every now and then, I get a little bit lonely and you're never comin' around Every now and then, I get a little bit tired of listening to the sound of my tears Every now and then, I get a little bit nervous that the best of all the years have gone by Every now and then, I get a little bit terrified and then I see the look in your eyes Every now and then, I fall apart Every now and then, I fall apart Nicky pulled me closer to him and I could smell the alcohol on his breath. He let out a silly growl and laughed. "Remember the old days we'd dance like this?" he teased me. Every now and then, I get a little bit restless and I dream of something wild Every now and then, I get a little bit helpless and I'm lying like a child in your arms Every now and then, I get a little bit angry and I know I've got to get out and cry Every now and then, I get a little bit terrified and then I see the look in your eyes Every now and then, I fall apart Every now and then, I fall apart ***** Meanwhile ***** Mark punched his pillow in annoyance. "What the hell did you do that for?" he berated himself silently. Mark let out a sigh and laid back in bed again. He was half right in his words, he was sick of everything, sick of all the lies and questions. ***** Sligo bar ***** Nicky wrapped his strong arms around my waist and I let him nuzzle my neck. It had been so long that we enjoyed each other's presence. And I need you now tonight And I need you more than ever And if you'll only hold me tight We'll be holding on forever And we'll be makin' it only right 'Cause we'll never be wrong Together, we can take it to the end of the line Where love is like a shadow on me all of the time I don't know what to do and I'm always in the dark We're living in a powder keg and givin' off sparks I really need you tonight Forever's gonna start tonight Forever's gonna start tonight Nicky couldn't believe he was finally holding Michelle in his arms. After all the months that he had thought he lost her, she was still there. But a nagging thought in his brain kept telling him that Michelle really belonged with Mark and not him. He ignored his conscience and looked down at Michelle's green eyes. Even though they were both completely drunk, they needed each other at that point. Once upon a time, I was fallin' in love But now I'm only fallin' apart There's nothing I can do A total eclipse of the heart Once upon a time, there was light in my life But now there's only love in the dark There's nothing I can say A total eclipse of the heart Every now and then, I know you'll never be the boy you always wanted to be Every now and then, I know you'll always be the only boy who wanted me the way that I am Every now and then, I know there's no one in the universe as magical and wondrous as you Every now and then, I know there's nothing any better, there's nothing that I just wouldn't do Every now and then, I fall apart Every now and then, I fall apart I peeked up at Nicky and saw he was staring at me with his striking blue eyes. I couldn't resist myself but to kiss him while I stood on my toes. He took enjoyment in that and kissed back even more passionately. And I need you now tonight And I need you more than ever And if you only hold me tight We'll be holdin' on forever And we'll only be makin' it right 'Cause we'll never be wrong Together we can take it to the end of the line Where love is like a shadow on me all of the time I don't know what to do and I'm always in the dark We're living in a powder keg and givin' off sparks I really need you tonight Forever's gonna start tonight Forever's gonna start tonight Nicky swung me around after kissing me. "Does that mean we're back together again?" he slurred. I laughed. "Maybe." I was far too drunk to realize what was going on. But we were having too much fun to notice anything. Once upon a time, I was fallin' in love Now I'm only fallin' apart Nothing I can do A total eclipse of the heart Once upon a time, there was light in my life Now there's only love in the dark Nothing I can say A total eclipse of the heart A total eclipse of the heart I felt Nicky kiss me again, only on my forehead this time. "Do you realize that we both are completely wasted?" he asked me again as he stumbled, still holding me. I rubbed my forehead. "Yeah, but I like it anyways." He chuckled. "Me too." A total eclipse of the heart�� song performed by: Bonnie Tyler |