Nodding Off
I am getting tired. I need some help and this is not about sleeping although I could use some rest. As much as I try to stop doing something I have yet to break the habit. I figure that the best way to cure me is for someone to walk along behind and every time I do it, they haul off and whack me up side of the head with a stick; and that stick should be no smaller than a pool cue, or baseball bat but ideally it would be Buford Pusser with his fence post. I am trying very hard to get rid of one of the little habits that are so male that it is getting me read big time. Because I am not full-time, I still need to use it when in male mode but I need something to remind me to turn it off when I am en femme.That annoying little habit with the big signal is a little head nod. Funny how a simple one inch slow nod of the head says so much in this world of non-verbal communication. In the male world, men are very private animals. They tend to keep to themselves, but as they pass each other on the street, they give that short nod to show that they acknowledge the other male�s existence. And it is proper etiquette for a nod from one male to be returned with a similar nod from the other male (I have not found this in Emily Post's book but I am sure that there is a male version of it out there - probably a pamphlet � but I am sure its covered). That is my problem, I still need to use this male nod acknowledgment when I am trying to pass as a male so it is hard to unlearn.
Women on the other hand smile when they meet. Two women passing on the street with smile at each other and often say "Hi". I think this is much nicer than a nod of the head. Now here is an interesting point, men generally do not to women but some do. Some men will smile; some will say "Hi" and the very gallant will slightly bow but only in a confined spaced. Women in response will smile and may lower their eyes, but they do NOT nod. So the other day when a man smiled at me, I nodded back. There was a very puzzled look in his eyes. Why did I do it??? Again it is an old habit that I have been trying to turn off but how can I unlearn something when I still have a need to use it.
I need a switch. Some sort of an on/off switch that I can use that will rid me of all my male habits when I do not need them. Now that I am aware of this nodding I find myself doing it all the time; so much so that it reminds me of that dog you used to see in the back of cars nodding its head up and down or that bird thingie that was found in every sleazy bar (not to say that I used to visit sleazy bars) that would bob up and down in a glass of water. Maybe I should relocate to Japan where everyone bows no matter what gender but I will probably bow wrong there too. Possibly I can get Mr. Miyagi to train me, �nod on, nod off� and become the next TG Kid. Barring that, the most effect non-nodding device is a neck brace. So maybe if I wear one long enough then I can stop this habit. But an on/off switch would be nice. That way I can keep the makeup off the brace.
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