 Do you think he'll show up for the date like that? |  Dinner, a movie, steroids? /td>  Nice armpit hair, Fabio.  Ermmm. No  This pic was gonna turn out slammin' but then a nail went through my toe. | |||
 I don't have enough space to truly say all that needs to be said about this picture. AHH! COBRAS!! |  Behind these sunglasses, is what I actually look like! |  Y'know...there's a reason cowboys aren't around anymore. Get some hot coals and brand me 'uninterested'. |  Human being or action figure? You decide! |  Just in case you don't like me, my sweet ride is also single! |
Personals Hall-o-Shame Openers. Lines to truly woo and amaze:
10. "OK. I had an awesome super funy poem about a girl with one eye. Geuss I can't do that. I geuss I have to talk about myself."
This one speaks for itself
9. "i see myself as being a laid back type of n*g, don't like any drama but at the same time want my lady to keep it real with a n*g"
Why would you possibly refer to yourself as something you couldn't spell without blanking out letters in an ad where you are attempting to convince others to like you? Oh right, keepin it real.
8. "Hard working, sarcastic, at times boring"
Awesome! I can't wait til our date so I can fall asleep!
7. "I'll give you a cookie if you look here."
Did not specify kind of cookie. BIG MISTAKE.
6. "YOUR SHIP HAS JUST HIT THE ICEBURG"
Isn't the next part the bit about everyone going down in the Atlantic and dying of hypothermia? I'm not feeling too good about this.
5. "I am a good normal guy. No alcohol problems or mental issues."
Oh good. Now that you've gotten that out of the way! It's a good thing, cause I really hate standing in line at the bottle return!
4. "Whats your function?"
You mean like, body function? PASS!
3. "well i am a computer neird, with great coordination."
Except when typing?
2. "I know, I know...it's sad that I've resorted to placing a personal ad!"
Oh Christ. Well you did, so why apologize for it? Should a person apologize for looking at your ad? Lets start the date out with "Im sorry!"
1.Wookin Pa Nub
Well just so you know, the Jabberwocky is single!
1 1/2. looking for sole mate
There's lots of fish in the sea. But every now and then you reel in the occasional boot.