| There once was a man from Duluth Whos prick got shot off in his youth He fucked with his nose His fingers and toes And came through the hole in his tooth |
| There was a man from Rangoon Who was born five months too soon By his shitty luck He wasnt born by a fuck But scraped off the sheet with a spoon |
| There was a young lady from France Who got on the bus in a trance Everyone fucked her Apart from the conductor But he came twice in his pants |
| There once was a man named Mort Whos dick was incredibly short When he climed into bed His lady friend said Thats not a dick its a wart |
| There once was a young man named Lanny The size of his prick was uncanny His wife the poor old dear Took it in her ear And it came out of the hole in her fanny |
| In days of old When knights were bold And condoms werent invented They tied a sock Around there cock And babies were prevented |
| Hickory dickory dock Two mice ran up the clock One came down His bum was brown And so was the other ones cock |
| Mary had a little bike She rode it back to front And every time she pulled the brake The seat went up her cunt |
| Old mother hubard Went to the cupboard To give her poor dog a bone When she bent over Rover took over And gave her a bone of his own |
| There was a young vampire called mable Whose periods were always quite stable At every full moon She took out a spoon And drank her under the table |
| There was a young man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long he could suck it He said with a grin As he whiped off his chin If my ear were a cunt id fuck it |
| There once was a man named Ray Who fashioned a cunt out of clay But the heat of his prick Turned the clay into brick And tore all his foreskin away |
| There once was a man from Bombay Who ate gallons of beans each day He farted so loud He attracted a crowd But the smell made them run away |
| Jack and Jill went up the hill And planned to do some kissing Jack madea pass And grabbed her ass And now two of his teeth are missing |
| Hickory dickory clock Some chick was sucking my cock The clock struck two I blew my goo And dropped the bitch off at the next block |
| Mary had a little sheep And with the sheep she went to sleep The sheep turned out to be a lamb And nows shes got a little lamb |
| I like em in frills I like em in lace But i like ems best When there on me face |