The Owl and the Pussy Cat
Who exactly is the "Owl" and who is the "Pussy Cat"? Arthur Anderson is the
Owl guarding Investor interest and Enron, the "Pussy Cat", too clever by
far, creating interlocking businesses for the pleasure of Wall Street.
Went to sea -
The business Enron is involved in, and the accounting sleight of hand
condoned by Anderson, is "at sea" from what should be considered good moral
practices.
In a beautiful pea-green boat -
Need we say that the color of money is green.
They took some honey
And plenty of money
Wrapped up in a five-pound note. -
Along the way there was plenty of room for the "honeys". Now wrapping it up
in a five-pound note takes a bit of imagination, let us just say that this
refers to the wraps of paper from the interlocking financial deals.
The Owl looked up to the stars above, -
The financial houses, their brokers and investment specialist are surely the
stars referred to.
And sang to a small guitar,
Nothing but the best "news" came from Enron as it reported earnings
which were "played" to the press.
"O lovely Pussy, O Pussy my love,
What a beautiful Pussy you are,
You are,
You are!
What a beautiful Pussy you are."
Romance is alive and well, and of course, Enron's paying of "Consulting fees" certainly was music to Anderson's ears.
Pussy said to the Owl,
You see nothing, you hear nothing, you know nothing (Sargent Schultz of
Hogan's Heros, was the guiding light for these corporate giants in their
formative years.)
"You elegant fowl,
How charmingly sweet you sing! -
What fantastic music we make together. You approval of the annual
reports is music to my ears.
Oh! let us be married;
Too long we have tarried:
But what shall we do for a ring?"
Companies that are supposedly audited and their auditors, once in bed,
should at least legitimize their relationship.
The sailed away,
For a year and a day,
During the past eight or so years the Clinton administration gave a free
pass to anything that would "stimulate" the economy. Past Treasury
Secretaries were under the covers with Wall Street playing games.
To the land where the bong-tree grows; -
Need it be said that many of the usual arrangements involved
"off-shore" investment(s).
And in warm, sunny climes no less!
And there in the wood
A Piggy-wig stood,
Investors stood in line to buy stock in Enron. They expected the stock
to increase value, which it did, and are surely the pig(s) in this case.
With a ring at the end of his nose,
His nose,
His nose,
With a ring at the end of his nose.
In the farm community of long ago, hog-rings were a bit of metal
inserted into a hog's nose to prevent him from rooting (destroy the ground,
as he turned it over searching for grubs and other delicacies.) A single
ring was ineffective and the typical practice was to put three or more in
the cartilage at snout's end. In the go-go economy of the 1990's, it was
root hog, or die! Weak restrictions placed by the SEC and other agencies,
did not restrict business activities and there were(are) few rings in the
nose(s).
"Dear Pig, are you willing
To sell for one shilling
Your ring?"
Since we know that the Owl and Pussy Cat went to sea with a five pound
note plus money and honey, a shilling which is only one twentieth of a pound
seems to be a bit on the cheap side as an offer to investors.
Said the Piggy, "I will."
They (the investment community) found investors (whoops, the pigs)
jumping at the cheap stock price. How easy it is to find the price of
people who have no morals.
So they took it away, -
Now the pig was free to root and wallow in the market, having full faith
in what the company and its auditors told them. Enron employees bet the
farm on the company and invested their life's savings in the company
.
And were married next day
By the Turkey who lives on the hill.
Any similarity between the SEC and a turkey is purely intended.
They dined on mince and slices of quince,
No one ever questioned the extravagances of the company officers and
their appetites for big pay-outs. After all, everyone was doing it.
Which they ate with a runcible spoon;
It was quite a party. No plastic knives and forks from MacDonalds here.
All lived high on the hog (so to speak) The Dow, NASDAQ, and other markets
soared. The dot.com industry rolled in cash. Investment houses paid
million-dollar salaries and bonuses. Book advances were paid in the
millions to those who promised to tell all.
And hand in hand -
Not a dissenting voice was heard for eight years.
On the edge of the sand -
The favorite saying of the past administration was that they had "drawn
a line in the sand". Visitors to the beach recognize that with the incoming
tide, sand castles and other man made marks in the sand are quickly
obliterated. Their tracks were erased (shall we say shredded.).
The danced by the light of the moon,
The moon,
The moon,
They danced by the light of the moon.
Certainly the liberal press was not about to expose the antics to the
full light of day. Softening appearances in a dim light to enhance some
features and hide others is an old trick of the photographer.
And so they danced as did those to Nero and his fiddle.
***
Edward Lear composed The Owl and the Pussy Cat. He was born, May 12, 1812,
in London. The Book of Nonsense was published in 1846. His original book
went through several editions and was followed by Nonsense Songs and Stories
(1871), More Nonsense Songs, Pictures, &c. (1872), Laughable Lyrics (1877),
and Nonsense Botany and Nonsense Alphabets. Illustrations of the books are
from the hand of Lear.
He died in 1888.
*****
This is not just figuratively speaking. Anyone who has succeeded in putting a cat in a trap, box, carrier, sack, bag, cage, etc., recognizes that once the cat discovers the problem, she or he is not about to let it happen again.
Another truth, is that you can (with difficulty) put one cat in a contrivance of some sort and with luck add a second one as well, but woe be unto you if you be so stupid as to try to increase the number to three. Now, not only do you have one irate cat in hand but two that are not on the best of terms with each other or the box. Escape is the only thing on their individual and collective minds and while you struggle to persuade puss to join the others in confinement, they launch an assault that makes a neighborhood riot seem mild.
One quickly discovers that cats possess teeth with which to grasp and chew ( William Cowper Brann discovered when he attempted to bag his "domestic" tom and remove him from the premises.) and claws designed to do more than climb trees. The hind legs are capable of doing more damage than the front as they embed themselves and then with a quick motion, tear away in a backward stroke. And of course the convulsing cat in its loose skin appears to be able to turn and twist seemingly with out limit, no matter how firmly one attempts to grasp "kitty."
Now the Pigs and Turkeys are coming out into the full glare of the sun as well as the Owl and Pussy Cat after a night of their indulgences. The Clinton administration created these problems by looking the other way. The smell from the pig sty will demand corrections; not just of the offending companies but Federal Regulators as well. Congress will not be exempt from blame!
As Congress begins to explore the deep inner secrets of the financial world and shine light upon them, there's no putting the cat back in the bag.
Currier and Ives produced a print (1860), in which the "Spirit of Discord" (a cat) was let out of the bag following the Republican National Convention at which Abraham Lincoln was nominated for President. Participants were; Abraham Lincoln, Henry J. Raymond, Hannibal Hamlin, and Horace Greeley. Charles Sumner was the one holding the bag, while Lincoln attempted to put it back inside the bag using a split rail.
****
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