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33 Ways To Really Annoy People
1) Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%,
extra dark, 17-inch paper, 99 copies.
2) Sit in your yard and point a hair dryer at
passing cars to see if they slow down.
3) Specify that your drive-thru order is "to
go".
4) If you have a glass eye, tap on it with your
pen while talking to others.
5) Sing along at the opera.
6) Insist on keeping your car windsheild wipers
running in all weather conditions, "to keep
them tuned up".
7) Reply to everything someone says with,
"That's what YOU think."
8) Practise making fax and modem noises.
9) Highlight irrelevant material in scientific
papers and "cc" them to your boss.
10) Say "gesundteit" to people who
don't sneeze. When they question you, tell them
that you foresaw a sneeze coming.
11) Finish all your sentences with the words,
"In accordance with prophecy."
12) Signal that a conversation is over by
clamping your hands over your ears.
13) Disassemble your pen and
"accidentally" flip the cartridge
across the room.
14) Holler random numbers while someone is
counting.
15) Adjust the tint on your t.v. so that all the
people are green and insist to others that you
"like it that way".
16) Staple papers in the middle of the page.
17) Publicly investigate just how slowly you can
make a croaking noise.
18) Honk and wave to strangers.
19) Decline to be seated at a restaurant and
simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash
register.
20) TYPE ONLY IN UPPERCASE.
21) type only in lowercase.
22) don t use any punctuation either
23) Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones
and re-route whole streets.
24) Repeat the following conversation a dozen
times: "Do you hear that?"
"What?" "Nevermind, it's gone
now."
25) As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
26) Try playing the William Tell overture, then
announce, "No wait, I messed it up",
then repeat.
27) Ask people what gender they are.
28) While making presentations, occasionally bob
your head like a parakeet.
29) While people are talking to you, make a big
display of looking up their nose.
30) Stomp on little ketchup packets.
31) Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem
doesn't rhyme.
32) Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and
then scribble the answers in a notebook. Mutter
something about "psychological
profiles".
33) Tell your friends four days prior that you
can't go to their party because you're not in the
mood. |
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