The old man comes, carefully, down the stairs to the kitchen. And, unexpectedly takes the next step that isn't there with a bone shuddering stop. Pausing, he searched the dark room for the dangling light cord, and cautiously moves toward the center of the room. This is unfortunate as the cat sitting in the middle of the floor is discovered only as he steps on its tail, causing as you might expect, great pain and no little start for the old man.
Finally, after groping in the air, he finds the dangling cord. Pulling it, he is blinded by the sudden light, which causes him to cover his eyes and then he looks about the room. There is the offended cat, whom he stoops to pet and caress.
With apparent pain he stands and moving to the kitchen counter, he selects from a number of cans, one that must be cat food. He shows the can to the cat; returns to the counter and proceeds to open it with great difficulty with the hand-cranked can opener. Finally opened, he places the lid on the counter, raises the can to his nose, smiles appreciably, and offers the cat a smell as well.
Taking a spoon or perhaps a fork from the counter, he dishes out a portion of the can's contents into the cat's dish - pushing the cat away so he can add a second helping. Then standing with difficulty, he once again sniffs the can's contents. Taking the fork, he takes a small bite. Liking what he finds, he turns his back to the cat, and eats all that remains. Guiltily he looks back at the cat, once again he bends low and this time pours the remaining liquid from the can into the cat's dish.
He stands, wipes his mouth on his sleeve, places the can on the counter, and steps to the center of the room.
He pulls the light cord; the room is dark. From the darkness you hear, " Good night and God Bless." Richard Bernard Skelton; born July 18, 1913, died Septermber 17, 1997. "Red" Skelton was a pantomime artist of the highest order.
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ABOUT Joe Wortham