| I Need You |
I couldn't believe that I hadn't been able to get tickets for the Boyzone concert, it was going to be my only chance to see the Westlife lads. I was quite glad that their co-manager, Ronan, made them go on tour with him and Boyzone as it gave me more chances to see them. I went to the box office to see if they had any spare tickets, I didn't care where they were, if it meant that I got to see the gorgeous Mark then I would sit anywhere. They were all sold out though. I slowly walked back to the train station in the pouring rain, I was soaked and just wanted to go home and cry. This was the worst day of my life. The cold wind blew my hair across my face, but I didn't care, my lips were shaking and I couldn't feel my fingers. I could hear the fans inside Wembely Arena screaming, I knew that I should have been in there, part of the crowd. I walked along with my head hanging, I knew what my friends would say at school the next day. "Sorry to bother you but you wouldn't know where the back-stage entrance to Wembely Arena Wembley is, would you?" a soft Irish voice said. I looked up and standing in front of me was Mark , the man who I had declared my undying love for all over my school books. "Erm....you just follow the path and go along by the metal gates, I'm Chelsea by the way." I stumbled. Mark stood there smiling, I was still shaking although now I didn't know whether it was because I was cold or because I was standing next to the man of my dreams. "They told me that the English weather is like the Irish, but I didn't think it was this bad." said Mark laughing. I didn't know what to do or say, he slowly wrapped his leather jacket round me. "Hey, do you wanna come with me and we'll see if we can get you dried off somewhere?" asked Mark . With that he took my hands, placed them in his and started walking. We walked up the road, slowly approaching the arena. We got to the gates and I saw Boyzone`s head of security, Barrie Knight. He looked down at me and laughed at Mark . "Tut tut, what will Ro say?" Barrie said smiling at me. "You know I'm only meant to let family and friends in?" he asked us. "Yeah, and Chelsea 's my friend." answered Mark . I couldn't believe that Mark had just called me his friend, he took my hand and told me to follow him. There were lots of people walking around back-stage, I stood in awe watching all of them, I couldn't believe this was real. Mark went to walk off, but suddenly turned around, gazing at me. "Look I've gotta go on now, but I promise I'll come and see you afterwards......I swear." I spent the rest of the concert watching from the side of the stage, I was still fazed by the fact that I`d just been speaking to the "love" of my life. Mark announced the final song, it was to be 'I have a dream', the guys all seemed perfect up there on stage. I was trying to work out why I had fallen for this guy who was living a completely different life to me. My mind was quickly cleared as I was ushered away by a security guard. "Sorry, love, you`re gonna have to move, we need this space clear for the lads to come out", I walked over to the exit, and was about to leave when I heard that familiar voice again. "Hey, it`s Chelsea isn`t it? Ya going?", I turned to see a sweaty Mark wiping his head with a towel. "Ummm...Yer, I should get back.", I replied slowly, I didn`t know what I was meant to do, turn and leave or stay and watch them go. "Oh, ok, Can ya give us a ring sometime? I`d like to speak to ya for a bit.", With that Mark walked over to me, embracing in a hug, he passed a piece of paper into my hand. As he stood there in front of me I felt my stomach flip, he leaned over to kiss me on the cheek then was pulled away by some security blokes. "Speak to ya soon, yeah?", Mark whispered. I exited out of the door, walking past the hoards of screaming fans. Slowly I made my way home. I was trying to figure out what Mark wanted to say, maybe he`d say he loved me "Don`t be stupid, as if his gonna say that!", I said to myself. When I got home I sat on my bed, placed the telephone number under my pillow, I wasn`t going to lose it, and slowly drifted of to sleep. The next morning I woke up suddenly, I`d had a dream that I had rung Mark , but when I went to see him everyone was laughing at me. "She reckons he`d wanna know her, she must be mad", they were