Chapter 16

Oblivious to her father’s increasing nervousness and her mother’s corresponding excitement, Katie had been chattering all the way from Manitou. Now on familiar territory, she had appointed herself her father’s own personal tour guide and continually pointed out areas she knew, particular places where she could remember events in her life occurring, and even some details of the local wildlife she’d learned from her mother and her siblings.

Now, as they neared home her excitement knew no bounds. "I’ll show ya my room pa …. an’ maybe we can go fishin’ …. I bet Matthew an’ Colleen an’ Brian an’ Andrew’ll be waitin’ for us too …. I can’t wait!"

Joseph swallowed his nervousness and put on a brave face. He gave his daughter a loving squeeze and glanced across to catch Michaela’s sympathetic gaze. She smiled at him reassuringly and he smiled tensely in return.

As the homestead came into view in the distance, he suddenly drew the buggy to a halt. "That’s it aint it?" he murmured under his breath.

Not hearing his quiet utterance, Katie turned on him indignantly. "Why’re ya stoppin’ papa?" she demanded. "We’re nearly home."

Michaela grasped her hand and said softly. "Just give your pa a minute sweetheart …. remember he hasn’t seen the homestead before …. or at least he doesn’t remember it …"

Katie looked suitably chastened and lowered her head. "I’m sorry ma … I forgot …" She looked up at her father. "Its pretty aint it pa? …. The kids at school say it’s the prettiest house in Colorado Springs …."

Joseph continued to gaze upon the homestead and outbuildings, nestled into the hillside, surrounded by untouched woodlands. "You’re right Katie," he said softly. "It is real pretty."

Michaela smiled and caressed his arm lovingly. "Why are you so surprised? You picked the setting …. you designed and built the house …. There is something of you in every board …. every little extra … whether you remember it or not." In response he reached out and grasped her hand in gratitude, then nodded and asserted nervously, "Then lets go home" before flicking the reins and setting them in motion once more.

****************************

Yet again Colleen began to nervously fiddle with the flowers arranged in a vase in the centre of the table in the homestead living-room. As soon as Michaela’s wire from Manitou had arrived early this morning she’d left Andrew to look after the clinic and come out here. Brian and Matthew had followed soon after, and in the ensuing hours wood had been cut, fires set, beds aired and changed and an apple pie and a chocolate cake, both Sully’s favourites, sat cooling on the kitchen table.

For the past hour Brian had been pacing the floor between the front door and the bay windows and Colleen had redusted and rearranged umpteen dozen things that didn’t need redusting or rearranging.

Matthew chuckled. "You two’ll be so worn out by the time they git home you’ll be fallin’ asleep. Why don’ ya just sit down an’ be patient." Two pairs of offended eyes turned on him. "Look," he advised. "You’ve waited more ‘an four years ta see Sully agin …. another coupla hours aint gonna hurt …"

Brian slumped into the chair beside him. "Its alright for you Matthew …. You’ve seen him …. but me an’ Colleen aint …. an’ it aint just the waitin’," he said worriedly. "Whatdya say ta him …. when he don’ know ya?"

Matthew smiled. "Like Dr Mike said …. ya just gotta remember he’s the same fella he always was …. an’ if ya wanna talk about somethin’ in the past … talk about it … but fill in the details a bit for him …. Remember she said in her letter that’s what Katie’s bin doin’ ever since he found out …."

Brian nodded and agitatedly rose from the chair again, unable to sit still. "I just wish they’d git here," he murmured. He strode across the room to glance at the clock on the kitchen mantle. "I thought they’d be here by now," he added churlishly.

He once again pulled back the lace curtain to peer down the road. He blinked and tried to focus. His heart began to race. "They’re here!" he exclaimed. "They’re home!"

Colleen nervously straightened her skirt and patted at her hair. How she wished Andrew was here with her. He’d know what to say. She trailed her brothers out onto the front porch and following the direction of their eyes, watched the buggy slowly approach.

Almost before it had fully stopped, Katie had clambered down, run the short distance to the steps and thrown herself into her youngest brother’s arms. He picked her up, his arms enfolding her. "I missed ya so much Brian," she exclaimed. She suddenly squirmed in his arms wanting to be placed down and then wrapped her arms around Colleen’s waist. "I missed you too Colleen." She looked around. "Where’s Andrew?" she asked expectantly.

"He had to stay at the clinic until it closed sweetheart," Colleen explained distractedly, her eyes fixed on her father who had climbed down from the buggy and was now lifting her ma down. He kept glancing across at them. With a leaping heart, she noted how he had Michaela’s hand firmly clasped in his own as they rounded the buggy and approached. She took a deep breath and prepared to step forward, but was forestalled by Matthew who held out his hand, and said cheerily, "Hey Sully …. ah …. Joseph …. welcome home," and then reddened a little at his faux pas.

Joseph suddenly smiled, realising that his children were as nervous as he. He shook Matthew’s hand and said quietly, even reassuringly, "Its alright Matthew …. I’m gittin’ used ta answerin’ by either name …. only don’ be surprised if occasionally I don’ realise who ya talkin’ to .." He clapped the young man on the back. "Its good ta see ya agin …"

Hearing his father’s familiar voice and recognising those same gestures from the past, Brian was suddenly overcome. He took a hesitant step forward. "Hey pa …," he said quietly. "I’m Brian …"

Joseph appeared to be studying the young man intently and then he smiled and held out his hand. "Hey Brian," he returned. "I was just tryin’ ta figure whether the little fella I remember could really be you …. You’ve grown some …" He grinned as Brian grasped his hand and then moved in closer to give him a quick hug.

"It *is* me pa … an’ yeah …. I have sorta grown a little," he said with a smile. "You aint changed much though … ‘cept for the shorter hair …"

"Yeah … I saw a photograph of how I used ta wear it ….," agreed Joseph. His eyes suddenly alighted on Colleen who had been standing quietly observing the greetings. "Hey Colleen," he said softly. "You’re even prettier than the photograph I saw …"

The young woman blushed. "Hey pa," she replied. "I’m real glad you’re home …" Joseph’s eyes flew around the smiling group and then upwards to the attractive homestead before him and he smiled again. "Yeah … I’m glad to be home too," he rejoined sincerely. He pulled Michaela in against himself and gave her a loving squeeze (an action duly noted by the three older siblings). "Well," he said, turning and picking up two bags, his own and Katie’s, from the back of the buggy, "We better git this luggage inside huh?"

"Me an’ Brian’ll take care of it Sully …. Why don’ you go on in …. an’ we’ll follow ya in a minute," offered Matthew, already moving to the rear of the buggy.

Before Sully could reply, Michaela was tugging him towards the steps and leading him up to the door. At the top of the steps he paused and turned to look out over the beautiful, mountainous landscape before him. He shook his head.

"What’s the matter Sully?" asked Michaela anxiously.

Joseph smiled at her. "Aint nothin’ the matter," he said quietly but reassuringly. "I was just wonderin’ how a man could forget somethin’ as pretty as this …" He turned back to her, kissed the top of her head and prepared to enter. As he did he dropped his bag and ran his hand over the bevelled glass inset in the front door, then chuckled. He eyed Michaela and suggested with a wry grin, "Bet this was your idea …"

"Why? Don’t you like it?"

"Oh I like it well enough …. But I doubt I woulda thought of it …."

It was Michaela’s turn to chuckle "One day I’ll tell you all about it ….It was … ah …. an interesting incident in our courtship …. Now come inside."

**********************

Katie dragged her father up the stairs impatiently. "I’ll show ya everythin’ papa," she exclaimed. Michaela and Colleen, their arms secured around each other’s waists followed behind, smiling at the little one’s enthusiasm. The little girl pushed open the first door on the right. "This used ta be Colleen’s room …. then Matthew stayed here until he moved inta town again …. now we use it for guests …. like grandma ….," she explained.

