Through a hooded spokesman at a hasty news conference this evening, the Moline Greens announced a major trade with the expansion London Rippers. Moline has sent star outfielder Manny Ramirez, infielder Brent Abernathy, and its seventh-round pick in the 2001 draft to London for the Rippers' second- and fifth-round picks in 2002, its first-round picks in 2003 and 2004, $35 in draft money distributed over the 2002-2004 drafts, and the swift and safe return of nubile infielder Wilson Betemit, lost in the first round of the November expansion draft.
The spokesman called the loss of Ramirez, offensive backbone of three straight league titles, "a concession to rising salary structures." Given the recent economic downturn and the impending free agency of Ramirez, John Deere, Inc. and the Greens "considered it prudent to divest in some of its higher priced players." The spokesman also took the occasion to announce a new $50 rebate on Deere snow blowers, good through the end of the month.
Ramirez was reportedly out galavanting in Homestead, Florida, the team's spring-training home, and was unavailable for comment. Betemit is still in the Dominican, awaiting an entry visa. Reached at home, Greens' general manager Rolf Samuels said, "Hello? Hello? Who is this?" Josh Logan, director of scouting and player development, called the trade "promising, an ambitious attempt to embrace the rebuilding process." Logan called Betemit "a fine, fine young player. Quite young, quite, yes, precocious. It's good to have him back."