all saying. Maybe I shouldn`t ring him, I`d look desperate, and I might make a fool of myself again. No, I`d leave it until my head was clearer. " Chelsea , Chelsea , wakey wakey, earth to Chelsea , ya there?", I clicked back to reality to find my best mate Simone waving her hands frantically in front of my face. "What`s up, you look sad.", I didn`t know whether I should tell Simone , my mate who also had the world`s largest crush on Mark . But I needed to tell someone, get it out of my system. "You know I tried getting tickets for the Boyzone concert, I went up to Wembely Arena last night to see if they had any spares, and when I was up there I met Mark ...", I was stopped mid sentence by`s reaction, "OOOOOHH, MY GOD, you met him, aaaaah, what was he like, did ya get a pic.... some autographs, what did he say?", "Look he didn`t say much but he gave me his telephone number and asked me to ring him, I dunno whether I should though". By this stage Simone 's chin was practically touching the ground, "Are you stupid, course you should ring him, you`ve gotta, gimme the number, I wanna ring him, COME ON!". It was clear that I wasn`t going to get out of this now, there was no way Simone was going home without me ringing Mark . I slowly walked upstairs and pulled the bit of paper from beneath the pillow. "Hello, who is it?", a soft Irish voice said. "Erm..you probably won`t remember me..but, erm, I`m C ...", to my amazement I was stopped mid-sentence "Oh, hiya Chelsea , howiya? Thanks for ringing me, I wasn`t too sure if ya would.", Mark said, he seemed genuinely happy that I`d rung. "I`m fine thanks, you?", "Oh I`m grand...listen we`re in London for the last concert, can ya come up and see me? I`m at the Hilton Hotel.", Mark was asking me to come and see him, I didn`t have a clue what to say and just stood there, Simone rushed over and grabbed the phone. "Hi Mark , I`m Simone , Chelsea `s mate, sure she`ll come and see ya, and I`ll come and keep her company!", She gushed. "Ya, just bring her now", Mark `s cheerful tone dropped. "Bye Mark " , "Bye, tell Chelsea I`ll see her later". With that Mark put the phone down and Simone was left smiling from ear to ear. "What`s happening...wh..what did he say?", I mumbled. "We`ve gotta go up there now, come on", Simone squealed happily. We arrived outside the hotel, there was no one around so we walked up to the reception inside in the warmth. "I`m here to see..", "Hey Chelsea , it`s you ain`t it?", what was this with Mark butting in stopping me mid sentence! "Yeah..and er, this is Simone .". Simone ran over to Mark and gave him hug, "Ooooh lovely to meet you, how r u?", she cried. "Erm, fine, I just wanna..um.. speak to Chelsea for a min", Mark said trying to move away from Simone , he seemed nervous and fidgety, well I suppose that was the effect Simone had on him I told myself! "Go on then, go off and leave me all on my own", Simone said sarcastically. Something caught my eye over by the reception desk, a young guy hiding his tired face under a baseball cap. "Look", Mark replied, "You can go and keep Shane company - Here Shane I`ve got a lady for you!", at that Shane came walking over grinning, he took Simone `s hand and they went off giggling down the corridor. "Where do ya find all these lovely ladies Mark ?!", Shane said jokingly. It seemed like Mark and I were in silence for an age, just the two of us sitting there, I eventually plucked up the courage to say something. "So..erm..nice hotel", ok I know it was stupid buy what was I meant to say? Mark had been looking at the floor but was now looking into my eyes. "Yeah it is, look... I er, wanted to say that I`d like to get to know you a bit better.", at that moment Mark `s phone rung, I turned to look out the window, I didn`t dare look him in the eye, I could see in the reflection of the window he was watching me, what did he really feel towards me? "Look, sorry I`ve got to go, could I have your telephone number?", Mark rose from the seat and handed me and piece of paper to write on. "Yeah, ok. Do you know where Simone is?", "Yeah, she`ll be somewhere with Shane , I`ll send her down!", with that Mark leant over and hugged me, and began to walk back to his room. Suddenly he turned and jokingly shouted "Ring me or I`ll get Shane on ya!", laughing he disappeared round a corner. I sat and waited