Joseph followed her in and then, much to Michaela’s chagrin, dropped his bag on the counterpane. Colleen felt the tensing in her mother’s body and turned in time to observe her schooling her features to hide her disappointment. The younger woman’s eyes narrowed. It was obvious that Sully still cared deeply for her mother, you could see it in his eyes and the way he touched her, but it seemed that they had not yet resumed all aspects of their marriage. Her heart went out to her ma. They’d had such a loving relationship before his disappearance. She knew it would be a tragedy if that was never to come to full fruition again. In order to distract Michaela, Colleen suggested, "Hey Katie … why don’ you show pa your room .. an’ me an’ ma’ll make sure the boys put the bags an’ trunk where they should go."

The eager little girl needed no further bidding. She grasped her pa’s hand and tugged him out the door and further down the landing. "This is my room down here pa … remember you said you were gonna make me a new bed ……"

Michaela and Colleen watched them go, Colleen’s look indulgent, her ma’s wistful.

***********************

Colleen turned back from the oven, where she’d just checked on the roasting joint, to observe her mother, knife and half-peeled potato in hand, staring out the window. She walked quietly across to look over Michaela’s shoulder. Katie was guiding her father towards the barn, skipping along beside him and chattering merrily. Colleen chuckled. "Don’ remember the last time I saw Katie so excited," she remarked softly.

Startled from her reverie, Michaela jumped and then smiled. "No …. neither do I …. She gets on so well with him …. It doesn’t seem to worry her at all that he doesn’t remember her …."

At that moment Sully suddenly swept Katie up into his arms, turned her upside down, then abruptly set her back on her feet. The little girl’s squeals of delight had both women laughing out loud.

"He’s just the same aint he ma?" mused Colleen quietly, her eyes still fixed on her pa. "I … I…. thought he’d be different somehow ….. but you almost forget …. until he gets that puzzled look on his face …. or doesn’ know where something is …"

Michaela nodded in reply and grasped her daughter’s hand. "You’ll never know what it means to me to have him back," she said quietly. "After all this time …. thinking he was gone forever …."

"I can guess ma …. I know how I’d feel if anythin’ happened to Andrew ….. an’ I know what you two mean to each other …. we all do …. we watched ya fall in love from the beginning …. remember …" Michaela’s hand tightened on hers, prompting Colleen to add, "Everything is goin’ alright with you two isn’t it? You don’ seem ….. well ….." She shrugged her shoulders, groping for the right words. "You don’t seem as …. as ….. happy as I thought you’d be ….," she finally concluded.

Michaela reddened but said instantly, "Oh I’m happy Colleen …. *very* happy …. But well …. its … its …. not easy to just pick things up from where we left off …. He still doesn’t remember any of our life together ….. before …. or *after* we were married … so we’re a married couple …. but we’re not …" She shook her head in frustration. "That probably doesn’t make any sense at all …."

Colleen placed her arm around Michaela’s shoulder. "Its alright ma …. It does make sense …. You just have to be patient …. Sully loves you …. just as much as he did before …. you can see it in the way he looks at you …. just like he always did …. But I guess this is all kinda new to him …hmm?"

Michaela gently caressed her daughter’s hand resting on her shoulder. "I know you’re right …. In fact I was told exactly the same thing by Sully’s friend Doc …. and I know its impatience I feel …. but I can’t help it ….." Her eyes once more turned towards the barn.

Colleen grasped her mother’s shoulders and gently turned her around. "Come on ma …. we’ve gotta finish makin’ supper …. Before ya know it everything’ll be back ta normal around here …. You just see …"

Michaela looked her very grown-up daughter in the eye and smiled. "You’re right of course …. I *do* just have to be patient …." She lowered her eyes. "Perhaps things will never be *exactly* as they were before …. But I’d like *some* things to return to normal …" She looked up to catch a decided twinkle in her daughter’s eyes and blushed. She quickly turned back to the table and resumed her task of peeling enough potatoes for the entire family’s supper.

**************************

Matthew sat back and observed his family as they enjoyed their first meal together in more than four years. Katie kept everyone entertained with stories of her exploits in Paynesville and their return journey. She was plainly excited to be home and her relationship with her father was one Matthew very much admired. She seemed to care little for the fact that he’d been missing for more than four years, or that he had no memories of her early childhood. She patiently explained things to him, showed him where things were kept and when someone’s name was mentioned, made a point of ensuring that her pa knew who they spoke of.

But to the earnest, caring young man, the dynamics between Dr Mike and Sully were the most intriguing. He was experiencing a strange sense of d�j� vu, of days past at the old homestead when the two of them were courting. The same long looks, the constant need to be close, to touch, the seeming ability to convey to each other what they were thinking without the need for words, the electric tension; the signs were all there, all familiar, at least to him. They’d certainly come a long way since he’d left them in Paynesville a few weeks earlier. Back then he’d wondered if Dr Mike would actually succeed in her quest to bring Sully home, and he’d had no idea that their relationship would develop to the degree it already had. Earlier, Colleen had mentioned to him the fact that Sully apparently intended to sleep in the guestroom. In some ways he could understand that; they’d only had a few weeks to re-establish their relationship, but watching them together he was a little surprised. He smiled to himself. He figured it wouldn’t be too long before they were together again, if their present demeanour was anything to go by.

He was suddenly conscious of the fact that Dr Mike was trying to gain everyone’s attention. When at last the previously animated conversation ceased, she said softly, "Sully and I want to ask a favour of everyone …. We talked about this on the way home …. and we need your cooperation …" When there were encouraging nods and interested looks, she continued, "We’d appreciate it if you’d keep Sully’s return quiet for a couple of days … to give him a chance to settle in …. perhaps have a look around before he has to cope with a lot of inquisitive strangers …. well strangers to him anyway …."

"Its gonna be hard ta keep it quiet ma," Matthew advised, his eyes flicking over his littlest sister.

More astute than he realised, Katie turned on him indignantly. "I can keep a secret Matthew …. I aint a baby …"

Matthew chuckled and conceded. "You’re right little one … you aint a baby anymore …. I forgot …"

"What about Katie going back to school ma?" asked Colleen. "When folks see her … they’re gonna think you’re home too … Why, Horace was asking about you just the other day … some folks’ve been worried about you and what you’ve been doing away for so long …." She paused and then added, "And if people think you’re home …. they might come visiting …."

Michaela looked over at Sully. "What do you think?" she asked.

"Well …. I’d appreciate just a couple of days …. ta git the lay of the land … find my way round here …. an’ maybe a little further afield …," he replied hopefully.

Michaela looked across at her youngest daughter. "How would you feel about another couple of days at home before returning to school?" she asked, almost certain of the reply.

Katie suddenly beamed. "Two more days!" she exclaimed. "Here with you an’ papa? Her eyes narrowed. "You always say I gotta go ta school," she accused.

"Well yes," replied Michaela with a smile. "But I think this is a special occasion … just this once …"

"Yippee!" cheered the little girl, bounding out of her chair to wrap her arms around her mother’s shoulders. "Thank-you mama."

Brian suddenly interjected. "Ma … I got a feelin’ Miss Grace an’ Robert E won’t be waitin’ a couple more days …. They’re real anxious to see you an’ pa …. I figure they’ll be visitin’ sometime tomorrow …"

"An’ Miss Dorothy an’ Cloud Dancin’ are likely to turn up too …," added Matthew.

