=purav12

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                 THE BROIGES BEGGAR'S GAZETTE 
                   Publiee en Broiges, Belge
         "I had one Grunch, but the Eggplant over there."
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OUR PRICE:       -- NIE (New Israeli Euro) 1.5 --     -- CHEAP--
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                         VOLUME 2:  #11                           
                     Lesser Waning Av Edition
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     !CONGRATULATIONS! to Wm. Richman, Esq., for winning
                   The Battle of Billy's Trees.

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Who takes the name of the LORD in vain:  One who make a show of
his piety.

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TODAY'S GOTCHA FROM THE ORTHODOX ONION
"We make more fences than an onion makes skins."

Get a dozen Gotcha's and win one Brownie Point!
!!!Collect a million Brownie Points and be Chief Rabbi!!!

You can't wear a sombrero on Shabas.
Because it keeps the sun off your head, like an umbrulla can.
So wearing a sombrero is like carrying an umbrulla.
And you can't carry an umbrulla on Shabos.
Because you can't open an umbrulla on Shabos. 
And if you carry an umbrulla on Shabos someone might think you are
going to open it on Shabos.

Because opening an umbrulla is like pitching a tent.
And everyone knows you can't pitch a tent on Shabos.

Billy said:  Surely this applies only to an inflateable sombrero.

I say:  Everyone knows the Holy Miser was a turkey.  He gave lots
of tzadaka secretly, but he was so humble that whenever anyone
came to him asking for alms, he shouted at them and chased them
away, and then secretly sent them a challa.           
Gvalt, everyone want to be Clark Kent.

So ok:  We are responsible not only for doing good deeds; but also
for not letting others get the impression that we have done sins;
because then they may think it's ok to do sins.
So Moshe Rabbenu gave us a  complete financial statement. 

So I must not lead others astray, and must not let them use
something I did to lead thenmselves astray.

But this applies only to reasonable men of good faith.

It does not apply to someone with less IQ than an extinct dinosaur
with a hangover; and it does not apply to nitpicking pettifogging
academicians.

If someone can logicall draw a preposerous conclusion from
something I did, that's his problem, not my responsibility.

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