Gladiatrix Magazine's

2004 Woman of the Year

Portia Ophelia Van Buren IV

by Charlie Wembley, Editor-in-Chief

For the first six months of 2004, she ran wild.  She was FAWN.  In the short life of the organization, this period of dominance...no...this reign of terror...was unheard of.   Since it ended, it hasn't been replicated.  In fact, no one's come close to matching her sustained brilliance.  Through sheer force of will and unmatched guile, the slight Long Island socialite brought FAWN's best, brightest, strongest, and fastest to their knees.  Portia Ophelia Van Buren IV reached the mountain top and stayed there longer than anyone else, and some hard times since she had the FAWN World Championship taken from her by LaKeisha Bates and Jeanette Lansdale don't erase these accomplishments:

Six wins.

The FAWN World Championship.

Three successful title defenses.

Notches in her belt named for Shea London (twice), Chrissy Daniel, Jeanette Lansdale, Abby Hoffman, Ivy Armstrong.

She began 2004 by defeating Shea London in a Number One Contenders match.  At that point, it was what we had all come to believe was vintage Portia.  London, hungry to regain the FAWN Championship, was at the top of her game.  For most of the match, the sensational blonde dictated the pace with her breathtaking speed, agility, technique, and brilliance.  In the end, however, Portia's dark determination and killer instinct were too much, and London succumbed to the wily Van Buren.

Her next match was a brutal showdown with Chrissy Daniel.  The Killer Imp was fresh off two dominating victories, first ripping the World Championship from London, then crushing Jeanette Lansdale to retain the gold.  Against Portia, however, she met her match...and for the first time, we saw shades of Van Buren as a dominating ring presence.  She scratched, clawed, kicked, and punched her way relentlessly through Daniel, and we'd never seen the Killer Imp so beaten.  In the end, Portia won through smoldering tenacity, completing her ascension to the World Championship. 

Portia's first title defense was against Jeanette Lansdale, who'd vanquished Russian phenom Irena Malenakova two weeks earlier.  Lansdale came into the match intent on exacting revenge for the searing humiliation Portia dealt to her in December of 2003.  The blonde superstar seemed to have all the momentum and rumbled into that match as a prohibitive favorite.  Portia was smaller, weaker, slower, and less conditioned. 

This writer has always considered Portia's performance in that match to be remembered unfairly.  LaKeisha Bates ended that match when she knocked Lansdale out with Van Buren's polo mallet, the infamous Precious, prompting most people to remember the match as Lansdale's coronation abruptly derailed and Van Buren saved by Bates's interference.  So goes the legend.

The facts tell a different story.

Lansdale dominated the early going of the match, but Van Buren used the match rules to her advantage and battled back.  As the match progressed, Portia was more and more impressive, and when Bates delivered her fateful blow, Lansdale was not on the cusp of victory.  The stunning blonde was fighting tooth and nail to stay in the match against the slippery champion.  The match was still very much in doubt.

In her next defense, Portia faced Shea London, once again.  London defeated arch rival Chrissy Daniel in a Number One Contenders Match to earn another shot at Van Buren and the World Championship, but it would prove to be a Pyrrhic victory.  London left that match with an injured knee, and Van Buren capitalized on it, convincingly defeating the depleted Brit. 

Portia's third, and final, successful defense came against the Hardcore Hippie, Abby Hoffman.  This was probably Portia's most dominant performance.  Hoffman appeared to be in well over her head against the cruel champion and didn't put up much of a fight as Portia rolled to an easy win.

Van Buren would surrender her World Championship to LaKeisha Bates in her next match and Jeanette Lansdale would finally get her revenge.  Lansdale, appointed by FAWN CEO Bethany Christian as special guest referee, tortured both women throughout the match, spreading her vigilante justice around evenly, until directly intervening at the end to give the match to Bates.  While the match's outcome was still in question, Van Buren had control of the contest when Lansdale helped deliver the win to the challenger.  Most experts agree that without Lansdale's late match involvement (admittedly, Van Buren was breaking the rules by attempting to use a blunt foreign object) Portia would have retained the title.

Since then, Portia has lost two of her last three...one, a grudge match to Lansdale, the other, a forgivable match to newly acquired star Lindsey Locke.  Her win was a quality one, though, coming against the white hot Ivy Armstrong. 

Other women have left their marks on FAWN in 2004.  But Portia Van Buren IV left the most lasting impression.  She ushered the league along its path from regional phenom to international giant, setting the standard by which all future World Champions will be judged.  Both recent events and history have been unkind to Portia.  She's not loved by the fans.  She's a child of privilege, the daughter of a billionaire, and she has no problem reminding fans and fellow competitors of that fact.  She's harsh and arrogant and inspires a lot of ill will, allowing her detractors to delight in her recent struggles.  These factors diminish her accomplishments in the eyes of many fans and pundits.  But the facts are the facts.

Portia Van Buren dominated FAWN like no other woman to date.  She remains synonymous with the phrase "FAWN World Champion" even two women removed from the title.  She is still a deadly competitor and remains among FAWN's elite.

And she is the Gladiatrix Magazine 2004 Woman of the Year.