Children of the night; what sweet spoilers they make:

I had high hopes for this film, though I wasn't too keen on the trailers - they made the movie look a bit too corny. I was hoping the movie would stretch beyond that and be good, or failing that, at least fun. It actually started off extremely well. The townspeople mobbing, coming for Victor Frankenstein and whatever evil experimentation he's up to, all in dramatic black and white. But a strong beginning won't carry an entire film. And what I wasn't expecting was that the film would attempt to stretch too far...

In the film, Van Helsing (Hugh Jackman) is a young Indiana-Jones-type employed by the Vatican to fight monsters, and ends up going after Dracula, Frankenstein, and the Wolfman all at the same time. Well, not really, but I don't want to give it away. Plus, this description makes it sound that much more like a goofy 1950's Abbot and Costello movie.

The first problem this movie runs into is that it is riddled with cliches: the main character acts like any other Indiana Jones wannabe; the love interest (Kate Beckinsale) acts like every other strong, sexy, damsel-in-distress feminist; and of course, Van Helsing's ring matches the symbol on an old piece of parchment, which indicates his history is linked to that of the monsters in Transylvania he is about to go fight. "Action movie suspension of disbelief" is required here, in force. You've got your Falling From Impossible Heights and Getting Up and Walking Away, your Silly Mistakes That Actually End Up Helping You, and the Major Plot Hole, But It's Okay, It's an Acion Movie. To top that all off, dialogue, pacing, and story-line all leave something to be desired.

This is all kind of expected in your run-of-the-mill Hollywood let's-throw-together-a-summer-blockbuster. What I didn't expect from this film is all it yearns to be. In one sense, it wants to be a take-me-seriously action period piece, and at the same time, wants to be one of those light-hearted amusing period movies that uses present-day dialogue. (The Brides of Dracula say things like, "Love to!" and "Too bad, so sad.") Van Helsing also can't decide between being a fun action-adventure movie or a intense character-driven drama. The action in the film is enjoyable, and you can find yourself getting caught up in it, but then the film pulls a switch on you and tries to develop Van Helsing's history and delve into his character. Finally, it tries to give equal time to being a dark, mysterious, dramatic film and being a light-hearted action film with a lot of comic relief. Imagine trying to be Men in Black on one side and Bram Stoker's Dracula on the other. Of course, it ultimately fails in all these respects. While the movie didn't spend near enough time in character development to provide the backstory for Van Helsing and develop the sympathy for the character it was looking for, it still ended up being at least a half-hour too long.

Of course, it didn't help anything that whenever the Frankenstein monster screamed, all I could see was Peter Boyle.

In the end it was too much James Bond, too much Indiana Jones, too much Wild, Wild West, and too much Men in Black, all while trying to maintain it's own identity as it's own film.

			See it if action-adventure is your favorite genre and you tend to suspend a lot of disbelief when you watch a movie. Don't see it if you've seen this all before and aren't interested in seeing another attempted twist on a number of old ideas.

© 2004 Jim Manchester