Michaela glanced anxiously across at Sully who suddenly smiled. "Its alright Michaela …. I already know Dorothy an’ Cloud Dancin’ an’ hearin’ all ‘bout Grace an’ Robert E from you an’ Katie … I feel I know them too …" His eyes roved over the members of his smiling family grouped around the table. "It’ll be fine," he said decisively. "In fact I’m almost lookin’ forward to it."

**************************

Joseph paused as he came down the stairs, so he could observe his wife without her realising. She was refilling a couple of lamps where the oil had run low and the dry wicks wouldn’t light. He loved just watching her; the way her silky hair shimmered in the firelight, the way her hips swayed when she moved, the way she bit her lip when she was concentrating on something. He’d never have believed that a woman could stir him so.

He leapt down the remaining few steps, rounded the fireplace, dropping a couple of articles on the living-room table as he did so, and strode over to stand behind her. He wrapped his arms around her waist and rested his chin on her shoulder. "Thank-you for lettin’ me put Katie ta bed … an’ read her story," he said softly against her ear. "She went right to sleep."

"She always does …. and she had quite a day."

Joseph chuckled. "We all did." And then added sincerely, "Every time I think about that beautiful little girl bein’ mine it makes my heart miss a beat …"

Michaela put down the pitcher and leant back against him. She reached up to cup his cheek with her hand. "She fell in love with you almost as quickly as I did .."

"She did huh?"

"Mmmm…."

"Almost?"

Michaela turned to face him and stood up on her tiptoes, to look deep into his eyes. "No-one could fall for you as quickly as I did …. or as deeply …," she murmured lovingly.

He bent to kiss her tenderly. Then pulled back. "Well … lettin’ me do those fatherly things for Katie made me feel more at home."

"You *are* home Sully," she said softly.

"I know it," he returned, his voice low. "Still feels kinda strange though …"

"It won’t for long," she advised sympathetically. "I’m sure of it." She rested her cheek against his chest.

Noting her relaxed state Joseph said softly, "You had a big day too …. Why don’ ya go on up ta bed …. I’ll put out the lamps and lock up …"

Michaela swallowed. She so desperately wanted him to add ‘and join you in a minute’, but the longed for words didn’t come. She nodded and stepped back from him a little. "You had a big day too," she remarked, her voice unintentionally husky.

Joseph lowered his eyes to the floor. "Yeah … you’re right," he agreed softly. He nodded towards the living-room table where a writing tablet, pen and ink sat waiting for him. "But I’m gonna write ta Doc before I go ta bed … so’s Brian can post the letter tomorrow for me …. let Doc know we arrived safely …"

To both their ears the ruse was obvious, and Joseph had difficulty meeting her eyes. She nodded, gently kissed his cheek, whispered "Goodnight" and slowly climbed the stairs to her room.

Joseph watched her go. Her slumped shoulders told him all he needed to know. Why was he holding back? She’d let him know what she wanted and he wanted it too, desperately so. He just wasn’t sure about the timing. Everything was too new. His life had suddenly taken so many twists and turns. He shook his head ruefully, sat down at the table and opened the ink bottle.

Chapter 17

Joseph woke to a blinding pain in his head causing him to squint against the morning sunlight streaming in through the bedroom window. He cursed silently to himself the return of his once familiar headaches. He rubbed his hand across his forehead and thrust back the covers to let the cooling air reach his heated skin. Years ago, this had been a regular occurrence – the blinding headache, the cold sweat, the intolerance to light. Only once in the past year or so had it recurred, and that had been the day he’d ridden out alone with Michaela for the first time.

He wondered what time it was. The family would be expecting him to be present at breakfast, but the thought of food turned his stomach. As his skin cooled, he began to shiver and pulled the covers up again. Perhaps it was early enough that the headache might subside before he was missed. He closed his eyes and tried to relax, willing the pain to ease.

Michaela dished out healthy serves of oatmeal for Katie and Brian and then once again glanced worriedly towards the stairs. It was unlike Sully, or at least the Sully she knew, to rise late. Invariably, in all the time she’d known him, he would be up shortly after dawn, ready to greet the new day.

Brian, watching her, suddenly said, "Go on ma … check on him … we’ll finish breakfast …"

Michaela wondered whether this was the right thing to do. She was afraid of intruding on his privacy. His reluctance to be with her last night had convinced her there was still some way to go before they could be totally at ease with each other once more. She again looked over at the staircase. What could be keeping him? At last, after another gentle urging from Brian, she wiped her hands on her apron and headed upstairs.

At Sully’s door she paused and then tapped lightly. There was no answer. She tapped a little harder, adding a soft "Sully? Breakfast’s ready …" There was a low moan from the other side of the door and then a strained "I aint hungry." Recognising the pain in his voice, Michaela ignored the inferred dismissal and quietly opened the door. Upon seeing him in obvious distress, she moved quickly across to the bed and perched herself on the edge. "Sully?" she asked softly. His brow creased in pain. She reached out and laid her hand on his forehead. "Another headache?" she ventured. He nodded and grasped her hand in his. "Just a headache?" she asked with concern. "Uh huh …," he replied tensely. She withdrew her hand from his, tenderly traced the scar on his forehead with her fingertip and then said, "I’ll get you something for the pain."

Not too many minutes later she returned with a steaming cup of willow bark tea. She placed it on the night-stand and helped him prop himself up against the pillows to drink. "This should help," she said tenderly, brushing his damp hair back from his forehead. She watched him silently drink for a minute. When the cup was all but empty, she said quietly, "When this happened in Paynesville, you said that it helped to get out into the woods …. Do you think it would help here?"

"Maybe," was his pained reply.

She nodded and suggested, "We’ll give you an hour or so … for the pain to ease …. and if you’re up to it … we’ll give it a try …. Katie will enjoy it too …"

He placed the cup on the night-stand and slid back down under the covers, his eyes closed, his brow still creased in pain. "We’ll see ….," he replied weakly.

She bent to kiss his forehead lovingly and quietly left the room.

Michaela drew the wagon to a halt at a once familiar clearing in the woods. Katie immediately hopped down and headed towards the creek. "You be careful sweetheart," called Michaela to her daughter’s fast receding back.

The little girl turned around and called, "I aint goin’ far ma …. There’re good frogs down here …," and then turned again and broke into a run.

Michaela chuckled and shook her head. She turned to observe Sully who was gingerly alighting from the wagon, then she walked to the rear and took out a blanket and a number of utensils. She spread a blanket on the ground in a space surrounded by a number of old, gnarled trees and turned to Sully. "You sit there …. I’m going to get a fire started …. I’ll make you some more tea …"

Still in considerable pain, Joseph nodded gratefully and sank down onto the blanket, leaning back against a thick tree trunk. He closed his eyes and breathed in the cool, fresh air. There was something about being in the woods that always refreshed him, put him at ease. Subconsciously he registered the familiar sounds of Michaela lighting a fire and of water being poured into a pot. Then he felt her sit down close beside him, her body warm against his. "Here …. drink this …. then turn a little," she said quietly. "With your back to me …." He opened one eye and regarded her quizzically. "Trust me," she said, grasping his shoulders gently and turning him so that he could lean back on her a little. The next minute her fingers were lightly massaging his temples and scalp in a soothing, rhythmic pattern. He sighed and relaxed against her. "Good?" she asked softly. "Uh huh," he whispered in return. For many minutes, only the sounds of the surrounding woods and its creatures could be heard as Michaela continued her gentle ministrations. At last she felt him totally relax and his breathing deepened as he drifted off to sleep.