for 5 minutes until Simone appeared grinning. "And what happened to you?", I joked, "Hmmmm, wouldn`t you like to know!..... I`ll tell you anyway, me and Shane were just sitting in his room play fighting over which TV channels to watch then he suddenly leant over and snogged me, it was maaaaaad", Simone was jumping up and down excitedly. "Ooooh, so when`s the wedding", I laughed. "Haha, your just jealous, his got my number and says he`ll give me a ring tonight." We left the hotel and all the way home I had Simone trying to decide between Shane and Mark , I wasn`t listening half the time, I was too busy thinking about Mark . I couldn`t figure out if I loved him or if it was just lust. Anyway, I`d told myself that he didn`t feel the same about me, so there was no point bothering with it. * * * * * * * * Over the next few months or so Simone and I would go and see the guys whenever we could, Mark would ring every two weeks and things always stayed the same. He never said anything else, like he was saying the first time we properly met at the hotel, so I didn`t think anything about him having feelings for me. Simone had started to go and see the lads more, she would always talk of how she`d seen Mark and how great he was doing. I always had this feeling that something was going on, but Simone never spoke about a relationship so nothing was said. One day I got a phone call from Mark , they were all going out for a meal and wondered if I`d like to come. I asked about Simone coming, "Oh she hasn`t mentioned it to you? I told her too, oh yeah she`s coming she was the one who arranged it all.", I carried on normally for the rest of the phone call but as soon as Mark hung up, a tear fell from my eye. "I LOVE HIM, I LOVE HIM", I cried. It was clear now, Mark and Simone were going out. All the times she`d met up with him, spoken to him. That was why Mark hadn`t spoken to me anymore, he loved her. I tried to convince myself that I was happy for Simone , I couldn`t kid myself though, I wanted him, I loved him. * * * * * * * * As I drove into the restaurant car park I could see Mark `s car, two people were getting out, they walked hand in hand to the door, kissed then entered. I knew it was Simone with Mark , but I had told myself not to think about it anymore, it would only get me more upset. On approaching the table Kian came up and gave me a friendly hug, Shane was the same as usual, the large bear hug that nearly starved you of air. Nicky seemed in a world of his own and Bryan came over and greeted me with a big hello. Mark was busy talking to Simone , but noticed all the other guys getting up so came over. For those few minutes when we were embraced in a hug I felt warm and happy, as if I didn`t have a care in world. However, that soon ended and I was thrust back into reality. Over dinner we chatted about what we`d all been up to, Mark only seemed to have eyes for Simone . However, Shane seemed to be paying Mark lot of attention, something was up but I couldn`t figure. Simone and Shane went off to get some more drinks, when they didn`t appear back after 10 minutes Mark said he`d go and look for them. Myself, Kian , Nicky and Bryan were joking about how he couldn`t stand being away from her, when suddenly our jokes were halted by shouting coming from the other side of the room. "WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?", Mark was shouting loudly, he didn`t care if the whole restaurant heard him. "ANSWER ME, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU`RE PLAYING AT?", Kian ran over and pulled Mark `s arm back. "Calm down mate, what happened?", "Only my mate here decides to go off and snog my so called girl-friend.", We all stood there shocked at the thought that Shane and Simone would go behind Simone `s back. "Ok, Chelsea could you take Simone home, Nicky and Bryan you look after Mark and Shane you can come with me.", Kian seemed to know what he was doing, although truth be told I didn`t want to even look at Simone * * * * * * * * We headed towards the car park and drove home, neither of us said anything. When I pulled up outside Simone `s flat she started to explain. " Chelsea , I`m sorry, I..we didn`t mean to hurt anyone. When I was going out with Mark I always liked Shane , and I knew he felt the same. Then one day when we saw each other it just happened.." , "so