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Things That Should Have Happened In 1997 Ever think back to the wonderful year of 1997 and think, "You know, this really should have happened?" Thats what this document does. It takes you on a "should have" journey through 1997. (This list was created by and for The Weird World) 01. The president and Mrs. Wanda Comiel doodied from an eighteen story skyscraper. 02. A salt shaker came to life and terrorized innocent poopers in a public restroom. 03. Five fish were arrested for watching the governors wife dress. 04. Grass was forced to mow itself as punishment for being too tall. 05. A light bulb made four onions do the hokey pokey. 06. Fur was found to be the cause of underarm cancer. 07. Five ninety-three year old men hypnotized a woman into shaving their toes. 08. The president of Russia hijacked 69 beer trucks. 09. Dirt was submitted to the dirty book of world records. 10. A blanket was arrested for public nudity. 11. Picasso was reincarnated, only to kill himself again by giving away all his body parts. 12. A 118 year old woman broke into a nudy bar and stole the show. 13. Straws were banned because the cows learned how to use them to drink their own milk. 14. An escaped mental patient forced a glass of water to do a doodie. 15. Urinals were found to be the cause of a disease known as the common cold. 16. A waiter forced ten customers to give him a whole two cent tip. 17. A naked hamster achieved the world record for seed spitting. 18. Tiny birds poop bombed the entire city of Dallas. 19. Grease was produced in order to generate world lubrication. 20. Santa broke into a small mansion and stole the owners snow globe collection. 21. Doing bad things was outlawed because it was bad. 22. It became a bold fashion statement for someone to cover their face with green gel and scream like a monkey. 23. A band of rebel pickles shot up a casino and made off with a role of quarters. 24. Toilets were forced to do manual labor for invasion of privacy. 25. The coffee industry was shut down for not putting coffee in their coffee. 26. Buggies were made to push old people around in. 27. Plastic fruit was created to replace real fruit. 28. The ground was arrested for looking up girls dresses. 29. Breathing was outlawed because bad breath caused pollution. 30. Ceilings were found to be the cause of darkness and were therefore removed. |
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