Your Husband Is Overweight When :
*He tells you it isn't his stomach, that he just has a low chest.
*He's capable of touching his toes, but only with his belly
(it's a start)
*He does wonderful impressions~ like~ eat like a pig and drink like a fish.
*His idea of a well balanced meal is a big mac in each hand.
*His idea of pumping iron is lifting a fork, spoon and knife.

You Know A Man Can't cook When...

~you catch him ironing the bacon....
~when a cake calls for 2 whole eggs and he throws in 2 whole eggs (shells and all)
~When a recipe calls for a little flour and he throws in a daisy
~When he won't even lick his own fingers
~When you see him removing the batteries for the smoke detector
~When everything he cooks is blackened and he calls it Cajun- I mean even the salads...