WE ARE KNOWN AS THE SHITPIT MAFIA, SHITPIT CULT, SHITPIT POSSE, SHITPIT GANG, THOSE FUCKING BASTARDS WHO TRASHED THE DRAINS, ECT.
WHAT DO WE DO?
WE GO FROM DRAIN TO DRAIN SLOWLY BLOCKING IT. WE DO THIS UNTIL THE DRAIN IS COMPLETLY BLOCKED AND NOTHING CAN GET IN OR OUT OF IT. THEN THE SMELL SLOWLY TAKES OVER AND THE TOXIC WASTE IS LEFT BEHIND. THIS COSTS THE GOVERNMENT THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS TO REPAIR. WE ALSO TAKE PART IN OTHER ILLEGAL ACTIVITIES SUCH AS THE FOLLOWING. GRAFFITI, BREAKING WINDOWS, TRASHING PUBLIC/ PRIVATE PROPERTY OF ALL SORTS. SMASHING VENDING MACHINES, COFFEE MACHINES, MAKING FLOORS SLIPPERY SO PEOPLE FALL OVER, DEAL ILLEGAL FIREWORKS AND SMALL EXPLOSIVES, ATTACK INNOCENT PEOPLE ON THE STREET AND THROW THEM IN RUBBISH, SLASH TIRES OF BUSES, BADGE, THROW THINGS, TRASH CONSTRUCTION SITES, TAKE OVER ABONDEON BUILDINGS, VANDALISE OUR NAME ON ALL SORTS OF PROPERTY AND THE LIST GOSE ON. BUT WE MAINLY VANDALISE DRAINS AND THE PLUMMING/ SEWAGE SYSTEMS. WHEN WE HAVE SUCCESSFULLY BLOCKED A DRAIN 100% IT IS THEN KNOWN AS A SHITPIT.
WHY DO WE DO THIS?
WE DO THIS FOR SEVERAL REASONS. WE HAVE BEEN LEAD BY THE ULMITTY MOSES. HE TOLD US TO DO THIS. WE FOLLOW HIS COMMANDS. IF WE DO THIS WE WILL SLOWLY TAKE OVER THE WORLD. THEN COUNTRIES WILL BE PROTIONED OUT TO MEMEBERS OF THE MAFIA AND ALL THAT DON'T OBBAY OUR RATH SHALL BE THROWN INTO THE SHITPITS.
SEVERAL OTHER FACTORS CONTRIBUTED. WE GET BORED, WE TAKE PRIDE AND PLEASURE IN DESTROYING THINGS, IT MAKES US HAPPY AND IT PISSES SOCIETY OFF.
WHO IS MOSES?
WE HAVE CHOSEN TO FOLLOW THE WISDOM OF MOSES. MOSES IS A SPECIAL PERSON. WE BELIEV THAT HE HOLDS SPECIAL POWERS AND HE IS GOING TO REVEL THEM IN THE END! HE HAS COMMANDED SEVERAL OF THE SHITPIT HI RAKE' TO BLOCK DRAINS. HE HAS TOLD US IN OUR SLEEP IF WE FOLLOW HIS WAYS WE WILL BE REWARDED WITH SALVATION.
WHY ARE WE SO BIG?
IT STARTED OFF AS SEVERAL MEMBERS DOING THE WORK. WE STUCK POSTERS UP ADVERTISING US. TOLD THE YOUNGER GENERATIONS, ADVERTISED VIA PHONE CALSS AND INTERNET, WROTE SHITPIT MAFIA ON EVERY WALL AND PATHMENT, CHATTED TO PEOPLE FROM OTHER COUNTRIES ABOUT IT.
WHO IS OUR FOUNDER?
THE FOUNDER OF THE SHITPIT MAFIA IS TO REMAIN ALWAYS NAMELESS. IF THEY HAVE TO BE REFERED TO THEY MUST BE KNOWN AS THE MASTER. THE MASTER IS THE BRAINS BEHIND THE ORGANIZATION. HE/ SHE IS THE LEADER OF ORGANIZED CRIME. HE /SHE IS A FORMAL PERSON AND GIVES ALL ORDERS TO THE RIGHTHNAD MAN. HE THEN PASSES IT ON TO THE RINGLEADERS AND SO ON. THE MASTER WALKS AMONGST US ALL. HOWEVER NO ONE BUT THE RIGHT HAND MAN KNOWS THE LOCATION AND WHAT THE MASTER LOOKS LIKE. THE MASTER IS ALWAYS FORMAL IN ALL THE PHOTOS THE FACE IS BLURRED FOR SAFTEY REASONS. ONE OF THE HIGHEST RESPECTS TO RECIEVE FROM THE MASTER IS THE FORMAL CLAP. THE MASTER KNOWS ALL HE/SHE KNOWS WHERE YOU LIVE, WHO YOU ARE, WHAT YOU ATE FOR BREAKFAST AND WHO YOU NEXT DOOR NEIGHBOURS BEST FREIND'S MOTHER'S NAME. THE MASTER KNOWS ALL!
RANKINGS. SOME MEMBERS HAVE BEEN DERANKED AND UPRANKED
THE MASTER PROCLAIMS DEC 06
ALL SHITPIT MAFIA WEBSITES ARE ALL LICENCED TO THE SHITPIT MAFIA CODE. ANY BREACHING OF THIS CODE WILL RESULT IN HEAVY FINDS UP TO $5000 AND/ OR IMPRISONMENT.
THIS IS A MARKETING CAMPAING BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE SHITPIT MAFIA.
COPY RIGHT 2002
