| Godzilla's Revenge (1969) |
| Rating: 3 1/2 Severed Heads |
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| Synopsis: Anyone who knows us well knows that we love Godzilla movies. But in the case of Godzilla's Revenge, (which is widely regarded as one of the worst Godzilla movies ever) even we cringed in our seats. The only Godzilla movie (to my mind) where Godzilla isn't even the main focus of the movie (in fact, I think almost all the footage of Godzilla is from Son of Godzilla & Godzilla vs. The Sea Monster)! The film follows a Japanese boy in very short shorts named Ichiro who is teased by bullies and imagines what it would be like to trip out on LSD on Monster Island. The boy imagines befriending Godzilla's son Minilla (who may or may not have Down's Syndrome) who discovers his strength to fight Gabara (a monster who looks like Godzilla with a unicorn horn has mated with Carrot Top). Ichiro learns he must discover his inner strength as well if he is to ever overcome the bullies that tease him (one of which is named Gabara, get it). The dream sequences come at some of the most unexpected points giving you the same feeling as if you had slammed 50 shots of Tequila, only with more vomiting. In particular, when Ichiro has a run in with bank robbers and we're left trying to figure out what's going on in not one, but two differnet plot lines. This movie is hilarious! |
| What Has This Movie Taught Us? -Taking acid and writing Godzilla movies is not as cool as it sounds -Train drivers regularly stop the train on the tracks to get out, sit down, and talk to each other -Random acts of violence & vandalism are all right as long as they impress people -The power of Godzilla lies within all of us, and we should use this power... to dominate the world! |
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| Memorable Moments: 06min- This is a Godzilla movie? 07min- Is that kid a future Sumo wrestler or what?. 11min- Isn't that computer a Dell? 13min- Kamacuras dribbles the ball, passes to Godzilla, he shoots, he scores!!! 18min- Did Minilla get hit in the head with a hammer to be that stupid? 29min- People just walk into my house all the time too 32min- Minilla has no friends... Are you suprised? 43min- A father - son moment 51min- That did not just happen! I did not see that! |
| Don't Quote Us On That: Ichiro: "It sure is murder when you're so darn small." Ichiro: "Do ya ever fight?" Millilla: "Golly no, I'm chicken." Ichiro: "I know how that is." Minilla: "Why do ya say that?' Ichiro: "We've both got a Gabara." Minilla: "Go get em Godzilla!" Minilla: "Godzilla says we have to fight our own battles and not be cowards." |
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