Guided Hunts
    As of now we only guide one type of hunt.  It is for the Elusive Ditch Cougar.  Here is a little information on the hunts:
Tools for the Hunt:
>  Baseball Bat
>  Gun(optional)
>  Spotlights
>  Knives
>  Slingshot
>  Pitchfork
>  Gloves(for beating cougar)
>  Any 4x4(offroad capable vehicle) with a place to store harvested cougars.
>  Any other deadly weapon.
Expected Outcome:
>  1 to 3 Cougars per night
>  Any other creature that dares to challenge you.
>  Mostly cougars, but you will occasionally get a Coon, or a Skunk
Skills needed:
>  Running Skills(to chase Cougars, ect.)
>  Shooting Skills
>  Driving Skills(occasionally, most of the time guides will drive)
Procedure
    The procedure that we use to hunt Ditch Cougars is simple.  There are normally 4 people, but there can be more.  What we do, is we drive around on roads(preferably gravel) and look for Ditch Cougars.  As the name describes, they are usually in the ditches.  Once a Ditch Cougar is spotted all of the people except the driver exit the vehical and begin to pursue the Ditch Cougar.  One of the guys has a gun, one has a bat, and the third has a slingshot.  Each also has a shiner so they can see the Ditch Cougar.  The first wound is usually from the gun.  Once that is done we move in on the cat, and beat it over the head with the bat several times until it is dead(for sure).  Thats it!!!
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Warning!!!-
Ditch Cougar hunting is very dangerous.  You should not try to hunt Ditch Cougars without a guide, or a professional Ditch Cougar hunter.  If you do, you may be severly injured.  Our guides are well trained to handle the Ditch Cougars, and have gotten used to getting bitten and scratched.
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    If you would like more information on a Ditch Cougar hunt, you may contact me at [email protected], or call me at       1-800-YOU-DUMB You can also book a time for a Ditch Cougar hunt.  The cost per night per person is $50, and if there are not any Ditch Cougars harvested 50% of it is refunded.
This is just a joke, and we take no responsibility for anyones actions due to this page.
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