The Golden Boy. How many times have I heard myself referred to as that? It's scary to think that in the few years I've been alive I've been called that more times than I can count. My parents, Lynn Harless and Randall Timberlake, have called me that for as long as I can remember. My twin sister, Belinda Drew (Benda D or Justice, depending on what mood we're in) calls me it when we're away from our parents, mocking them and everyone else who calls me it.

Belinda. She's the one person I've always been able to count on. She's one of the strongest people I know. She doesn't think I see it, but I do. I see how our parents treat her, like a second class citizen, subhuman. She tries to hide it from me, not wanting me to see what kind of people they really are. As much as I love them, it angers me to think they could treat her that way. Don't they see how wonderful she really is? Am I the only person who sees it? No Mama's brother, Edward, and her parents see it.

Edward. I'm so glad for him to be apart of our lives, even though he lives so far away. He plays father to Belinda, which I will always be thankful of. If it were not for him I fear to think of how Belinda would be. He helps her to have a normal life. He's been there for her since the beginning but even more since Mama and Dad got divorced, inviting her to stay with him while our parents figured out the custody arrangements after Belinda said she couldn't stay at Grandma and Grandpa Timberlake's because they treated her no better than Mama and Dad.

When Mama finally got custody of both of us she was ready to move on with her life. She remarried to Paul Harless, who's a nice man and does try to treat Belinda the same as me, but she brushes it off. I asked her once why she did this, she just shrugged and said I wouldn't understand. Mama also began to take more of an interest in my career after the divorce. I was gonna be her little star if she had to quit her job and work full time to achieve it. Belinda used to giggle to herself when Mama would come home and tell me about the latest thing she'd gotten me involved in, and shoot me looks of mock pity when it came time for my piano lessons as she put on her jacket to catch a bus to one of the studios uptown where Edward paid for her to have piano and dance lessons.

Belinda didn't see Dad after the divorce, I believe that was upon Edward's request, but Belinda won't say. Dad remarried after the divorce too. After he married Lisa he didn't come take me every weekend like he had when they first got divorced, which although I missed seeing him, I was glad for because Belinda was at the house alone on those weekends, or so she felt, as she'd confessed to me one night. I used to tell Belinda about Lisa but I soon realized she wasn't listening because she knew she'd never meet Lisa, and if she did it wouldn't matter because they wouldn't spend time together.

====

"Belinda, I don't want you to go," I said looking at her with tears in my eyes.

She look down, to avoid looking into my eyes as she finished packing her stuff. "I have to, Justin. Lynn and Edward have already signed the papers. There's not much I can do," she answered.

"I don't care! This isn't supposed to be how it is! We're supposed to be together! Twins aren't supposed to be supported!"

"Belinda, your uncle is here," Mama said dully as she appeared in the bedroom doorway. "Tell her good-bye, Justin, and come on. You've got to be at the studio in an hour," she added glazing at me.

"I hate you," I screamed at her before running out of the room.

"This is your fault, Belinda. If your father had wanted you, this wouldn't be happening," I heard Mama say.

Belinda came into my room a few minutes later, to comfort me, I could tell by the look in her eyes. She wanted to protect me from seeing Mama be the way she was to her. She found me crying on my bed.

Placing a hand on my back she said, "Justin, it's not like we won't get to talk to each other anymore, you know."

"It's not fair! Why doesn't anyone see how much I need you around?"

"This isn't about you, Justin," Edward's voice came from the doorway. "It's not fair to your sister to live here with no one to love her the way your mother loves you."

"I love her that way," I answered rolling over to look at our uncle. "You know that, don't you?" I asked her.

"I know," she nodded, wiping at my tears.

"I promise to bring her back to visit you, Justin, whenever she's got a break from school," Edward offered.

"Justin, we need to get to the studio, come on," Mama interrupted us.

"Good-bye, Justin," Belinda said kissing my forehead.

"Good-bye, Belinda," I answered hugging her tightly. "I'll call you when I get home, okay?"

