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| These thought I must get off my chest; So then maybe my mind can get some rest. I know you love me; or at least I think you do, If you should stumble across these words, please don't let them be misunderstood. There are times though, I would give anything for some reassuring words from you. That you still love me, care for me, need to be with me, Because right now I feel unloved, uncared for, unneeded; you see. I know you have your own life, you do your own thing, But I miss the way we used to talk, in the beginning. I am not trying to put you on the spot here, But losing you is something I am starting to hear. I don't want you to defend your actions, or give any explanation. Just some words of comfort would bring me to elation. Why do things always start off so good? Why can't things stay the same? I don't see why not they could. I don't think I have changed, I still want to talk of our future, and of love; I try to make you feel special, like you were sent from above. Whenever you want to talk, I jump into the occasion, But when I want to talk you're always busy so I keep it bottled up (that's where these words came from.) I am not saying these words to make you become defensive; I am not saying these words on the offensive. Am I being too needy? Am I pushing you to stray? Or is your growing distance, the cause of my 'needy' ways? Why are the walls on the brink of going up? I am fighting to keep them down, but I can only do so much. So many viscious circles I am thinking about; That might push you away, when you feel my doubt. So much more to say, but I can't find the words; I can't focus on anything, my thoughts are one big blur. I'm just touching slightly on how I feel. Writing these words helped, since it seems, is my only way to deal. Note: this poem isn't to make anyone feel bad. It's a 'frustration coping mechanism' when I get hurt, or sad. "Giving up" is a term that's too strong to use yet. Here's hoping you won't add to my ever growing list of regrets..... (c) copyright 1-12-06 Melia Teka |
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