Did you know that ninety percent of those questioned in a recent survey conducted by psychologist and best-selling author, Dr. Leo Buscaglia, responded that they had not one person with whom they could share their most intimate secrets? Did you know that many people are afraid to reach out, to touch, to visit, to make the first move, even though hospitals are recruiting volunteers to go into surgery and hold a patient's hand during surgery?
And did you know that in certain parts of California patients often hire a friend for seven dollars an hour to hold their hand while they are dying? Disgusting? And did you know that hugging improves health by raising the hemoglo-bin level in the blood stream? It also removes barriers between people. It tears down walls that cause alienation and loneliness, that causes people to lose control and go off the deep end.
It's true, hugging is magical. Yet many people are afraid.
And it was true for me until fourteen years ago. I was frozen in fear. Perhaps I hadn't come of age. I was afraid of how others saw me. I was fearful of being myself. I suppose I feared rejection.
Until I hit rock bottom, following a series of devastat-ing events (some of which were traced back to my orphanage days) did I learn to communicate.
Through much practice, I learned I could trust. I learned to communicate what I really thought, not just talk "party talk." I developed my verbal skills, to enjoy conversa-tion around a table. Eventually I relearned my former public speaking skills that I'd allowed to lay dormant. And within the past few years I've spoken to more than fifty area clubs and organizations, including the Downtown Shreveport Rotary Club.
I learned the ultimate high, the thrill, of doing that which produces tremendous fear. I again experienced the exhilaration of speaking before a crowd. In looking out across my audience, I'm made aware that we are much more alike than we are different. I came to see that everyone has a secret cross-and some silent fears.
And that's okay as I have mine too. We all have unre-solved areas of self-doubt. I learned that it's only as I share my vulnerable fears that others will dare to open up and share theirs with me. We all fear exposure of our weaknesses.
In learning to put my insights down upon paper, I began to write poetry, which led to numerous publications, including three books of poetry.
Hopefully I am helping others let down their guards as I exploit myself through writing about the hidden, painful periods of my life. I know we will never reach our place in life unless we help others to find theirs. We must activate the law of reciprocity for it to go into effect, as life is reciprocal. We can't do it alone, nor would we want to. So much of the joy we find must be expressed to be appreciated.
We can commit the greatest random acts of kindness through giving a touch or a hug, as we affirm another's worth. After all, "we are angels flying with only one wing and we can only fly while embracing each other."