After All This Time

	Sharon trudged down the stairs, flicking imaginary flecks of dust off the shoulder of her business jacket as she went. With a dejected sigh, she saw the bundle of envelopes poking through the letterbox, obviously just delivered. Ah, she knew she wouldn't be able to escape it. Today was Valentine's Day. How she wished it would just go away. She took the fat bundle of letters, silently consoled by the phone bill smiling up at her and hiding the bright red envelope underneath it. Well, it would have done, but she couldn't seem to stop herself seeking it out.

	Valentine's cards weren't her dad's style, so it wasn't going to be for Chrissie, and Sharon was, well she was alone, so it wasn't for her. For God's sake, why did Zoe have to send Dennis' Valentine when she lived in the same bloody house? Why couldn't she just give it to him; was the smug cow determined to rub her happiness in the face of the singletons in the household? Well, by that, she meant Sharon of course she did. Probably wanted to ram it home that she'd stolen away the man Sharon loved. How it had happened, Sharon barely remembered. All she knew was that it still hurt. She hid it well of course, that's what Sharon did, but she was so angry with herself for not being over Dennis by now.

	Shaking her head miserably at her own stupidity, she wandered into the kitchen, snapping on the radio. She immediately regretted it.

	"Good morning London. I trust all you guys and gals are loved up this lovely Valentine's morning. Go on, tell 'em you love 'em."

	Dropping the post onto the table, letting it spill messily across the top without a thought, she lurched, urgently pulling the dial and changing station, committing those pathetic seentiments to the forgotten airwaves. Instead, strains of music opening a song filled the room. Waiting for a voice, Sharon prayed that it wouldn't be anything too slushy. She couldn't handle it, she thought to herself, as she flopped into a chair and absent-mindedly sifted through the letters, not this year.

	Last year had been perfect. The fact that Juley Smith had been the one to send her a Valentine and not Dennis as she had hoped without wanting to draw too much attention to this desire, it hadn't mattered. Because Dennis had been there that day, helping her sort out the community centre for the Angie's Den Valentine's Ball, urging her not to give up on the idea of its success. He'd made it all alright. She could still see his face as she'd said;

	"It's missing something-"

	And with a child-like enthusiasm, perhaps the thing Sharon had fallen for the hardest as she had fallen rapidly in love with him that night, he'd cried "Fairylights!"

	Fairylights indeed made the Ball. And Sharon had danced with Dennis, so sensually together in what felt like their own perfect bubble. Anyone who had looked in on them, arms wrapped around each other on that dancefloor would have seen a brother humouring his sister. But Sharon could not have made herself believe that. They had held each other's gaze for too long, he held her too close, yet she could not be close enough. His touch had been like electricity. Perhaps it was because he had longed for her that he didn't need words to know that she was finally falling in love with him as he had done with her. If she could have kissed him as he held her, she would have done.

	And if she could relive that night this year, despite everything that sprang from it, the disastrous relationship they had bravely (or perhaps, foolishly) decided upon and the heartbreak at losing him to the family Sharon finally understood had never been there, then she would have taken it in a moment.

	The song drifted along her own thoughts. Sharon scoffed as she became aware that she was indeed being subjected to the detested love-song, but as she had listened, she became subdued, her memories surrounding her.

	After all the broken stones
	That were thrown, for no good reason
	Inside, she is loving him still
	After all this time.

	The stairs creaked, and Zoe bounded down in her misshapen night-shirt, noticing Sharon sat there, the bright red envelope somehow caught in her fingertips. Ramming some bread into the toaster and spinning round to the fridge and rummaging for some margarine, she glanced over Sharon's shoulder.

	"Who's your Valentine from then Sharon?"

	Sharon jumped a little. She hadn't realised she was no longer alone. "Hmmm? Me?"

	"The card. Addressed to you; who's it from?"

	"Oh. Er..." She fumbled with the flap, pulling the card out, finally registering the dull thudding as Dennis too came down the stairs and plodded into the little room, stopping just a little way behind Sharon's chair.

	"Sharon got a Valentine babe."     

	"Right." he answered flatly, his eyes not moving from Sharon's form.

	"S'not signed." Sharon muttered, casting it aside.

	"Isn't that how they're supposed to work? Shrouded in mystery.... you're meant to work it out-" he told her, almost stumbling forwards as he kissed Zoe.

	"Well maybe I can't be bothered with all that eh?"

	"Oh. Well.... your loss."

	"What's it say?" Zoe asked, already chewing on a strip of the hot toast even though she was halfway through buttering it.