Sitting here like this, Michaela could almost convince herself that the past four years had never happened. This was their place, the place where they’d come so often during the year of their engagement and since - to make plans, to talk of their dreams for their future together. She closed her eyes and focussed on the feel of him in her arms, his hard body against hers. At times like this her heart would swell with her love for him. She suddenly realised that the tables had been turned. From the moment she’d met him, he’d been looking out for her, protecting her, considering her feelings, her reservations, giving her all his love unconditionally. Now she was the one protecting him, she was the one with the experience, the confidence in them as a couple. She lightly kissed his neck just below his ear. She needed him to know that her love was unconditional also, that it didn’t matter to her whether or not he ever regained those lost memories. What did matter was that they were together again. She gazed around at the nearby scenery, the key to such treasured memories of their life together, and sighed.

"Whatcha thinkin’?" asked Sully, his voice blurred from sleep.

Michaela jumped and tightened her hold on him. "Oh … ah … lots of things," she replied softly. "How are you feeling?"

"A little better …. Whatever that tea was …. it seems ta be workin’."

"Its willow bark … a Cheyenne remedy …. You and Cloud Dancing introduced me to it … Now I use it with many of my patients …. and so do Colleen and Andrew …"

He grasped her hand in his, his thumb stroking her palm. "Its peaceful here huh?"

"Mmm …. this is a special place you know?"

"It is?"

"Uh huh …. We used to come here often … when we were courting … and then during our engagement …"

Joseph looked up at her, a cheeky smile on his face. "Ta do what?" he asked innocently.

Michaela blushed and then smirked good-naturedly at him. "To talk," she said adamantly. "To make plans …."

The smile suddenly disappeared from Joseph’s face. "I bet the plannin’ never included me disappearin’ huh?"

Michaela closed her eyes and took a deep breath as the familiar feelings of desolation and loneliness washed over her. She instinctively tightened her hold on him. She swallowed and said softly, "So many things have happened to us over the years …. things we could never have planned for …. but we had to face them anyway." Tears suddenly glimmered in her eyes as she added, "Such things are much easier to face when we’re together …."

"What sorta things?" asked Joseph, turning to face her.

Michaela shrugged her shoulders, wondering how she’d got herself into this predicament and how to get out of it.

"Tell me Michaela …," Joseph insisted.

She lowered her eyes to the ground. "Um …. I told you a little about the time you spent in hiding …"

"Uh huh …. an’ I asked Cloud Dancin’ about it too ….," Joseph agreed quietly. "Musta bin real hard for you …. an’ the kids ….."

"It was ….. but I came to realise it was just as difficult for you …."

"What else?" Joseph reiterated, suddenly wondering whether he really wanted to know.

"There was the time I was abducted by dog soldiers …"

He drew in a sharp breath. "When?"

"When we were courting …. They attacked the town … they thought I was responsible for the arrival of Custer and his men …. You and I went out to collect a patient from an outlying property … they found us there …"

"What happened?" Joseph took a deep breath.

"An indian called One Eye took me back to their camp …. You had no horse and so couldn’t follow us…. but you spent the next three days searching for me …. I knew you were …. I could almost feel your presence with me ….."

"Did they ….. did they …. hurt you?"

Michaela’s eyes took on a faraway look. "No," she whispered. "But they tried …. Cloud Dancing’s son Walks On Clouds stopped them …"

"I didn’ know Cloud Dancin’ had a son …"

"He doesn’t now …. They killed him …"

"My God … for helpin’ you?"

"Uh huh …."

Joseph’s face paled. "There’s so much I don’ know …. don’ understand …."

Michaela leant forward to kiss him lightly. "You can’t know everything right away," she said softly. "And there are as many good things happened to us as bad …. Eventually you’ll know about them all …."

"I guess," replied Joseph. He ran his hand agitatedly through his hair. "Its so frustratin’ though …. Sometimes I think I remember what you’re talkin’ about an’ then I wonder whether its just my imagination playin’ tricks …."

"Its probably a little of both," consoled Michaela. "The fact that you remember some things is so promising …. It means that everything might one day come back …. We just have to be patient …."

"I know it …. Cloud Dancing told me the same thin’ …. but its hard …"

Michaela gave him a wry smile. "I agree," she murmured, with just a touch of irony. Again she kissed him lightly. A sudden frightened yelp and a splash disturbed the serenity and two heads swivelled northwards. Joseph clambered up. "I’ll go check on her," he said, moving swiftly away along the creek line. Moments later he returned with Katie held gingerly out in front of him. She was wet from waist to toe, her soaked dress and pinafore clinging to her legs, water dripping freely to the ground. He placed her down and she looked sheepishly over at her ma. Her lip trembling, she said contritely, "I … I … slipped on a rock mama … he was such a big frog …."

As the little girl began to shiver, Michaela said lovingly, "Oh sweetie …. come here …." Now shivering in earnest, the little girl moved awkwardly across to her ma. "We’ll have to get you out of these wet things won’t we," said Michaela lovingly. "Sully … will you get the extra blanket from the wagon for me?" she asked. She turned her daughter around and began to undo the buttons on her pinafore and dress. Joseph quickly returned with the blanket and sat down again beside Michaela who was preparing to draw the soaked dress off her daughter’s shoulders. Suddenly Katie crossed her arms in front of herself and turned coy eyes on her mother. "Ma," she protested. "He’s watchin’!"

Michaela chuckled. "Its alright sweetheart …. He’s your father … remember …."

Katie lowered her eyes to the ground and blushed. "I don’ wan’ him watchin’ mama," she murmured, keeping her arms crossed.

Joseph, perceiving his daughter’s discomfit, stood. "I’ll … ah … just git some more wood for the fire an’ rig up somethin’ to dry off her things huh …." He moved away quickly, leaving his wife and daughter alone. When he returned, a subdued Katie had been bundled into the blanket and was sitting on Michaela’s knee. She watched with interest as he quickly erected a contraption of light branches on which to hang her wet clothing. When he’d finished he settled down next to them and gently ruffled his daughter’s fine, honey-coloured hair. "Alright now?" he asked. She nodded and leant across to give him a quick hug. "Are ya warm?" he added. Again she nodded shyly. "Good," he responded with a smile. "You two ladies sit there …. nice an’ warm … I’m gonna take another nap …. til those clothes are dry … alright?" He slid down until he was laying prone and closed his eyes.

When he woke, perhaps an hour later, it was to discover Michaela’s loving eyes on him and his daughter nowhere in sight. "Where’s Katie?" he asked. Michaela indicated a spot a little way up the creek bank where the little girl was sitting, now fully clothed again, watching the water intently, a stick in her hand. He chuckled wryly, "Seems I still got a ways ta go with her huh?"

Michaela smiled and leant across to brush his hair back from his forehead. "Not so very far," she replied lovingly.

"Don’ seem that way to me …"

Michaela giggled. "Even if you’d been around all these years she’d probably still have reacted that way you know …. little girls become coy very early …."

"Are ya sure?"

"Mmmm."

"This bein’ a father stuff is kinda new ta me …. I got a lot ta learn …."

"No you don’t … you never did," rejoined Michaela. "Its instinctive with you …. You seem to know what to say … what to do …. just as you did a little while ago with Katie …. and as you did when Brian was a small boy …. Its me who had to learn ….."

"Don’ look that way now …."

"Oh it was …. I assure you," replied Michaela with a smile. "You helped me so much when I suddenly had three children to care for …. and I didn’t have a clue how to go about it …."

"Well we musta done alright …. they turned out pretty good …."

"They certainly did …. We have a lot to be thankful for …," Michaela avowed softly. She bent down and gave him a quick kiss. "Speaking of having things to be thankful for …. we’ll have to get going soon ….. if we’re likely to have guests this afternoon …." She again ran her fingertip over the scar on his forehead. "If you’re up to it," she added. "How’s the headache?"

