| POEM'S BY LOL ABOUT HER SON SAUL |
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| FOR SAUL (THE ASKED FOR CHILD) when do you feel happy When do you feel sad Do you think that you're a failure And everyone thinks you're bad Do you really understand Whats happening in your head Do you really hate me And love your dad instead Do you truly wish son That i was really dead I wish that you could tell me Right from the very start Whats going on inside yous heart Cos its tearing me apart I feel that i am failing you It's getting harder with each year What does the future hold for us Happiness or fear They say that it gets easier I dont know if it's true I'm only trying to help you I dont know what else to do |
| Theres constant noise from this son of mine Whos days dont start at 7 and end at His body gives up till he can't take no more it's between these times that you're supposed to sleep But you just sit there still, think and weep You wake at night and you don't know why What was that noise or was it a cry You listen again but life is still The crying's still ther but it's trapped within You can't let it out you can't scream and shout You're keeping it in cos you'l never give in He needs me see this son this son of mine I need to be brave strong and kind But who helps me with my worries and fears Is anybody out there who really cares Where are the eyes that can see me Show me your face let me hear your voice Where are the ears that can hear me Give me some hope give me a choice Keep it up they say you're doing fine Does anybody understand this son of mine He's just being a boy he'll be ok you'll see But they can't see what it's doing to me The verbal abuse the constant fight To keep him safe both day and night I can't go on forever i'm doing it all on my own My heart it does feel heavy But it's certainly not made of stone I'm willing to adapt you know just give me guidance and show me the way We're not going anywhere we're here to stay I love my son but need to be strong The road it now seems narrow and long Just give me a glance and not just a fleeting glance This poem I've written is my last plea I can't help my son if you can't help me |