	"Hoping you haven't forgotten me." Sharon read off, pressing her chin into her palm. "Jesus, it's probably only Juley Smith again, and like I said, I just can't be bothered with it. I'm busy." She jumped up, but managed to knock a load of papers that she'd purposefully left there from last night for her to read over this morning, clean off the table. Stamping her foot out of sheer frustration, she bent down to begin scooping them up.

	"Woah, woah!" Dennis chuckled, dropping his toast and bolting past Zoe to help Sharon. "Is this what you're busy with?"

	When she looked up into his face, Sharon knew she'd made a mistake, she could feel the heat prickling in her cheeks, could imagine them being an obvious red. He was still so handsome, she missed admiring him the way Zoe now got to. It was very soon evident that Sharon & Dennis had had another one of those moments where they had held each other's gaze too long, and they both looked hastily away and carried on plucking the papers from the floor.

	"Yeah," Sharon bristled, suddenly remembering she hadn't given a reply. ""yeah. Changing supplier, looking over a dozen or so."

	"Do... do you want a hand? I'm not busy today."

	Sharon was sure she caught a warning look in Zoe's face, who was now simultaneously trying to pull on some jeans, fresh from the dryer, and keep shovelling down more toast as she leant against the table for the little stability it could offer her.

	"No. You're alright."

	She took the papers from him and rushed into the lounge. She turned back as she stood in the doorway and peered into the kitchen. She watched Dennis push himself up from the floor, and thought she saw him curl his hand tight into a fist. She recognised that as something he had always done when something had not gone the way he had hoped. Zoe was stood, her shirt now on the floor, in just her bra and when she called "Dennis, where's my top?" all she got was a grunt, and Dennis turning the volume on the radio up full blast.

	He stomped from the room, and Sharon ducked out of view, slamming hard up against the wall, aware that something in Dennis' dark and stormy face was making her heart beat just that little bit faster.

	And though her heart bears the scars
	No sign of healing
	That's alright, cos she is loving him still
	After all this time.

	Trying to pull herself together, Sharon took a deep breath and settled on the settee, the armful of papers spread out on the coffee table. About five or so minutes later, Zoe slammed out of the house, apparently none too pleased about being left on her own to find her top.

	"Thanks for nothing then Dennis!" she called hotly.

	"Anytime." Dennis replied, sounding like he just couldn't care less.

	Sharon just felt so very uncomfortable between this, today more than ever aware that she was longing to be in Zoe's place. And she waited, with baited breath, paying absolutely no attention to the papers she was apparently studying, waiting for any tell-tale sound that would tell her what Dennis was doing now.

	She didn't have to wait too long. More pounding on the stairs told her to look busy quick. And the creaking of the door handle permitted Dennis' slipping with an air of awkwardness into the room, keeping his gaze halfway between the carpet and Sharon, as if not knowing where it would be best to look. With a small smile that probably went unseen, Sharon noticed his old fail-safe - stuffing his hands into his pockets. God, he was so perfect.

	"Alright?"

	"Er, yeah... sure."

	"You don't sound it darlin'." Sharon commented, not even looking up. "Was madam alright?"

	"Yeah."

	Offering a sweet smile, Sharon swung her hair across her shoulders. "Honestly Dennis, I said I didn't need a hand."

	He went and sat down in the chair opposite the sofa. "No, well.... alright." He kept looking to the right which intrigued Sharon, so she followed his gaze and realised it was locked on the photograph of them both at the Valentine's Ball. Her heart gave a daring leap, which translated into her releasing a nervous chuckle.

	"Are you doing anything for Valentine's then? With Zoe?"

	"Nah. Hearts and flowers ain't really my thing." he told her, picking a loose thread in his jeans. "Cherubs and-"

	"Fairylights?" Sharon offered.

	Dennis looked awkwardly around as he laughed. "You remember then?"

	"Course. We should have done it again this year."

	Sharon noticed that he looked up in alarm. "Wh... wha'?"

	"The Valentine's Ball. It was a great night wasn't it?"

	"Yeah. Yeah it was."

	Trying to push the past away
	Still waitin' for their lives to change
	Try, try for the sake of their pride, pride.
	Learning to barely feel the pain
	The thicker the skin, the less the strain.
	And though it's really hurting
	She ain't breaking, breaking, breaking
	Cos she's loving him still
	After all this time.
	
	Sharon looked quickly back down upon the papers, not trusting herself to look across into his face for any longer without bursting into tears. She cleared her throat, trying to disperse of the tears ready for this action.