"Nearly gone …. An’ yeah …. I reckon I’m ready …. You think a lot of these friends – Grace an’ Robert E – don’ ya?"

"Uh huh …. We chose them as Katie’s godparents …. and they’ve been so wonderful to me … the whole family …. these past few years ….."

Sully sat up and glanced across to his little daughter. He turned back to Michaela, gave her a quick kiss and stood. "Come on then," he said with a smile. "Lets go prepare for our guests …"

************************

The sound of a wagon rumbling into the yard brought Michaela and Katie out onto the homestead porch and Joseph poking his head out of the barn. As soon as the wagon had come to a full halt little Ellen clambered down and into her best friend’s arms. Grace and Robert E followed close behind her. Michaela quickly moved down the front steps and embraced a beaming Grace.

"Ooh … its so good ta have you back Dr Mike," exclaimed the caf� owner, giving her friend a hug. Her eyes were darting from side to side, and then up to the front door. "Where is he?" she asked excitedly. Michaela smiled indulgently and nodded towards a point over Grace’s shoulder. She swung around and her hand went to her mouth and her shining brown eyes widened. "My God!" she exclaimed, tears suddenly very close. "I can’t believe it!"

Joseph was advancing slowly towards them, a nervous smile on his face. He paused before the three adults. "Hey," he said quietly, and held out his hand.

Robert E grasped it first and shook it heartily. "You’ve taken my breath away Sully," he said emotionally, but with his typical touch of gruffness. "After all this time …. Its good ta have ya back …."

"Thanks Robert E," replied Joseph, immediately taking to the man’s quiet, unassuming manner.

Grace gasped. "You know us Sully?!" she exclaimed.

Joseph immediately shook his head. "Not really …. Its just that Michaela an’ Katie have talked so much about ya …. an’ I seen the weddin’ photograph …. There was no mistakin’ who you were …."

Momentarily Grace’s shoulders slumped a little, and then suddenly straightened resolutely again. "Well Byron Sully," she exclaimed. "You might not remember me …. though I always thought I was worth rememberin’ …" She paused and giggled at her own joke, then continued, "You might not remember me … but I remember you … an’ so I’m gonna give ya a hug before we go inside an’ you can tell us what you’ve bin doin’ for the past four years huh?" Her smile broad, she wrapped her arms around Sully’s shoulders and hugged him hard. When she pulled back, tears shimmered in her eyes. "I still can’t believe its you …," she murmured.

Joseph returned the woman’s irresistible, beaming smile and then reached for Michaela’s hand. "Sounds good to me," he said cheerily, beckoning them inside.

As they reached the top steps the sound of horses approaching could be heard. They waited and then watched as Cloud Dancing and Dorothy rode into the yard. After hearty greetings, they all went inside to spend an enjoyable afternoon, talking and catching up.

***********************

Dorothy glanced across to Cloud Dancing who was sitting by the fire lost in thought. "You’re quiet tonight," she said with concern, placing her writing tablet and pencil down on the blanket. "Somethin’ worrying you?" The medicine man gave her a wan smile but did not reply. "Its Sully aint it?" suggested Dorothy, rising and moving across to sit with him on the floor of the tipi.

Cloud Dancing shrugged his shoulders. "He seems happy …. but there is confusion in his eyes …. even sadness …. He is unsure who he is …," he replied cautiously.

"That’s understandable aint it … under the circumstances …," offered Dorothy. "Its real hard for all of ‘em …. Michaela too …."

Cloud Dancing smiled and took her hand in his. "You are right …." He raised her hand to rest it against his cheek, but his thoughts returned to his friends. "You heard Michaela mention that Sully had a bad headache this morning?"

"Uh huh …. Seems that accident all those years ago still effects him some …."

"I believe it is not only the accident …"

"What do you mean …"

"You remember …. when I was teaching you about my people and the medicine? …" Dorothy nodded and so he continued, "You must treat the whole person …. not just the site of the pain …. I believe there is more to Sully’s headaches than an accident which occurred many years ago …"

"That’s why ya said he was confused …"

The medicine man nodded. "My brother is lost … out of balance …. He knows he belongs with Michaela …. but is unsure of his path … The Cheyenne believe that a man has no future … if he has no past …"

Noting the melancholy tone in her husband’s voice, Dorothy attempted to reassure him. "Michaela’s trying ta fill in the past for him …. I know it aint the same …. but there’s still a chance he’ll regain his memory …"

At that, Cloud Dancing smiled and pulled her close. "Of that I am certain," he asserted. "But while he is making this journey …." He trailed off, his eyes locking with his wife’s.

Suddenly Dorothy understood. "You’re wishin’ we didn’ have ta leave day after tomorrow aren’t you?" she said quietly. "But the bookin’ in San Francisco was made months ago …"

He smiled fondly at her. "I know," he said quietly. "But I cannot help wishing that I could stay …. help him …."

Dorothy took a deep breath. "If its that important to ya …. I could go without you …. Its only a couple of weeks … you know I want to be home for Christmas …"

Cloud Dancing shook his head. "No … we have always travelled together …. and we will this time also …. But perhaps we could just stay the few days we are needed and then return?" he suggested hopefully.

Dorothy leant across to kiss him lightly. "I’ll wire an’ say that we’re only gonna be available for a coupla days …. How does that sound? I know how much Sully means to you …. an’ I owe him a lot too …." Cloud Dancing regarded her quizzically, so she added, "He’s saved you so many times from animals such as Custer …. If he hadn’ done that …." She trailed off.

Cloud Dancing reached out to cup his wife’s cheek in his hand. "Then we would not be together," he completed her sentence. "Just as you complete me …. it is time for Michaela to convince Sully that it is the same for her …. He is the one who now needs *her* strength …. *her* reassurance …."

Dorothy chuckled. "Like *he* once had to reassure her huh?"

"It is the same …"

"Michaela aint the same person she was when she came here," said Dorothy confidently. "She’s learnt a lot from him …. She’ll find a way … I know it …" She wrapped her arm around her husband’s waist and leant against his shoulder, the warmth of the fire and the feel of his arms around her making her languid and more than a little needful of her husband’s gentle touch. As if aware of what she was thinking, his arms tightened around her and he kissed her lovingly.

**************************

Michaela entered her bedroom, quietly closed the door and then leant against it, her lip caught between her teeth. She glanced across to the large empty bed and tears suddenly shimmered in her eyes. When Sully had accompanied her up the stairs this evening her heart had leapt in anticipation, only to be immediately slowed when he kissed her goodnight and once again entered the guestroom.

She shook herself and walked across the room to her dresser from which she withdrew a warm winter nightgown and placed it on the bed. She undid the heavy coiled braid she’d worn all day and began to rhythmically run the brush through her hair until it shone. It was so quiet. She’d never have believed she could feel so lonely with Sully in the house, but that was exactly how she felt at this moment.

She placed the hairbrush on the dresser and viewed her image in the mirror. A pair of sad eyes looked back at her. She swallowed the lump in her throat and resolutely rose to change for bed. She quickly unbuttoned her blouse, stepped out of her skirt and picked up the nightgown, fingering the heavy warm cotton. Her eyes drifted to the door, as if wishing it would suddenly open. She picked up the gown and began to slip it over her head, only to suddenly freeze and then slowly lift it off again. She took a deep breath, walked across to the dresser, pulled open one of the lower drawers, and withdrew a light, sleeveless, lace-trimmed night-shift. She unfolded it, fluffed out the creases and laid it on the bed. She picked up the cut glass perfume bottle and lightly sprayed her neck and shoulders, before pulling on the light shift. Again she took a deep breath and then turned to view herself in the full-length mirror. Was she being ridiculous? She shook her head, dispelling her doubts, straightened the gown, selected a light, cream woollen shawl from the cupboard, placing it about her shoulders, and pulled the door open again, to walk lightly and silently down the landing.