how long were u seeing him behind Mark `s back?", I asked sternly. "Probably about a month, I`m so sorry though, I...", "Don`t be sorry with me, it's Mark you should be telling this to", I answered indignantly. "He won`t want to see me. Anyway, as I was saying it just happened between me and Shane and before I knew it got out of hand.", Simone replied. With that, she opened the car door and got out, she turned to wave goodbye and I drove off. I went home thinking about Mark , nothing but Mark . I was about to go to bed when there was a knock at the door. Tiredly I opened the door, I was already half asleep so I was taken by surprise when I realised Mark was standing in front of me with tears rolling down his eyes. "What`s up Mark ? Do you want to come in?", he just nodded and made his way over to the sofa where he slumped down. " Chelsea .. I dunno what I`m going to do... I`ve lost one of my best mates and my girl friend.", he looked at me with tearful eyes, it was that look that captured my heart in the first place, I wanted to tell him I loved him. "Just talk to them, it may be hard but you never know what they have to say.", I didn`t know what to say. There was part of me that wanted to tell him that Simone and Shane were scum, he didn`t deserve either of them. Part of me wanted to turn around and say how I wanted to be with him for the rest of my life, but I was scared he didn`t feel the same. We sat up most of the night talking about things, I felt so comfortable with Mark around. I was sitting happily, laughing at Mark 's jokes of how he slept with a horse when he was young, when I was struck by bad news. "Yeah, ya know Kel, I need a break, tomorrow I`m going to get away from it all. I feel like going to Australia.", Mark cried excitedly. He left soon after to go and pack, I`d pick him up tomorrow and he`d get the first flight out. I didn`t sleep that night...I cried. Had I lost my only chance? If he was going to be off in another part of the world he`d meet other girls, I`d missed my only chance to tell him how I felt. Now he`d never know. * * * * * * * * "C`mon, Chelsea , I have a plane to catch", Mark yelled up the apartment stairs. I was hurriedly locking the door, whilst busy wiping tears from my eyes. All the way to the air-port Mark promised to ring me. "I`ll be fine Chelsea , I`ll ring when I get there and tell ya where you can write to, I`ll keep in touch don`t worry". Mark hadn`t spoken to any of the others yet, he said he didn`t want to. We entered the airport and Mark got a ticket, after checking in we walked to the terminal. "I`m gonna miss you Mark ", I was battling against the tears, trying to hold them in, I failed though. "Hey, hey, don`t cry, baby. Chelsea you know I`m gonna miss you to, now don`t start blubbing cos ya gonna start me off as well!", he laughed and gently wiped a tear from my check with his soft hand. The final call for Mark `s flight went out, a few people came rushing in. "Well this is it, I suppose.", Mark picked his bag up, kissed me on the cheek and gave me a hug. "Bye", I whispered. He turned and walked past passport control. I watched him, crying my eyes out I waved. Once he`d disappeared I turned to go home, that was it. I had to move on. * * * * * * * * " Chelsea ... Chelsea ... wait up... hold on.", someone was shouting, they were obviously out of breath. " Chelsea , there's..s..something I need to tell you, I..I.I love you", I turned round quickly to find Mark in tears. "I love you to", I mouthed, I couldn`t speak, I was crying so much. Mark dropped his bag and came running over. He hugged me and we kissed slowly, the way I could have only have dreamt about before. It was like one of those scenes from the movies, only better as it was actually happening to me. It seemed that the whole world stood still, it was just me and Mark and that's all that mattered. "I couldn`t go without telling you how I felt, how I`ve felt ever since I first saw you. All I`ve ever wanted to do is to be with you.", Mark said. I wanted to cry again, but this time with happiness. "So what about the thing with Simone ?", I asked quietly. "I thought you didn`t like me, and Simone was very flirtatious so it just happened, but I`ve never felt for her the way I feel for you.", replied Mark whilst brushing my hair from my face."I need you", he whispered. |