	"I woulda liked to do it again." Dennis said slowly.

	Sharon quivered, torturing herself imagining all the things she wished that meant and prayed he did not see. "Yeah, well-"

	She sat, dumbstruck as she recalled that night once more. How he had made love to her so tenderly in the very bed that Zoe now slept in. How he had gasped her name in her ear over and over as the feeling became too good for him to control. How he had cried out with her as she had chosen to bite into his shoulder as she came, scared that if her delighted screams were not smothered, then they would be discovered, How he had encouraged her to wrap herself entirely around him, holding her, and she him as they had overcome their orgasms.

	Remembering the intensity of that night made a feeling of utmost desire build in Sharon's groin and she couldn't help but let go of a crying gasp, that she did not even realise had been heard until Dennis edged forward and asked, concern evident in his voice, 

	"Sharon, are you alright?"

	"Hmmm? Oh, oh yes, I'm fine, just- just a headache. Maybe I'll go walk round the Square for a bit - get some air."

	As she clambered to her feet, he leapt up too, catching her hand as she moved through the room towards the door. She couldn't help but flinch. Because his touch was still so much like electricity. She wanted him, so so badly. But she could only make herself ignore the fleeting expression of hurt across his face as she tore her hand away and raced from the house, forcing air into her lungs where it felt like it had been missing for far too long.

	Now he knows his weakness shows
	Selfish soul, never changing.
	That's fine, cos she's loving him still
	After all this time.

	Composing herself, even though her legs seemed to be like jelly, Sharon began to walk the Square. She took in all the familiar sights, the things she had always known, the people she had always talked to. She walked the market, knowing to avoid the omnipresent puddles in the pot holed road, because, well, she had always known. She nodded and smiled at the traders, returning their "hellos." This was how life had always been in Walford for Sharon, and she was comfortable with it. It was just so strange how everything could still be so normal, even though she was in love with Dennis. Because her normality had gone so wrong when they'd all known, but now they knew that Sharon & Dennis were over and the smiles and "hellos" in the market had returned. It was all alright.

	And to the outside eye
	You see her family getting by
	And it all seems perfect, and that's how she wants it
	Cos she's loving him still
	After all this time.

	She didn't know how long it was before she returned home. She rushed straight through to the kitchen, the radio still blaring on the side. Seeing the Valentine lying where she had left it abandoned, Sharon sat, and gazed over it again.

	"Given any more thought to that?"

	Dennis raised the question softly just behind her ear. Sharon nearly screamed with shock, but managed to stop herself just in time, somehow settling for mere shaking as he drew back and clicked the door shut.

	"N-no." she shivered, letting go of the card again. "Why would I? it's just a stupid Valentine's card, it's nothing." And to prove her point, she snatched it up again and moved off towards the bin.

	Dennis curled his fingertips against the edge of the draining board, straightening his back and clicking his tongue at the side of his mouth. "So that's all I am is it - nothing?"

	"I? You mean.... you?!"

	"Me." Dennis nodded. He looked pointedly towards the card and repeated, "Me. "Hoping you haven't forgotten me." And it's nice to see you haven't."

	"Fairylights...." Sharon muttered thickly, and Dennis smiled.

	"Exactly. You remember every single detail, just like I do."

	"S-So?" she stammered, barely managing exasperation. "Why did you do this Dennis?"

	"Because last year, I didn't bother, and this was what you wanted me to do then, wasn't it?"

	"Then. Not now."

	Trying to push the past away
	Still waitin' for their lives to change
	Try, try for the sake of their pride, pride.
	Learning to barely feel the pain
	The thicker the skin, the less the strain.
	And though it's really hurting
	She ain't breaking, breaking, breaking
	Cos she's loving him still
	After all this time.

	Dennis nodded, moving fowards. "OK. Suit yourself. I only wanted to make it up to you. Look, just give that here and I'll get rid of it."

	But Sharon kept hold of it, able to do nothing but move back from him, almost bewitched by him as he advanced on her, his hand outstretched, waiting to snatch the card away. Sharon ended up backed against the table, having to bend over it as Dennis leant towards her, his hand still ready. She could feel his warm breath on her lips he was so tantalisingly close and the heat continued to build in her groin.

	Bones have to grow, and age it shows
	Though we try and hide it
	Inside, she is loving him still,
	After all this time.

	"Tell- me-" he whispered as she whimpered, unable to lean any further back without risking breaking her spine 

	"that this-" He grabbed the card from her rigid hand, but as she tried to look down towards it, as if recognising it as his subject matter, he pushed her face back towards his with the flat of his hand against her flushed cheek.