Joseph heard the handle turn and then air wafted across the room lightly caressing his skin as the door opened and was quietly closed again. His heart began to pound. He lifted his head from the pillow and opened his eyes to see a slim figure standing at the foot of the bed, silhouetted by the moonlight streaming through the bedroom window. "Michaela?" he asked softly.

She took a couple of steps forward and the light shawl fell from her shoulders to catch in the crook of her elbows. She remained silent.

"Michaela?" he murmured again, pulling himself up further in the large bed.

She stepped around the end of the bed and towards him, just a little closer. "I …. I ….." She took a deep breath and began again, her voice breaking, "You once told me …. if …. if I ever needed any holding …. to just ask …." She paused, and when she spoke again her voice emerged breathily, "I’m asking now … please …."

Chapter 18

There was a long silence during which the electricity in the room heightened so that it could almost be seen sparking off the walls. At last Joseph inhaled deeply, sidled across to the middle of the bed and threw back the covers on the side he’d just vacated. Michaela let the shawl drop to the floor and climbed into the bed beside him, immediately laying against him as close as possible. Joseph sighed and, giving way to his desires, wrapped his arms around her and drew her even closer, burying his face in her silky hair. "You’re playin’ with fire ya know Michaela," he murmured, his voice muffled.

Her hand crept between the buttons of his nightshirt and she began to lightly caress his chest. "That’s alright," she replied softly, and then, with an impish smile, teased, "A dear old friend once said that seeing us together was like watching a fire burn ….." She lifted her head and kissed his chin. "I love you so much," she murmured with yearning. "I …. I …. couldn’t wait any longer …. I tried …."

Joseph chuckled wryly and kissed the top of her head. "That’s alright …. hoped one of us’d make the first move some time soon …." He tenderly ran his fingers through the wisps of hair which softly framed her face, then placed his hand under her chin, tilting her head so that he could claim her lips with his.

Michaela gasped at the instant stirring at his touch. She instinctively eased herself up a little so that she could more actively participate in the kiss which deepened quickly, urgently. She placed her hand at the nape of his neck and opened her mouth to his, revelling in his eagerness, his enthusiasm, and returning it in kind. The kiss went on and, as their bodies stirred, their hands moved freely and lovingly over each other. As Michaela lifted her leg to hook it over his, he groaned, realising she would be cognisant of his potent arousal. Her response was to deepen the kiss impossibly further, and then he became aware of her hand at the hem of his nightshirt, slowly drawing it up so that she could caress his bare skin. His heart was pounding so hard he thought it might explode out of his chest, but his hand followed her lead and he bunched her nightgown up, running his hands lovingly over her. The feel of her soft, naked skin against his own was overwhelming. She was writhing against him and moaning softly back in her throat, urging him to intensify the stroking of her aroused body, to take their loving further. He rolled so that he was laying over her and broke off the kiss. He peered down into her shining, desire-filled eyes. "Michaela?" he whispered, his voice husky. Her chest rising and falling rapidly with her heavy breathing, she swallowed deeply, then nodded and murmured again, "I love you … so much …."

Giving into the inevitable with a growl, he joined them as one, rhythmically moving over her as she enfolded him with her arms and legs and crooned loving words softly against his ear. Oblivious to their heated, damp skin and audible sighs and murmurs, their dance of love continued with an urgency which made it difficult to breath, until at last they acceded to their release with barely stifled cries of fulfilment.

Eventually they reposed in each others arms, awaiting the ebbing of their rapid breathing and pounding hearts. Joseph nuzzled her neck and placed tiny, loving kisses to her damp skin. He rolled sideways bringing her with him so that her head came to rest on his chest, his hands still unconsciously stroking her skin. She too couldn’t keep her hands still under the damp cotton of his nightshirt. She looked up at him shyly. "Alright?" she whispered. His broad smile was his only answer. "You don’t mind that I came in?" she asked nervously.

He shook his head and kissed her forehead. "I love you too Michaela …. I just wasn’t sure how ta show ya … when ta show ya …. I’m glad ya came in ….." He suddenly sat up a little and leaned over her to light the lamp on the night-stand. When he caught her quizzical look he said softly, almost shyly, "I wanna see ya better." When the lamp was alight, he propped himself up on his elbow beside her and began to ease her nightgown up even further. Realising his intent, she eased herself up and helped him remove the gown and chuckled as he disposed of it over the side of the bed. Boldly she too raised his nightshirt until he hurriedly sent it in the same direction as her gown.

Her skin rose in goosebumps as Sully ran his hand lovingly over her skin, leaving no part untouched, and lingering over the soft fullness of her breasts. "You’re so beautiful," he murmured. "More beautiful that I imagined …"

"Imagined?"

He reddened. "Ever since that Sunday we kissed by the creek," he admitted with an embarrassed smile.

Michaela chuckled and then more soberly, shyly, said, "You can’t imagine how I’ve dreamt of being with you like this again." She blushed and admitted bashfully, "I …. I …. didn’t realise how important it was to me …. until you were gone …." She reached up to draw his head down for another loving kiss and then settled back again, her hand laying lightly over his as he continued his loving caresses.

When he reached her shoulder he paused, running a fingertip over a fine white scar. "What’s this?" he asked, his light caress and concern making her tingle.

"I … I … was shot," she said softly.

His eyes opened wide and he gulped. "How long ago?" he asked.

"Oh … about seven years …."

"So I was with ya?"

"You were out surveying …"

"Who did it?" he demanded, his finger still stroking the scar.

She took a deep breath. "A man with a vendetta against doctors …. I’d never seen him before ….. he turned up at the clinic door and shot me point blank …" Tears glimmered in her eyes. "It took me a long time to get over it …. to regain my confidence …. You helped me ….."

Joseph ran his thumb across her cheek. "Oh Michaela ….," he murmured, before again lowering his lips to hers for a deep, loving kiss. At last he pulled back. "Now its my turn," he said softly. He indicated the scar on *his* shoulder. "How did this happen?" he asked.

Michaela reached up to trace the scar with her fingertip. "It happened a couple of days before Katie was born …. You had a …. a… fi ….. argument with a soldier about his treatment of the indians …. especially Cloud Dancing ….," she replied sombrely. "Cloud Dancing knew you were wounded and came to fetch me …. We journeyed out into the woods and found you …. I stitched this up ….." She trailed off and then suddenly smiled broadly. "Afterwards I went into labour and you had to deliver Katie …"

"I did!" Joseph exclaimed. "Out in the woods?"

"Uh huh ….. you were wonderful …"

Joseph shook his head in amazement. "Can’t imagine what that was like," he mused and then he grinned. "Well …. actually I can …. an’ I aint sure how I’da got through it …"

"We did it together Sully …. we always have," Michaela reassured him.

He cupped her face with his hand. "So much ta find out … ta understand ….," he said softly. Then he added, "What about the deep scar on my leg …. How did that happen?"

Michaela’s breath caught. "I …. I …." She took a deep breath. "It was the same soldier …. only this time ….."

"This time?" he prompted when she paused.

Her lip trembled. "Only this time I thought I’d lost you," she whispered soulfully. "You were missing for days …. and when we eventually found you …. you were dying …."

He wiped away a tear with his thumb. "But ya saved me," he whispered in return. "We did it together, right? Like we always have …."

She nodded and turned her head to kiss the palm of his hand. "Uh huh …. together Sully …," she reiterated. She looked up into his loving blue eyes and whispered, "Love me again …. please …."

