I tracked Matthew James Paish down recently when he was selling shoes. I asked him whether, if he had a spare five minutes, he would mind answering
A Few Questions

Interview of Matthew James "The Bears" Paish conducted by the increasingly aggressive Phyl Taernvulle.

Phyl Taernvulle: Matthew James, how are you today?

Matthew James Paish: I’m okay.

PT: The Bears, many congratulations on your success. Do you feel that The Bears have really put Corsham and her environs on the map?

MJP: I do think The Bears have certainly brought traditional Wiltonian Rock into the 21^st Century in an odd vehicle. Nobody was expecting it. Their music is not straightforward; it’s not consistent, for it’s not about consistency. It is this sort of abandonment of false-duty (to operate with consistency, to waver above and below the rules but never to the side) which I think the local people feel when somebody mentions The Bears. You can see it in their ways. It is very much a collective enterprise. And that’s what the tourists come to see – that place in Wiltshire where small society has grown harmonious through a shared love of great music.  

PT: What colour trousers are you wearing?
MJP: Polar Bear White ‘Baggy Style’ Trousers. I have to wear them to sell The Shoes. Apparently.

PT: What was the last thing you ate?
MJP: Two Spicy Breaded Chicken Steaks topped with a variety of beans and pulses, and a cheeky splash of Tabasco. It’s a little bit filthy.

PT: If you were a crayon, what colour would you be?
MJP: Prussian blue²  - I understand it to be one of The Perfect Colours. The colour that could never be found in the Crayon Box at school; because it was far too beautiful for such young minds.
 
PT: What is the first thing you notice about people?
MJP: Spiritual beings interwoven into a spiritual universe which ultimately reflects an all-encompassing immanent God. (Ref: “All things are made of gods” - Mr. Bad, The Bears.)

PT: Summer or winter?
MJP: Summer. You can sit in SportsFields.

PT: What did you do last night?
MJP: I attended An Evening of Fire at 46 Donnington Road. It involved a steel container which was in our garden, wood from next door’s garden, and some fire lighters. A hobo’s paradise.

PT: What are your favourite smells?
MJP: Dinner, Wood, Petrol, Myself, Newly Made Cabinet Shelving, Creosote, Glossy Paper Magazines, Starch, Magic Smells.

PT: Who inspires you?
MJP: Dr. Tchock, B Hicks, L Da Vinci, G Swain, Jimi H, L Wittgenstein, Mr Rigg.

PT: What is your favourite day of the week?
MJP: On A Friday – Freyja’s day. When Venus’s charm lures away the day’s domestic daemons and you don’t have to do much. Sometimes I just sit down all day On A Friday – you can do that.

PT: What is your ideal holiday?

MJP: Ideally I’d go to Utopia – which of course, ideally, exists. Ideally, when I get there, there’s going to be all of my favourite things, and all of the things I don’t like will be somewhere else. In fact even the stuff I ‘don’t mind’ won’t be there – just the favourites. I’d also like to see Portugal and Africa.

PT: What are your plans for life?
MJP: I really have none. Life is a long time away – planning for it is like buying a car for your first son’s 21^st birthday when he’s still in your wife’s womb. The plans will certainly involve personal success though.

PT: What is the worst kind of torture you can think of?
MJP: The one where they force tiny foetuses into all your orifices, and repeat until you’re a just big pile of lifelessness. 

PT: What's the best thing you've ever heard?
MJP: "Spin City" by The Bears.

PT: What is your opinion on the Euro?
MJP: Hitler would have liked the Euro, but then Haider and Le Penn don’t. It's swings and roundabouts really isn’t it.

PT: What can we expect from The Bears in the future?
MJP: The same you have always expected. A polished glass goblet of bliss and side dish of excellence.

PT: What are your new year's resolutions?
MJP: To have another go at sticking to the ones from the last few years. Again. I think a ‘New Years Resolution’ is slightly oxymoronic – as they’re resolutions which are more than likely never going be resolved. Real problems are resolved when they need resolving – not at 12.00am, 1^st of January.