HOW TO IDENTIFY WHERE A DRIVER IS FROM
One hand on wheel, one hand on horn
NEW YORK

One hand on wheel, one finger out window
CHICAGO

One hand on wheel, one hand on newspaper, foot solidly on accelerator
BOSTON

One hand on wheel, one hand cradling cell phone, brick on accelerator
CALIFORNIA
(with gun in lap)  L.A.

Both hands on wheel, eyes shut, both feet on brake, quivering in terror
OHIO, BUT DRIVING IN CALIFORNIA

Both hands in air, gesturing, both feet on accelerator, head turned to talk to someone in back seat
ITALY

One hand on latte, one knee on wheele, one hand cradling cell phone, foot on brake, mind on game
SEATTLE

One hand on wheel, one hand on hunting rifle, alternating between both feet being on the accelerator and both on the brake, throwing a McDonalds bag out the window
TEXAS-CITY MALE

One hand on wheel, one hand hanging out the window, keeping speed steadily at 70 mph, driving down the center of the road unless coming around a blind curve, in which case they are on the left side of road.
TEXAS-COUNTRY MALE

One hand constantly refocusing the rear-view mirror to show different angles of the big hair, one hand going between mousse,brush, and rat-tail to keep the helmet hair going, both feet on the accelerator, poodle steering the car, chrome .38 revolver with mother of pearl inlaid handle in the glove compartment
TEXAS-FEMALE

Both hands on steering wheel in a relaxed posture, eyes constantly checking the rear-view mirror to watch for visible emissions from their own or another's car
COLORADO

One hand on steering whee., yelling obscenities, the other hand waving gun out the window and firing repeatedly, keeping a careful eye out for landmarks along the way so as to be able to come back and pick up any bullets that didn't hit other motorists so as not to litter
COLORADO RESIDENTS ON SPOTTING A CAR WITH TEXAS PLATE

Four wheel drive pickup truck, shotgun mounted in rear window, beer cans on floor, squirrel tails attached to antanna
WEST VIRGINIA-MALE

Junker, driven by someone who previously had a nice car and who is not wearing a barrel
LAS VEGAS

Two hands gripping wheel, blue hair barely visible above window level, driving 35 on the interstate in the left lane with the left blinker on
FLORIDA
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