Joseph needed no further bidding. His desire was as strong as her own. He lowered his lips to hers for a prolonged, leisurely, deep kiss which restated their love for each other, their past and their future. Gone was the urgency of the first time. This time would be long and deep and sensual, as past sensations were reawakened and they savoured their loving reunion.

*************************

Katie woke to the new day, clambered out of bed and headed down to the privy. The house was really quiet which meant it was still early, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep now. As she returned to her room she glanced at the closed door of her pa’s room. It was exciting having him home, and having to keep it a secret. Of course the fact that her ma had told her she could stay home one more day before going back to school made it all the better.

She quickly dressed and brushed her hair as best she could, and then, after selecting a new red ribbon, headed over to her ma’s room, brush and ribbon in hand. She pushed the door open and was startled to discover the room empty. Not only that, the bed was made and everything was neat and tidy. Her brow creased in puzzlement. Perhaps it wasn’t so early after all, though the house was still very, very quiet. She walked back onto the landing and stood for a moment contemplating her options. She tiptoed up to Brian’s door, quietly turned the handle and peeked in. He was laying sound asleep, curled up with his back to the door. She stepped back and quietly closed the door again. She glanced across at her father’s door once more, then crept across, turned the handle and, as she’d done with Brian, peeked inside. The sight which met her eyes astounded her. She opened the door wider and took a step into the room, her hands on her hips. There was her ma, curled up in her pa’s arms, both sound asleep. The little girl turned puzzled eyes on the closed door of her ma’s room. Something here was not making any sense at all.

She stepped back out of the room and then ran the few steps to Brian’s door. This time she made no pretence of keeping quiet. She pushed the door open, strode across to the bed and gently, but insistently, tapped her brother on the back until he stirred. "Brian!" she hissed. "Brian … wake up!" she demanded.

Brian groaned as he turned over and peered at his little sister through sleepy eyes. "Katie!" he exclaimed. "Its still early!"

She tugged at his bedclothes until he was uncovered to the waist. "Come with me," she ordered. "I got somethin’ ta show ya …"

"Can’t it wait until everyone’s up?" moaned Brian, rubbing at his eyes.

"No!" she muttered indignantly. She grabbed his hand and pulled. "Come on!"

Brian gave an exaggerated sigh and rolled to the side of the bed. "This better be important Katie," he murmured wryly.

Again she pulled at his hand and he staggered to his feet and followed sleepily behind her. As she was about to open the door to Sully’s room, he pulled back. "Hey … that’s pa’s room," he said in a whisper. "Ya don’ wanna disturb him …"

"He’s asleep," returned Katie with a child’s logic, pushing the door open and pulling her brother inside. Again she stood in the middle of the room, hands on hips, contemplating her parents laying in each others’ arms still sound asleep. "See!!" she exclaimed, in a theatrical whisper.

Brian could barely conceal his smile on two counts. Firstly, seeing his ma and pa back together this way made everything seem right with the world, and secondly, Katie’s stunned puzzlement was priceless. He swallowed his grin and grasped his little sister’s hand. "Come on," he whispered. "Don’ wake ‘em up yet."

As they reached the doorway, Katie turned back to peer at her parents once again. "Why are they sleepin’ in here like that Brian?" she asked, her voice rising with her bafflement.

"That’s what husbands and wives do when they love each other Kates," replied Brian patiently. "They sleep in the same bed ….. you’ve been to Andrew an’ Colleens’ … you knew that …"

That gave the little girl pause for thought. Her brow creased in a frown. "But ma an’ pa didn’ do that in Paynesville! Or last night!" she argued. She glanced across to her ma’s room and then pointed, "An’ that’s ma’s room …. Why’re they sleepin’ in the guestroom?"

Brian shrugged his shoulders. "I dunno …. maybe they were still gittin’ used ta bein’ home … and together …. but now you better git used to it cos I reckon that’s the way they’ll be sleepin’ from now on …"

"In the guestroom?!"

Again Brian shrugged. "We’ll haveta wait an’ see huh?"

The little girl still looked a little dubious, her brow furrowed. Suddenly she asked, "Brian …. why do mama an’ papa like sleepin’ together like that? Don’ they git hot?"

Brian grinned and then reddened when he realised just how far this conversation could go. "I reckon ya better ask ma about that some day Kates …. but not today … How ‘bout you go down an’ start settin’ the table for breakfast … I’ll come down and fix ya some eggs after I git dressed … How’s that sound?"

"What about ma an’ pa?"

"We’ll let ‘em sleep for a while …." When she looked about to protest he added cajolingly, "I might even take ya fishin’ for a coupla hours before I go in ta work .."

Katie’s eyes lit up. She nodded and headed downstairs at speed, the previous discussion forgotten in light of new developments.

Brian watched her disappear down the stairs and then turned back to the still ajar door of the guestroom. He couldn’t resist another peek. He lovingly observed his parents for a moment. His ma looked real content laying there, her hair fanned out over Sully’s chest, his arms wrapped securely around her. He glanced down at the floor and chuckled silently. Lucky Katie hadn’t noticed the discarded nightclothes! That would’ve opened a whole new can of worms! He said a quick prayer of thanks, silently pulled the door closed and headed back to his room to dress.

Joseph opened one eye as the door clicked shut and his face broke into a broad grin. Poor Brian! Still, the young man had handled the situation remarkably well for one so young. He chuckled silently to himself. Poor Kates. Perhaps it did seem strange to her to see her ma laying in the arms of her pa. She’d spent half her lifetime knowing her mother slept alone in the large bed in the room opposite hers. Speaking of her ma …

The feel of Michaela laying along his length, warm and soft, was exhilarating. He ran his hand down her arm and lovingly kissed her forehead. She was such an odd mixture – shy one minute, bold the next. He was glad she’d decided to be bold last night. With the tormented way he’d been feeling, he may never have had the courage to do what she’d done. He slid further down the bed so that her head lodged under his chin and her softness settled more securely against his chest. Soon they’d have to rise and face a new, and bound to be confusing day, but right now, this was perfect and all he wanted.

**********************

Michaela woke and was immediately aware of being enfolded in Sully’s arms. She snuggled in against him and put her lips lightly to his chest. She glanced upwards. His eyes were closed and his breathing deep and even in sleep. How she wished the world would stand still and she could remain in his arms here forever. As light as a butterfly, she ran her fingertip over his lips, and then through the light stubble on his chin. So many wonderful memories …. She swallowed. Would Sully ever have those memories again, the memories they shared? She sincerely hoped so, but she also knew that they were already building new ones, not to replace the old, but to add to them. She smiled and kissed his chest once again.

Suddenly outside the door she heard hurried footsteps and, expecting Katie to some bursting in at any minute, she quickly pulled the blanket up a little. Instead, her daughter hurried into her own room, the cupboard door banged shut and then she went running downstairs again. Within minutes the front door closed and then came the sound of galloping horses heading for the woods.

"Sounds like Brian an’ Katie’ve decided ta leave us in peace for a bit," remarked Joseph quietly, startling Michaela who had thought him still asleep. He chuckled and she looked up at him quizzically, prompting him to explain, "Ah … you slept through the best part …. a while back ….. Katie discovered us here like this .."

Michaela blushed. "She did?"

"Uh huh …. She dragged Brian in here … an’ he hadta try to explain to her about her parents sleepin’ together in the same bed …."

Michaela’s colour rose still further but she giggled. "Poor Brian …."

"He’s a good kid Michaela," added Joseph. "Ya done a fine job raisin’ him …"

"You had quite a bit to do with that yourself," advised Michaela softly, tightening her hold around his waist, her thumb teasing his skin.

