REAL FIRST NAME: Steven (NOT "Stephen") STATS & PERSONALITY: 35, 6', 210#, short brown hair, brown eyes (20/20), clean-cut, average guy-next-door type, NON-SMOKER, laidback/easygoing, independent, considerate, generous, practical, loves kids and would like to have some, and a positively twisted sense of humor BIRTHDATE: April 29, 1969 - Taurus / Year of the Cock (Rooster) CURRENT RESIDENCE: Roswell, GA PREVIOUS RESIDENCE: Portland, OR PLACE OF BIRTH: Fargo, ND (yes, they DO talk that way there!) RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single OUT STATUS: Out to family, friends, and co-workers, but don't make a big deal about it otherwise PET(S): 1 former cat (I had to give away) :-( - Lukas HOBBIES: Music, humor, writing, movies/TV, skiing, technology OCCUPATION: Computer Tech Support (YAWN!) SOME FAVORITE MUSIC ARTISTS: XTC, Peter Gabriel, Robyn Hitchcock, Blur, Björk, They Might Be Giants, The Beatles, Adrian Belew, Split Enz, Depeche Mode, Oingo Boingo, Crowded House, Ultravox, Laurie Anderson, The Fixx, Genesis, Rush, Yello, Neil Finn, Mick Karn, Fountains of Wayne MUSIC ARTISTS WHO MAKE ME WANT TO CHANGE THE STATION: Nirvana, Violent Femmes, Pearl Jam, Everclear, Offspring, Kid Rock, The Bloodhound Gang FAVORITE ALBUM COVER: XTC's Go 2 SOME FAVORITE FILMS: Airplane!, Monty Python/Holy Grail, Zorro the Gay Blade, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, The Man with Two Brains, ANY Jackie Chan, Pee Wee's Big Adventure, Star Wars, ST: Wrath of Khan, Young Frankenstein, Strange Brew, High Anxiety, The Beatles' HELP!, Men in Black, Austin Powers, What's Up Tiger Lily? BEST DISNEY MOVIES TO USE AS A MASTURBATORY AID: The Jungle Book (w/ Jason Scott Lee) and George of the Jungle (w/ Brendan Fraser) SOME FAVORITE TV SHOWS: Seinfeld, Ellen, Friends, Whose Line is It Anyway?, The Daily Show, Monty Python, South Park, MST3K, The Simpsons, David Letterman, X-Files, Drew Carey, Kids in the Hall, The Larry Sanders Show, Norm, Spin City, Fawlty Towers, Frasier, Will and Grace, 3rd Rock from the Sun, Soap, Politically Incorrect, Just Shoot Me, Futurama, Late Late Show, Family Guy, That '70s Show, Police Squad, King of the Hill, Absolutely Fabulous SOME FAVORITE COMEDIANS: Steve Martin, Ellen Degeneres, Bobcat Goldthwait, Paul Reiser, Paula Poundstone, Gilbert Gottfried, Allan Havey, Jake Johansen, Jon Stewart, Louie C.K., Norm MacDonald, Jerry Seinfeld, Garry Shandling, Judy Tenuta, Barry Sobel, Kevin Meaney, Jeffrey Ross, The Amazing Johnathan, Jonathan Katz, Lizz Winstead, Margaret Cho, Maryellen Hooper, David Spade, Stephen Lynch FAVORITE REPUBLICANS: Ben Stein, Arianna Huffington SOME FAVORITE BOOKS: "Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Idiot" by Al Franken, "Self-Help for the Bleak" by Rich Hall, "If You Can't Say Something Nice" by Calvin Trillan, "Portrait of Dorian Gray" by Oscar Wilde, "Beavis & Butt-head's Ensucklopedia," "The Straight Dope" (1-3) by Cecil Adams, "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" (1-3) and "Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency" by Douglas Adams, "Deadeye Dick" by Kurt Vonnegut SOME FAVORITE FOODS: My favorite meal is meatballs, mashed potatoes and gravy. I tend to like rather simplistic, 'plain' foods (e.g. cheese/sausage/pepperoni/hawaiian pizza; spaghetti w/o mushrooms or tomato chunks in the sauce; sandwiches w/ just lettuce, mustard & mayo; etc.) and not too many vegetables, especially cooked. I also LOVE spicy food, especially in asian cuisine (e.g. kung pao, pad thai, thai curries, etc.) FAVORITE RESTAURANTS: The Roxy (SW Stark), Thien Hong (NE Sandy), Quizno's, Brasserie Montmartre, Papa Murphy's Pizza (well, not really a RESTAURANT), Gustav's (NE Sandy), Applebee's, Fuddrucker's, Red Lobster, Rasa Sayang (Roswell, GA), Flying Pie Pizzeria, Zien Hong (NE Sandy), Blimpie, Ho Ho (SW 39th & Powell), Thanh Thao (SE Hawthorne), Saigon Kitchen (NE Broadway) FAVORITE DRINKS: Iced tea (Lipton), hot tea (Constant Comment), Squirt, Coca-Cola, Snapple (Ginseng Tea and Kiwi-Strawberry), grapefruit soda, orange juice (w/o pulp), milk (2% and preferably Alpenrose), mocha (Starbucks usually, though Peet's Coffee and Seattle's Best are really good), long island tea, Bailey's, Heather Cream, Bacardi Limon, and various schnapps (mainly butterscotch and peppermint) FAVORITE