Meeting Tips

This section includes tips and suggestions that can help ease the process of participating on the Team that will decide if your child is eligible for Special Education and if so, writing your child's Individualized Educational Program.

Preparing for the Meeting

If this is your first Special Education meeting consider these suggestions:

• Learn all you can about your child's school. Tour the building, learn the school system, get to know what resources are available, how the school system is involved with the community, what extracurricular activies are offered, transportation available, and meet the school personnel.
  
• Compile all records on your child. You can use a file folder and notebook or a three-ring binder with folders and index tabs. Include all health records, Early Intervention records, day care records, nursery or preschool records, notes on developmental milestones, evaluations, letters from and to any professionals including teachers, test scores, report cards, etc. Be sure to take this folder or binder with you to the meeting.
  
• Record the date you received the Notice of Referral and keep the notice in your child's file. You may want to ask for a copy of the referral for your file also.
  
• Follow timelines to be sure the process moves along as it is suppose to.
  
• Request a sample IEP form and become familiar with the information that it contains. This will help you prepare your input and questions as well as give you an idea of what will be discussed during the meeting.

General Preparation

• Remember that no news is good news. Just like fires, violence, crimes, floods, etc. making the news, you only hear about these Special Education meetings when there is a problem. In actuality, most of the time the meeting goes very well and all members of the Team truly do want what is best for your child. Certainly be prepared and know the laws and your rights, but don't go into the meeting with your guns loaded and aimed.
  
• Send a copy of any letters, evaluations, doctors reports, etc. to the appropriate school personnel. If the school has a file on your child, only send the most recent documents that they may not have received. Likewise, be sure you have a copy of any recent evaluations before the meeting so you will have time to review it and not be seeing or hearing the results for the first time while at the meeting. Review the folder or binder you have been keeping on your child and be sure it is up-to-date. Remember to take this folder with you to the meeting.
  
• Before any review meetings, call for a teacher's conference to be sure you are up-to-date on your child's strengths, weaknesses and current levels of accomplishments. Ask the teacher what his or her areas of concern are for your child. Try to get an idea of where the teacher stands so you will eliminate the potential for a surprise. If your schedule does not allow for a face to face meeting with the teacher, you can do this by telephone. If your child is receiving related services such as physical or speech therapy, have the same discussion with each of these service providers. you might be able to coordinate all of these meetings into one group meeting.
  
• Think about what goals you think should be set for your child. Observe your child and your family at home and in the community. What is your child trying to do, or near accomplishing? These could be things to set as goals in the IEP. What obstacles does your family deal with due to your child's disability? What is frustrating or embaarrasing for your child or your family? (Toilet-training, self-help, communicating, behavior, etc.) What does your child wish he could do?
  
• If your child has multiple disabilities or delays in several areas, try to identify what your child's priorities are (i.e. speech, social, cognitive, etc.). Ask yourself what one or two things you would like your child to be able to do as an adult. (Walk, talk, communicate, live as independently as possible, be gainfully employed, etc.) This can help you determine your family's priorities and values and help you clarify what you feel is most important for your special needs child. Some families feel that cognitive development is more important than playing well with other children on the playground while another family may determine that any form of communication is more important than independent mobility. Is it more important to you that your child eat well at lunch or is it more important the he learn the necessary self-help skills regardless of how much, or how little, he actually gets into his mouth? The needs of your child and the priorities of your child and family need to be appropriately conveyed to the rest of the IEP Team as a multitude of different factors come into play for each child.
  
• You may want to call your Chairperson and ask to meet the members of the Team. Or you may simply want to meet the Parent Represntative, either in person or by telephone.
  
• Become familiar with the Individuals with the Individuals with Disabilites Education Act and keep current on any changes. Know your child's legal rights and your rights in the evaluation, eligibility and placement process.
  
• If appropriate, talk with your child about the upcoming meeting and get direct information from your child about anything relevant to the decisions that will be made. If you plan on having your child attent the meeting, prepare him for the meeting.
  
• Become familiar with the different diploma options available from your school system.
  
• IDEA states that you may invite any other individual that knows your child to attend the meeting with you. If you feel you would be more comfortable with a support person with you, think about who that person should be. The two of you can prepare together for this meeting. You may want to ask your support person to take notes for you during the meeting since so much happens during this meeting. You will then be able to review what went on after the meeting. Be sure your support person knows where you stand on all issues that are likely to be covered during the meeting so they will be able to help you express your thoughts and feelings.
  
• Some community-based organizations may provide a parent advocate to assist you. If you have been experiencing difficulty in previous IEP meetings, some nonprofit legal agencies provide legal advocates which are funded by grants and, therefore, at no cost to parents.
  
• You may find it helpful to review a sample IEP form, or your child's previous IEP, and record your thoughts, questions, and preferences. Use these notes during the meeting.
  
• Your general ongoing record keeping could include your child's completed projects and assignments which display his strengths. You will also find it helpful to keep an educational history including names of schools, dates attended, names of teachers, dates of conferences and notes about the conferences.
  
• Be sure to continue to record dates of evaluations, when you signed consent forms, etc.

At the Meeting

• Give the Team insights about yuor child. What he is like at home, after school, and on vacations. State your concerns and ideas for your child's educational program. Use your records or materials, if necessary.
  
• Pay close attention to the goals set for your child. Be sure they are not things he can already do, or is near mastering. At the same time, if you feel it is unrealistic to expect your child to achieve the goals in the specified time period, bring your concerns up the the other IEP Team members. Often the goals will be broken down into steps and the goal revised to only include one or two steps necessary to achieve the original goal.
  
• If you find yourself emotionally breaking down during the IEP meeting, as many parents do, try to regain control by reminding yourself that this is an extremely emotional event for you. Although the other members of the IEP TEam are not usually parents of a child with a disability, they have participated in many IEP meetings and realize that it is an emotionally charged event for parents. Try not to let your emotions reveal themselves in destructive ways, such as displaced anger, rather ask for a brief recess in the meeting and leave the meeting room for a few minutes.
  
• Take your time. If things are happening too fast for you, ask the chairperson to slow the process down. Question any of the members about what they have said.
  
• Listen to the responses of the Team members. If the members disagree with you, give yourself time to hear and digest their points of view even if it means coming back for another meeting.
  
• Record the date of the meeting and who was present in your child's file.
  
• As your child reaches high school age, the Team should begin to consider plans for Occupational Education or other options for after he graduates from high school. Discuss diploma options and the need for an adult service provider for services your child may need in adulthood.

Follow-Up

• Closely monitor your child's progress (or lack of) and discuss any concerns with an appropriate member of the IEP Team.
  
• Keep the lines of communication open at all times.
  
• As soon after the meeting as possible, write down your impressions of what happened during the meeting. These notes will help you if you ever have to contest the recommendations made for your child.
  
• Remember that you may return to the IEP Team at any time to revise your child's IEP.

[Back to Special Education Table of Contents]

[Home][Site Map][Preemie Mom][CP Mom][Early Intervention][Special Ed][Siblings][Miscellaneous][Links]