"Okay. Je tu aime," she spoke softly. (I love you)

"Je tu aime et je m'ennuierai de tu," I answered (I love you and I will miss you)

"Je m'ennuierai de tu trop," she said before exiting the room quickly. (I will miss you too.)

====

Orlando was different after Belinda moved to Kansas to be with Edward and his family. I spent most of my time at the studio now working the Mickey Mouse Club or hanging out with my fellow cast members. I spent the most time with Britney, Christina, and JC, the ones I'd been close with when Belinda still lived with me. Christina was the same age as me and Britney was a year younger but still mature and Mama loved her, used to refer to her as her "daughter". She seemed to always miss the glares I would send her way, but Britney didn't and asked me about it, but I shook it off. JC was five years older than me and was like the older brother I never had. He didn't mind at all hanging out with me even though I was younger, like some of the other older people did.

Belinda used to call me late at night the first few weeks she'd been there and cry because it was so hard living in Independence because she was an outsider. I felt so bad for her but I didn't know what I could do for her in Orlando. I was happy when she called me one day and told me that she'd met three girls that she seemed to have a lot in common with and who made living in Independence not so bad. She told me they'd introduced her to a new religion called Wicca. It wasn't until she began to practice it she told me it was Witchcraft, but she explained it wasn't an bad as they had taught us at church. It seemed to help her a lot so I was understanding about it. Mama sat me down one night after Edward had told her about Belinda's change to make sure that I hadn't given up on Christianity, other than that she didn't seem to worry about Belinda's choice of religion.

It was during that last year that I noticed Belinda started to hate Britney. She tried not to be rude to her, but she'd slip up sometimes, although she'd quickly apologized. When I asked her way she was that way about Britney she explained about Mama telling Edward how wonderful she thought Britney was and wished she had a daughter just like her. I remembered the conversation and how Belinda had stopped Edward when he started to tell Mama that he'd realized while Belinda was living with him that she was quite talented, although he'd paid for Belinda's activities, it wasn't until she moved in with him that he realized how talented she really was because Belinda didn't talk about it much. Belinda told me she stopped him because she knew Mama hadn't cared for thirteen years and doubted she was going to start.

When the Mickey Mouse Club ended I was crushed. I loved being apart of the show and I'd become very good friends with everyone on the show and I didn't like the idea that I would get to see them everyday. Britney was going to go back to Louisiana and Christina back to Pennsylvania, but JC would return to Memphis with Mama, Paul, and me that summer so that we could work on demos and Belinda joined us for parts of the summer.

After the summer JC returned to Maryland, where his family lived, and Mama decided she liked Orlando better so we moved back there. During auditions for various things I met a man, who was about ten years older than me, named Chris Kirkpatrick. We'd sit and talk to each other at the auditions occasionally and he'd told me about the idea he had to start a vocal group like the Backstreet Boys of his own. I was still shocked when I got a call from him asking me if I wanted to join and if I knew of anyone who'd want to join as well. After Mama and I agreed it'd be a good thing to do I called JC and told him about it, he agreed right away, and came out to Orlando shortly after. We found our fourth member, Joey Fatone, at a dance club in Orlando one night. Chris worked with him at Universal Studio and JC knew him from high school. After we got our fifth member, Lance Bass, a semi-shy bass singer from Mississippi, recommended to us by the vocal coach Belinda and I had both went to in Memphis, and had a name (*NSYNC) the first person I called, when I knew it was really happening, was Belinda. She was very excited for me.

====

"Who's Justin talking to?" Josh asked the other three glancing at me.

"Justice," Chris shrugged. "Whoever that is."

"What I would like to know is when did Curly learn to speak French?" Joey said.

"Maybe he's not all muscle after all," Lance chuckled.

"Well duh! He's got hair and a voice too," Chris joked.

"Tenez sur un deuxième. (Hold on a second) How about you stop talking about me?" I suggested pausing my phone conversation with Belinda. "Ce qui? Oh les garçdans le groups. Ils veulent savoir qui tu êtes. Tu devez? D'accord. Je tu aime aussi. Au revoir, B. Ayez l'amusement à l'école." (What? Oh guys in the group. They want to know who you are. You have to? Okay. I love you too. Good-bye, B. Have fun at school.)