He kissed the top of her head in response. "So …. now we’ve got the house to ourselves for a bit ….?"

Michaela peered up at him shyly.

"How do we feel about lovin’ in the mornin’ hmm?"

She slowly and sensuously ran her hand up over his chest to the nape of his neck and then drew herself up a little to claim his mouth with hers.

After long moments he broke off the kiss to whisper, "Good answer" and slid down to enjoy their loving union once more.

************************

Joseph absent-mindedly rubbed the mixture of soap and oil into the saw blade which had rusted from years of lying idle. Yesterday his fingers had been itching to begin working with wood again, building and carving, and he’d decided to ascertain what tools he had and what he would need if he was to resume his carpentry work. Today, however, his thoughts lay elsewhere.

His eyes automatically drifted up towards the house and he wondered what Michaela was doing. His breathing quickened a little. This morning it had taken all of his willpower to roll out of bed before Brian and Katie returned, and he had a feeling Michaela felt the same. He had this incredible need to be near her, touch her. He felt like a young schoolboy experiencing first love, only he knew it was much deeper than that. If he closed his eyes he could still feel her, smell her on his skin.

Since lunch he’d been trying to carry on as normal, but was finding it more than difficult. If anyone had ever told him he could feel this way about a woman and relish it, he’d have told them they were crazy. It didn’t help that Colleen had unexpectedly arrived and offered to take Katie out for the afternoon. He smiled to himself. He had a feeling Brian might have had something to do with her decision. So now he and Michaela were alone again and he’d been fighting this yearning to go join her in the house for quite a while. He still felt a little uncertain. She was so different to he, so refined, educated. Although she had come to him last night, he was still unsure about her needs. Would she be feeling the same longings he was fighting?

He suddenly jumped as he nicked the side of his finger on the blade. He put his finger to his mouth and yet again his eyes roved upwards to the quiet house. He then eyed the half-cleaned blade. His heart wasn’t in it. In fact his heart was up there with Michaela. He set the blade aside, shook out the rag, stoppered the bottle of oil and headed, not quite as nonchalantly as he would have liked, through the yard and up to the front steps.

Despite their four years together as man and wife, to Michaela, last night had represented a new beginning, a new, exciting beginning, and her skin still tingled from his touch, his loving. Constantly fighting the need to be with him, she’d resolved to return to old, familiar routines and on Wednesdays she always washed her hair. She placed the two pitchers of warm water to her right on the sink, undid the top buttons of her blouse and placed a towel round her neck, tucking her collar under it. She bent forward over the sink, grasped the metal handle of the first pitcher and began to carefully pour the warm water through her long tresses. She was startled when a large hand removed the pitcher from her and a soft, loving voice said, "Here … let me …." She dropped her hands to the bench-top and willingly let him take over.

Sully stepped closer and she closed her eyes, savouring the sensation – his scent, the touch of his hand on her neck and scalp, the feel of his body pressing up against hers. All the pleasurable sensations of last night were reawakened in just a few moments. She told herself she was being ridiculous – he was merely helping her wash her hair – and yet she couldn’t control the pounding of her heart, or the blush which was slowly suffusing her skin. As he lathered her hair he seemed to press even closer and his touch assumed a sensuousness which made her stomach flutter and her fingers clench on the sides of the bench.

At last he finished and drew her up, wrapping a towel around her wet hair and leading her over to sit before the fireplace. Without saying a word he gently rubbed the excess water from her hair, then moved behind her and proceeded to run the brush through it until it hung tangle-free before the flames of the fire. If she hadn’t been so aroused, she might well have fallen asleep under his gentle ministrations, the steady pull of the brush, his fingers running through her hair as it dried. Instead, she longed for him to take her into his arms again. If she hadn’t recalled Dorothy’s words of many years ago, she’d have felt embarrassed at her feelings, but now she knew that it was alright to enjoy, even yearn for her husband’s loving attention, and after so long, it felt good to be cherished, nurtured in this way.

At last he finished and placed the brush down on the side-table. He moved around to face her. "Alright?" he asked softly, his eyes locking with hers, his fingers gently brushing away a wisp of hair which had fallen forward over her eye. She nodded and held his gaze, her heart pounding. Suddenly aware that her desire was as great as his own, he slowly leant forward to cover her mouth with his. She gasped and responded enthusiastically. He pulled back a little to look deep into her desire filled eyes. "You don’ mind?" he whispered. She shook her head, her hair moving in shimmering coppery waves down over her shoulders. His eyes raked her face. "God … I love you Michaela," he murmured, as he again leant in to kiss her. His hands went to the buttons on her blouse and he slowly began to unfasten them. She closed her eyes and gave in to the pleasure of his touch. Suddenly his hands left her and she opened her eyes to see him gazing towards the door. "Sully?" she asked softly.

"Ah …. maybe we better lock the door huh?" he suggested softly.

She smiled. "I suppose," she responded breathily.

His eyes came back to hers and he smiled. "Don’ want Matthew comin’ in … interruptin’."

Michaela’s brow suddenly creased and she asked urgently. "Why did you say that?"

Now it was Joseph’s turn to look perplexed. He shrugged his shoulders. "Dunno … just imagined it could be embarrassin’ if he walked in on us … when we were … you know …."

Michaela blushed at the thought, but persisted, "Why Matthew?"

Again Joseph shrugged his shoulders. "Why’re ya askin’ that Michaela?" he inquired, the look on her face telling him there was more to her question than met the eye.

"I …. I …. just wondered why you said Matthew …. After all he doesn’t even live here now …."

"I told ya I dunno …. Why are ya makin’ so much of it?"

Realising his increasing agitation, Michaela suddenly smiled. She leant forward and kissed him and then said softly, "Because it actually happened …. years ago …. not long after we were married …."

"You mean …."

"Uh huh ….. I’d say that subconsciously you knew that …. that’s why you said it …," she concluded triumphantly.

"You’re guessin’," cautioned Joseph, not daring to hope.

"Perhaps," agreed Michaela with a smile. "But I think I’m right …. and if its happened once it will probably happen again." She knelt up and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. "I wouldn’t be surprised if those memories begin to return, almost without you realising it," she murmured against his ear.

In response he embraced her tightly against himself. "Hope you’re right," he replied, turning his head to again cover her mouth with his. After a few moments he pulled back and said hungrily, "Think we were startin’ somethin’ before …." He cocked his eyebrow and smiled cheekily at her.

"Mmmm …. think you’re right," she replied. She clambered up, secured the doors and then joined him again on the floor in front of the fire. "Now where were we?" she asked saucily.

They resumed the sensual preludes to their loving, totally involved with each other and oblivious to their surroundings, so it was a shock when there was a sudden loud knocking on the front door. They pulled apart, skin flushed, clothes in disarray. "Who could that be?" hissed Michaela, hurriedly buttoning her blouse.

"Don’ know …. but I wish they’d go away," retorted Joseph, taking several deep breaths.

The heavy knocking was repeated, prompting Joseph to call out, "We’re comin’ …"

At last Michaela stood, straightened her skirt and swept the heavy fall of her hair back behind her shoulders. She took a deep breath and walked across to unlock the door. She thrust it open to discover a smiling Hank on the threshold. "Afternoon folks," he said jovially. "Thought you two musta bin home …. seein’ the way the kids an’ Grace an’ Robert E were actin’ …. Thought I’d come out an’ see how you’re doin’."

Michaela smiled at the barkeep and stood back to allow him to enter. "We’re fine Hank," she said cheerily. "Aren’t we Sully?" she asked, regarding her husband intently.

Joseph plastered what he hoped was a welcoming smile on his face and replied, "Yeah … we’re just fine …. Come on in …."