WEATHER: Partly to mostly cloudy, 50-65 degrees, low humidity (I know...I'M A FREAK!!!) FAVORITE INCENSE: Night Queen (an odd coincidence, I HOPE!) SOME FAVORITE MUSIC LYRIC QUOTES: "People will always be tempted to wipe their feet on anything with 'Welcome' written on it." --> "Snowman" (XTC) "If I had you, I could never ever ask for anything again as long as I live." --> "I Live" (Jason Falkner) "I don't want the world...I just want your half!" --> "Ana Ng" (TMBG) "A heart without love is a song with no words and a tune to which no one is listening." --> "Beating of Hearts" (XTC) "He'd never make love to a loaf of bread, unless of course he found one in his bed." --> "Bass" (Robyn Hitchcock) "The Church of Matches anoints in ignorance with gasoline The Church of Matches grows fat by breathing in the smoke of dreams It's quite obscene." --> "Books Are Burning" (XTC) SOME FAVORITE MOVIE QUOTES: "Just because I don't know what it is doesn't mean I'm lying." --> Strange Brew "It's the way these pantses are cut...you don't feel so constrainted." --> Zorro, the Gay Blade "What was the middle thing again?" --> A Fish Called Wanda "Why am I all drippings with goo?" --> Ghostbusters II "I don't want to be a lesbian; I don't want to move to New Jersey; and where's the cheese...where's the cheese on these goddamn f**king fries?!" --> Trick "If you do doubt your courage or your strength, come no further, for death awaits you all with nasty, big, pointy teeth." --> Monty Python and the Holy Grail FAVORITE PERSONAL JOKE PICKUP LINE: "Do you like that gum that squirts in your mouth?" --> Me FAVORITE DIRTY PUN AD SLOGANS: "Let the natural beauty of your wood shine through!" --> EnDust "If it doesn't get all over the place, it doesn't belong in your face!" --> Carl's Jr. "Once you pop, you can't stop!" --> Pringles "I feel like chicken tonight, like chicken tonight!" --> Kentucky Fried Chicken TURN ONS: Intelligence, great sense of humor/wit, longhaired guys, jeans & T-shirt guys, exotic-looking guys, perfect skin, boyish/cute faces, water (pool, bath, jacuzzi, etc.), running shorts, muscles, tight shirts, cuddling, kissing, touching, watching a guy sleep, guys who look sexy in glasses (see 'Intelligence') NOTE: I don't need a gorgeous buffed guy with long hair -- eyecandy is HARDLY necessary! TURN OFFS: Smoking, drugs, racism, self-righteousness, control freaks, jealousy, snobbery, negativity, moodiness, whining, selfishness, melodrama, jock straps, leather (other than jackets), "daddies" (and their "sons"!), most facial hair & especially full beards, big tattoos, major piercing, anything that says "Diet" or "Nutrasweet" on it A FEW PET PEEVES: Casual cyclers who dress like they're running the Tour de France, straight guys calling themselves "bi-curious" or "str8-curious" (if you THINK you're straight and have some homosexual desires, you're GAY-curious!), people who regularly misquote movie/TV/play/etc. lines, people who seem as if they've NEVER seen a fast food restaurant's menu and take forever to order there SOME FAVORITE GUYS: Brendan Fraser, Eric Nies, Paul Nicholls, Dean Cain, Taye Diggs, Scott Wolf, Heath Ledger, Steve Burton, Mark Wahlberg, Jason Scott Lee, Leonardo DiCaprio, Robin Shou, Ryan Reynolds, Antonio Sabato, Jr., and several models: Scott Madsen, Tyson Beckford, Marcus Schenkenberg, Joel West, Brian Buzzini, Frank Sepe, Beiron Andersson FANTASIES: One night with a heavyweight bodybuilder (just to see what it's like!), sex in a bath/jacuzzi/pool/etc., making out in jeans & a t-shirt in the rain, sex in a public place (movie theater, in a park, etc.), to name a few (MAYBE even a threesome! :-O). NOTE: Some fantasies are best left that way! WHAT I REALLY LOOK FOR IN A GUY: I tend to have more in common with guys a little bit younger than myself, but I generally like a somewhat offbeat guy who is honest, humorous, a NON-SMOKER (or VERY light smoker), caring, intelligent, independent, easygoing, under 40 years old (but older than 25 preferably too, though SOME guys outside of that age range can still be desirable), clean-shaven (MAYBE a light goatee), enjoys quite a few of the same things (especially music), and can enjoy simple pleasures and quiet nights cuddled up together
Any questions??? Email me!
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