* * *
Dinner was spectacular. Sam had never felt better sitting with the two women he loved best in the world. It all came to an end suddenly when Josie announced that she had to put Sammy to bed. After she was sleeping the former couple made themselves comfortable in the lounge room.
Sam turned to Josie after a few uncomfortable minutes and said, "Jos, I think there is something I need to tell you."
Josie frowned, wrinkles forming on her forehead. Turning to Sam carefully and nodded, waiting.
"I'm in love with you. I've always been in love with you. Until the day I die, I'm going to be in love with you." Sam spoke softly, his words filling the air with romance.
Josie began to speak, but Sam put his finger to her mouth to stop her.
"Let me finish," Sam said. "I made a mistake - one terribly huge one. I know now that its probably too late to ever expect your love, your trust, or even your friendship. But by God, I want it. I want it all. I want your love; I want your trust; I want your friendship. Tell me that in time I can have one or even all those things…"
Josie scowled at Sam and stood up. Walking towards her fireplace she picked up a framed photo of Samantha and herself. She walked over to Sam and showed it to him.
"This photo was taken two days after Sammy's birth. You weren't there. In fact, you were probably comfortably bedded in with Lara by then," Josie said cattily. "In fact, I bet you didn't even give a damn Sam winced as he looked at the photo. He knew that Josie was only speaking the truth. Her anger was expected; he only hoped that after the anger and pain subsided, she could look at him again without hatred.
"Josie, I am so, so sorry." He was surprised to find tears welling up in his eyes. "I never forgot you or anything we had. Lara, she's...she's not you."
Sam turned and picked up his coat from the sofa. He turned to look one more time at Josie, who was leaning on the mantelpiece.
"I want you and need you, Jos. Nothing you can do or say will ever change that. You can hate me, but this I promise: I will not neglect our daughter. Now I know she exists, I intend to be here for her in every possible way. One day, I hope to regain your trust and love. But for now, I can only hope that you will let me be a part of our child's life."
Josie turned to look at him, respect finally fluttered through her eyes.
"Sam. I am not punishing our daughter because of you. You can see her whenever you like. I want her to have a father: the best father. You may not be the best boyfriend or lover, but I can sure as hell see that you will be the best daddy for my little girl."
Sam smiled sadly at the words and nodded at Josie. He put his arms through his jacket and began to walk to the door.
Josie was losing her one opportunity to tell her man how she felt, she felt him slipping away out of her grasp.
"Sam!" Josie called as his hand reached the handle.
Sam froze in mid-motion. His heart thumped. His sweat began to appear on his forehead. He trembled. He wondered. He hoped. In a second he had turned to face his love.
"Don't leave tonight. I don't expect anything from you except one night. One night where you remind me of how much you loved me...once."
Sam smiled with relief and hunger, throwing his jacket back onto the sofa. He marched over to Josie and kissed her passionately. Scooping her up, he laid her down onto the soft comfy floor in front of her fireplace piece and began his bid to make her feel like the woman he loved again.
"Are you sure, Josie?" he said between kisses. "I mean, this is a big step for someone who was just telling me they didn't want to know me," Sam whispered into her ear.
Sam's hot breath made her shiver. Josie nodded. "I need to feel loved by you again..."
Sam smiled at her again. Her honest devotion shone through even if she didn't want it to. That devotion, even after all he had done to her, struck a nerve within Sam. He couldn't do this to her - not when she was so vulnerable and obviously very confused.
"I cant do this, Jo… Not now…not like this. I love you too much to let things happen this way. You don't really want this, and until you want me the way I want you to have me, its not good for either for us. Do you understand?" Sam pleaded, still twirling her hair between his fingers absently.
Josie nodded and smiled. Tears glimmered in her eyes.
"I was kind of hoping you would say something like that. Now I know I can trust you," Josie said.
She got up and Sam followed meekly behind. He picked up his jacket as the door was opened for him.
"One day, Sam...I want us to be a family. Forever and Ever. I am glad you found it in your heart to stop yourself, to put my needs above yours," Josie said warmly as he walked out onto the porch.
Sam smiled back at her brilliantly. "You want to be a family? Oh Jos, that's so wonderful! I never thought I would hear that again." Sam hugged her tightly to him.
Josie suddenly pulled away as headlights came into vision. A car was speeding fast along the road and much too recklessly. Her instinct was that this was not a coincidence.
Oblivious, Sam backed away from Josie and stepped onto the gravel of the street, about to say his final good night.
The car in the street did not slow down. In fact, it seemed headed right for Josie's driveway…and Sam.
The sound of the car so close to him made Sam turn around, putting his hand up to shield his eyes from the glaring headlights. "Is that…?"
"Sam!! Watch out!" Josie screamed.
But it was too late. The car suddenly swerved toward Josie's driveway. Sam went underneath the front wheels and was instantly knocked unconscious when his head violently connected with the pavement.
Josie felt the tears burn her face as she ran to meet him.
Lara got out of the car, bristling with anger at seeing her rival running toward her.
But Josie's thoughts were only on Sam. "Sam! Oh Sam come back to me," Josie cried, dropping to her knees next to his limp body.
Lara bent down to survey the scene and suddenly her face crumbled.
"Oh my God, what have I done!! Sam, Oh God… I'm sorry." In shock, Lara reached down and tried to move Sam.
Josie screamed when Lara made the contact. Her fears were that Sam would either die or be paralyzed and she would never have the chance to let him know she loved him still the same.
"I'm sorry, Josie. I didn't even see him there. I was just so…angry and hurt. I just love him and he hurt me…again…" Lara begged for Josie's forgiveness.
Josie just looked at her blankly while stroking Sam's forehead softly. "Don't bother me with that now… Get inside and call an ambulance!"
Lara nodded and ran inside Josie's house.
Josie bent so that her head was next to Sam's. "Sam, if you can hear me, I want you to know how I feel about you. I care so much for you it kills me to see you. It hurts me to know you slept with another woman. It kills me to know that I still love you. It killed me to think of you for the past 2 years. And now I realize something. I still want to be with you. Today, Tomorrow Forever. Just don't die on me tonight. Not right now, when I have come to my senses…" Josie kissed his forehead softly, praying he could hear her…that it would give him the will to live.
The ambulance could be heard in the distance. Lara emerged from the house and sobbed uncontrollably on the porch, knowing that she was going to be in big trouble.
Josie held Sam tight whispering sweet nothings in his ear and praying that tonight would not be the last memory she had of her darling Sam.
* * *