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A Puppy's 12 Days of Christmas
A Dog's Rules for Christmas
Wrapping Presents with Dogs
On Christmas Morning...







A Puppy's 12 Days of Christmas

On the first day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
The Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the second day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.

On the third day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.

On the fourth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.

On the fifth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Five chewed-up stockings
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.

On the sixth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Six yards of soggy ribbon
Five chewed-up stockings
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.

On the seventh day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Seven scraps of wrapping paper
Six yards of soggy ribbon
Five chewed-up stockings
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.

On the eighth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Eight tiny reindeer fragments
Seven scraps of wrapping paper
Six yards of soggy ribbon
Five chewed-up stockings
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.

On the ninth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
My wreath in nine pieces
Eight tiny reindeer fragments
Seven scraps of wrapping paper
Six yards of soggy ribbon
Five chewed-up stockings
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.

On the tenth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Ten Christmas cards I shoulda mailed
My wreath in nine pieces
Eight tiny reindeer fragments
Seven scraps of wrapping paper
Six yards of soggy ribbon
Five chewed-up stockings
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.

On the eleventh day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Eleven unwrapped presents
Ten Christmas cards I shoulda mailed
My wreath in nine pieces
Eight tiny reindeer fragments
Seven scraps of wrapping paper
Six yards of soggy ribbon
Five chewed-up stockings
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.

On the twelfth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
A dozen puppy kisses And I forgot all about the other eleven days.

by Elise Lewis 1997

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Author Unknown



A Dog's Rules for Christmas

  1. Be especially patient with your humans during this time. They may appear to be more stressed-out than usual and they will appreciate long comforting dog leans.

  2. They may come home with large bags of things they call gifts. Do not assume that all the gifts are yours.

  3. Be tolerant if your humans put decorations on you. They seem to get some special kind of pleasure out of seeing how you look with fake antlers.

  4. They may bring a large tree into the house and set it up in a prominent place and cover it with lights and decorations. Bizarre as this may seem to you, it is an important ritual for your humans, so there are some things you need to know:
    1. Don't pee on the tree.
    2. Don't drink water in the container that holds the tree.
    3. Mind your tail when you are near the tree.
    4. If there are packages under the tree, even ones that smell interesting or that have your name on them, don't rip them open.
    5. Don't chew on the cord that runs from the funny-looking hole in the wall to the tree.
  5. Your humans may occasionally invite lots of strangers to come visit during this season. These parties can be lots of fun, but they also call for some discretion on your part:
    1. Not all strangers appreciate kisses and leans.
    2. Don't eat off the buffet table.
    3. Beg for goodies subtly.
    4. Be pleasant, even if unknowing strangers sit on your sofa.
    5. Don't drink out of glasses that are left within your reach.
  6. Likewise, your humans may take you visiting. Here your manners will also be important:
    1. Observe all the rules in #4 for trees that may be in other people's houses. (4a is particularly important)
    2. Respect the territory of other animals that may live in the house.
    3. Tolerate children.
    4. Turn on your charm big time.
  7. A big man with a white beard and a very loud laugh may emerge from your fireplace in the middle of the night.

DON'T BITE HIM!!


Wrapping Presents with Dogs

  1. Gather presents, boxes, paper, etc. in middle of living room floor.
  2. Get tape back from puppy.
  3. Remove scissors from older dog's mouth.
  4. Open box.
  5. Take puppy out of box.
  6. Remove tape from older dog's mouth.
  7. Take scissors away from puppy.
  8. Put present in box.
  9. Remove present from puppy's mouth.
  10. Put back in box after removing puppy from box.
  11. Take scissors from older dog and sit on them.
  12. Remove puppy from box and put on lid.
  13. Take tape away from older dog.
  14. Unroll paper.
  15. Take puppy OFF box.
  16. Cut paper being careful not to cut puppy's foot or nose that is getting in the way as he "helps."
  17. Let puppy tear remaining paper.
  18. Take puppy off box.
  19. Wrap paper around box.
  20. Remove puppy from box and take wrapping paper from its mouth.
  21. Tell older dog to fetch the tape so he will stop stealing it.
  22. Take scissors away from puppy.
  23. Take tape older dog is holding.
  24. Quickly tape one spot before taking scissors from older dog and sitting on them again.
  25. Fend off puppy trying to steal tape and tape another spot.
  26. Take bow from older dog.
  27. Go get roll of wrapping paper puppy ran off with.
  28. Take scissors from older dog who took them when you got up.
  29. Give pen to older dog to hold so he stops licking your face.
  30. Remove puppy from present and hurriedly slap tape on to hold the paper on.
  31. Take now soggy bow from puppy and tape on since the sticky stuff no longer sticks.
  32. Take pen from older dog, address tag and affix while puppy tries to eat pen.
  33. Grab present before puppy opens it and put it away.
  34. Clean up mess puppy and older dog made playing tug-of-war with remnants of wrapping paper.
  35. Put away rest of wrapping supplies and tell dogs what good helpers they are.



On Christmas Morning...

I wish, for every dog searching trash cans for breakfast, a filled bowl with his name printed in bright letters.

For every dog who slept fitfully last night, chained in a frozen yard, a soft, warm bed with a person snoring gently nearby.

For every shelter dog, spending Christmas morning in a soiled run, a forever home filled with sounds and smells of family.

For every "Christmas" pup given today, a tolerant, caring owner who won't abandon you as you grow into a real dog.

For every ailing pet, enough money for your owner to pay the bills to make you well.

For every lost dog, a clear, safe road and well marked path to lead you home.

For every old and tired friend, a warm fire and soft bed to ease your aches and pains.

For every Heart Dog at the Bridge, a moment when you know that you are remembered today, missed again and loved forever.

Author Unknown

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