| POEMS |
| This is my vunerable moment this is where I break into, this is when my world spins out of control this is when I lose you I cruise between rage and the deepest of sadneess able to cry for the first time in weeks beating myself till my anger subsides hating my life tll my misery peaks My friends have lied,my lost lost,trust is broken,covet sets in Nothing is worth fighting for Everything real proves to be sin. I gave up what I will never get again for something I thought would be worth the pain, there are so many stories goin at once. It's always so eaasy to screw up again. What I thought I wanted is just another lie to myself What I think I need is only an excuse I've only set myself up again All my control has been torn loose. Wild wishes I want to come true, make a lovely fantasy world, If only i'd pay attintion to reality, I'd see that my life has become unfurled. When will I get my life back? When will i Fucking grow up? When will i get what I want to deserve? when will my nerves stop tearing me up? I go to bed with blood in my mouth grinding my teeth till my head becomes numb. Even in my sleep no peace bends to grace. All I can do is think till i'm dumb. I don't want to eat. I don't wan t to talk. I don't even want to pretend anymore. I keep all these thoughts inside my head amazingly quiet despite all the rage. Shredding my mind while trying to smile Keeping me locked in a self-made cage. I need forgivness for feeling so bad, i can't bear another day of dispare this can't be the lowest i've been, but how do i know if i don't even care. You wouldn't guess i'm dancing inside No one can stop how crazy i feel Out of reach by anything moral Out of reach by anything real. Thats where I find my happiness thinking thoughts nobody knows. Everyday that passes by is another day my distance grows. My love for others conceals the hatred that i can't help but feel for myself. My secrets destroy me.... |
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