"So who was that? Did ya pick yourself up a girlfriend when we went to France?" Chris asked after I hung up.

"Girlfriend? Hardly," I replied rolling my eyes.

"Oh come on! Who is she?" Joey asked.

"Justice is a friend of mine that I've known forever," I said, looking at Josh. "Josh, you know Justice... Benda," I added, hoping he'd remember what Belinda and I had decided to tell people about us.

"I know her," he nodded. "How's she doin?"

"Pretty good. She's gettin ready to go to Europe for the summer so she's supposed to call me tomorrow with an outline so we can figure out some times to meet up."

"Is Edward coming with her?"

"For a part of it," I nodded. "Just for the first city, though. Then he, Wayne, and Sandra will stay in England. She wants to give them time alone as a family before Wayne joins the Marines."

"So she's traveling around by her self?" Josh questioned. "Then why not have her travel with us?" he asked me after I nodded.

"She and Mom," I answered trailing off. "I'd love to have if I thought she'd agree but..."

"We'll get her convinced, Justin, I promise," Josh said wrapping his arms around my shoulders.

====

During that year is when things began to change. Belinda became Justice Randall to the world outside her friends and parts of our family. It started out as a joke between the two of us, it was gonna be Belinda's nickname when her and I were gonna be famous, singing together, kinda like Donny and Marie expect it was Justice Randall and Brenden Drew. She was gonna play piano while I'd play guitar and we'd write all our songs together. Of course that didn't happen but we kept the joke anyway, Belinda used it mostly to keep her friends she made in Independence from figuring out who exactly I was because they were fans of *NSYNC.

That year is also the year I figured out I liked Josh as more than just my friend. It wasn't the first I'd found myself being attracted to another guy but I didn't think much of it cause it was just little crushes and I still found girls attractive as well. Josh was the only guy that it didn't go way after a while, but I still didn't let it get to me.

I spent a lot of time on the phone with Belinda telling her about the group. She was always so happy about how well things were going and talked about how proud it made her whenever one of her friends would talk about us, me especially because she felt I deserved it. The night before Belinda was to meet up with us in Ireland was the night we-- she decided it would be easier to introduce her to the guys as my friend instead of my sister.

====

"Justin, man, calm down! We gotta do sound check, man," Joey said.

"I can't help it! Justice is supposed to be in today!!" I exclaimed. "I haven't seen her in what seems like forever."

"The sooner we get the sound check finished, the sooner you'll get to hang out with her when she gets here," Josh said.

I nodded. "You're right, Josh. Lets do this," I said. "Lonnie, can you hear me?" I said into my mic when we had it in place.

He turned and waved at me then turned back around to look at whoever he was talking to. I saw Josh wave at someone sitting behind Mama and Lance's mother, Diane. Whoever she was, she caught the attention of the other four quickly. It isn't until the other three ask Josh who she was that I looked at her.

"JUSTICE!!" I exclaimed, hopping off the stage. "You're finally here! Come meet the other guys! I've missed you so much," I said hugging her.

"Hello, Justice," Josh said smiling at her and giving her a hug.

"Dayum she fione," Joey said elbowing Chris, forgetting, as usual, that his mic was on.

I gave him a dirty look before introducing Justice to the guys. "Justice, this is Chris Kirkpatrick and the ball of hormones over there, is Joey Fatone. Joey, Chris, this is Justice Randall, my best friend in the whole world," I said pointing at each of them as I said their name.

"How'd the kid manage to get you as a friend? You're what, nineteen?" Joey asked.

"Try fifteen, spaz," I answered. "With a warning that if you touch her, I'll kill ya so don't even think about," I said, smacking Joey's arm. "I said don't think about it," I joked.

We teased each other for a little longer before I noticed Justice looking at Lance who was sitting on the edge of the stage talking to his mom.

"That's Lance Bass, come I'll introduce you," I whispered in her ear, leading her over to him. "Lance, this is Justice Randall," I said catching Lance's attention.

"Nice to meet you," he said shaking her hand.

"Nice to meet you too," she said smiling at him.