	"-wasn't what you wanted!"
	
	Without giving her a moment to deliver a reply, his mouth crashed down upon hers and as if by some instinct, she parted her lips at his fighting tongue's command and permitted it to ravage her mouth. She clung to him desperately, and as he felt her arms around his neck, he pressed his hands into her doubled spine, forcing her to straighten up which meant she was now pressed hard against him, able to feel his flaming skin against her own as his hands continued an exploratory trail down her back, settling around her buttocks and he lifted her swiftly up onto the table, still kissing her fiercely as she closed her legs around his hips, pulling him in towards her closer still.

	As she broke away from his deliciously invasive lips, for the sole intention of taking in a gasping breath of air, he growled, displeased to have been abandoned for any reason and began viciously nuzzling her neck, unable to decide whether to kiss her, bite her or suck her, so he decided on a pattern of all three and the cocktail of pain and pleasure sent Sharon wild as she held him there with one hand.

	She wanted to do something for him and her only thought was to snake her remaining hand into Dennis' trousers and fondle his semi-hard c*ck. The vibration against her flesh as he groaned appreciatively was fantastic.

	"Is that what you want baby? Hmmm?"

	Gasping as she squeezed him, Dennis gave up the nuzzling and concentrated on the feeling of his own pleasure. Sharon bent her head and kissed a trail along his shoulder and up the slope of his neck before reaching his ear and whispering

	"For fuck's sake, tell me we're alone, because I want you so badly-"

	"Oh?" he whispered back, somewhat breathily seeing as Sharon was still stroking him, "What do you want?"

	Sharon smirked. "I want to shag you senseless, anywhere and any way I can."

	Dennis drew back a little and carefully pulled her hand from his trousers. She seemed just as reluctant to stop her action as he himself was to make her. He kissed her hand and pulled her from the table. She stood, watching and waiting for his next move, hunger ablaze in her eyes. He returned her smirk and she immediately pressed herself against him, wrigging a little against his excited groin and happy to hear him cry out as she set to work on getting rid of his clothes. Now Dennis wore nothing but a smile.

	Sharon shrugged off her jacket and allowed Dennis to tear off her blouse without a thought to the buttons. He held her, unclasping her bra and releasing her beautiful breasts. He began to kiss his way down her body, making her shiver with anticipative longing as he reached her navel and continued downwards, discarding her skirt and underwear, he finally took her clit in his warm mouth for just a second, a second which heard Sharon scream out and almost fall over.

	"Oh! Jesus.... that-"

	But Dennis stood and silenced her with a kiss and she was able to taste herself on his lips. "Do what you will darlin'."

	And he sat on the table, awaiting her next move.

	She quickly took it, standing on a chair and moving to straddle Dennis' lap. He helped her across, loving the feeling.

	They stared at each other intensely as Dennis lifted Sharon a fraction off his lap and slowly onto his c*ck.

	In her first few breathy gasps, Sharon managed; "Oh. My. God," before she began a rhythm of lifting herself up and then back down onto him, not for a second taking her eyes from Dennis. She did not miss one contortion in the muscles of his face as the pleasure built.

	And behind his tired eyes
	She sees the boy with his arms wide
	Who made her feel like an angel.

	"Ohhh, fuck Sharon, you feel.... so good.... shit!"

	"Ahh.... erm.... do you want it faster baby? Or shall I....?"

	"Shit!" Dennis cried out again, drilling his nails into her back almost in panic. "Don't stop!"

	She laughed, throwing her head back and baring her neck, which Dennis immediately choose to continue assualting with his mouth. "I'd forgotten.... how.... ahh!.... bloody fantastic.... you.... ohhh.... are at this... oh God!"

	And they were lost to their own pleasure, screaming out for each other as he thrust wildly up into her. She wrapped herself tight around him, her breasts pressed hard into his chest as they rode out their orgasms together, breathing heavily between contented laughter.

	"I fucking love you." Dennis murmured.

	"Well, I love fucking you."

	"That works just as well I suppose." he smiled.

	She giggled as she took his face in her hands.

	"Go on," he said, breathlessly, "tell me that wasn't what you wanted."

	Sharon only leant forward to kiss him again and again.

	Oh that's why she's loving him still	

	"Happy-"
	
	For the rest of her life	

	"Valentine's-"

	She is loving him still

	"Day-"

	For the last of many miles

	"-Dennis."

	She is loving him still
	After all this time.

The End