| My Diary Also Entitled I Will Always Love You |
| 4th February 8:15am Dear Diary, Today is the day. I�m not sure if I�m dreading it or anticipating it. Today is the day the new boy is going to see our class, his new class, for the first time. My writing may be a little shaky as I�m writing this on the way to school in the school bus. I wonder what he will look like? Blonde or brunette? Tall or short? Weedy or muscular? I guess I won�t find out until I get to school. I�m sitting next to my best friend, Carly. She has blonde hair and blue eyes. I�m going to finish now, the boys keep peeping over my shoulder to see what I�m writing. 4th February 9:00am Dear Diary, The new boy is called Shane. Shane Filan, to be exact. He�s Irish, with brown hair and brown eyes. He�s gorgeous, I don�t mind admitting that but I probably will never get to talk to him anyway. In addition, that pig, Jodie is making eyes at him. Jodie is much prettier than I am. He will most probably fall for her and won�t take notice of me. The teacher is still introducing him. I wonder where he will have to sit. Oh, he has to sit next to me. He�s sitting next to me. He turns his head, looks at me and immediately smiles. Oh, his smile is so heavenly. I smile back. �Hello� he says. �Hello� I say back. He turns away again. I can�t write anymore. Lessons are about to start. 11th February Dear Diary, I walked into the classroom this morning with Carly and on my desk was half a packet of my favourite sweets and a note. I guessed at once who they were from as Shane was sitting at his desk, blushing as red as a tomato! I read the note: To Holly, (it said) I bought these this morning. I ate half but then felt a bit sick and I overheard you saying to Carly how these were your favourite sweets. So I thought you would like them. Speak to you soon (I hope!) From Shane. So he knew who I was! I took the sweets and placed them in my pocket. I smiled at Shane. I saw Jodie scowling at me. I felt good about that. Shane thought I was better than Jodie! At lunchtime, I was talking to Carly and Laura when Shane walked over with Laura�s boyfriend James. �So, Shane, who do you fancy then?� Carly asked Shane who blushed again. �Jodie? Sarah? Louise? Come on, you can tell us.� Laura lightly punched Shane�s shoulder. �Well, it�s not going to be me. I must be one of the most ugly girls in our class.� I decided to speak up. �No, you�re not ugly.� Shane finally spoke. �You�re quite pretty actually.� He managed to smile at me before his embarrassment overpowered him and he scuttled off. I felt my face go red. �You�re blushing!� Laura pointed it out as though I didn�t know. �Look, Carly, Holly�s blushing!� I stuck my tongue out as the bell went for the end of lunch. During afternoon school, Shane kept glancing at me. Charlie Blunders, the class joker, tried to pass a folded note past me to Robert the other side of me. But I snatched it off of him and read it. There was a heart and inside it, it said Shane 4 Holly in black felt tip. I screwed it up and aimed it accurately at Charlie�s head. He turned around. �Get real,� I said. �Whatever gave you that idea?� He seemed to glance at Shane, as if to say �I tried� and turned around. The bell went for the end of school. 14th February Dear Diary, It�s Valentine�s Day. I�m thirteen and I have upheld a record of not getting one single Valentine�s card in my entire life! It was all to change though, as I walked into class and sat down. The teacher got the old post-box for Valentine�s gifts, which was full to the brim with roses, chocolates and cards. She began giving them out. Suddenly, a card and a single red rose landed on my desk. I looked at Carly. She gave me the thumbs up sign. I opened the card. To Holly, (it said) Meet me outside the golf club after school. Love from Your secret admirer xxx I glanced at Shane�s desk. No cards or roses. I found myself feeling happy about that. I think I am in love! I stood outside the golf club, alone after persuading Carly that it wasn�t a good idea for her to wait with me. People were walking by me. I was afraid this person was going to stand me up. I looked at my watch. 4:30pm. I had been waiting over three-quarters of an hour. I picked up my bag and began to walk down the road. �Wait, Holly.� A voice shouted. I turned around. It was Shane. �Shane! Why did you make me wait so long?� I was expecting to be surprised but I found I wasn�t. I felt happy that it was him. �I wanted to make sure everyone had gone. Holly, since the first time I spoke to you on my first day, I have loved you. I felt today was the perfect day to tell you.� Shane took my hand. He leant forward. I smelt the scent of just-washed hair. I followed my instinct and kissed him on the cheek. I then realised what I had done and pulled away. But my eyes met his and I felt his lips, soft and moist, touch mine. After what seemed like forever, I caught sight of my watch. 4:55pm! I pulled away. �I�d better get home. It�s getting late and my mum will wonder where I am.� I placed my bag on my back. �Well, see you tomorrow.� The soft touch of his lips again, this time on my cheek. I walked away, not knowing that this was the last time I would see Shane, conscious and stable. 15th February Dear Diary, I walked into the classroom, expecting to see Shane sitting at his desk. He wasn�t there. I didn�t think anything of it and I sat down. The teacher arrived and with her came the worst news I had heard in my life. She told us that Shane was in hospital, in a coma after being knocked down by a bus last night. Tears filled my eyes. I felt sick and Carly saw me and she asked the teacher if she could sit in Shane�s place today. The teacher didn�t see any harm in that so Carly sat next to me and tried to comfort me. At lunchtime, I sat behind the bike shed and cried. I loved Shane from the first day I�d seen him, and a kiss didn�t seem enough for me to express how I felt. Now, he was in a coma and I didn�t know how long it would be before I could tell him how I really felt, if indeed I would see him again. I asked the teacher what hospital Shane was in. She told me and, immediately after school, I made my way to the hospital. I shuddered as I walked past the golf club. Shane was lying, unconscious, attached to a machine monitoring his heart rate. I sat by his bed. I introduced myself to Shane�s mum and then emotion overpowered me and I took Shane�s limp hand and sobbed. I asked the doctor to keep me posted about Shane�s condition and gave him my phone number. I left the hospital, feeling sick and dizzy. 16th February, Dear Diary, The phone rang. I picked it up, feeling my hand shake. �Hello.� My voice didn�t sound like my own. �Hello, is this Holly?� The doctor�s voice came down the phone. �Yes. What�s happened?� I closed my eyes, expecting the worst. It came as expected. �Well, it�s going to be hard breaking this to you, but we lost Shane in the early hours. Do you want to come and see the body?� The doctor broke the news as gently as he could but nothing could prepare me for the horror and shock that hit me like a wave. �Y..y..yes, I think I will. Thank you, doctor.� I replaced the receiver and ran out the house, my mum�s shouts falling on deaf ears. When I got there, tears rolled down my cheeks as Shane�s body lay there on the ward bed. I took his lifeless hand. I leant close to his ear and said the first words that came to mind. �I love you. I will always love you.� Note to Shane Dear Shane, I wrote this after my diary entries, hoping that your spirit is reading this over my shoulder. Our short crossing of paths of life meant everything to me. There wasn�t enough time for me to express how I truly felt so I express it all in this note. I saw you on the first day and my heart skipped a beat. When you told me I was quite pretty, I was so happy that you had chosen me over Jodie. I look back over the past three weeks. It went so quickly and then I had lost you. You are, and will always remain, my first true love. I will end this note with the words I whispered to you on your deathbed. I love you. I will always love you. Holly xxxxx |