If someone has a mid-life crisis while playing hide and seek, does he automatically lose because he can't find himself?
What color does a bald man put on his driver's licence?
If you throw a cat out a car window does it become kitty litter?
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?.
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
How many people thought of the Post-It note before it was invented but just didn't have anything to jot it down on?
If a synchronized swimmer drowns, does her partner also have to drown?
Can you be a closet claustrophobic?
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
There are 24 hours in a day, and 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?
Why is there an eject button on the VCR remote? Don't you have to get up to get to the tape?
When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting?
Why is lemon juice mostly artificial ingredients but dish washing liquid contains real lemons?
How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill herself, is it considered a hostage situation?
Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
If you spend your day doing nothing, how do you know when you're done?
Could someone ever get addicted to counseling? If so, how could you treat them?
Why is a women's prison called a penal colony?
If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why's it still #2?
Can atheists get insurance for acts of God?
If the Energizer Bunny attacks someone, is it charged with battery?
When vultures are on their deathbed, are they ever tempted to eat themselves?
Why doesn't superglue stick to its container?
When you choke a Smurf, what color does he turn?
If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?
Should crematoriums give discounts for burn victims?
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, who came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
How does a shelf salesman keep his store from looking empty?
Why does bottled water have an expiration date?
Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as 4's?
If you play a blank tape at full volume and have a mime for a neighbor, will he complain?
After eating, do amphibians have to wait an hour before getting out of the water?
If women ran the Pentagon, would missiles and submarines be shaped differently?
Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
Why do people who only eat natural foods drink decaffeinated coffee?
Can I get arrested for running into a Fire House yelling "Movie! Movie!" ?
Why are there Braille instructions on drive-up ATM's?