Summer
2004
The early morning light was lemon yellow and rolled ashore on the backs of the waves. A few people were already on the sand, fishing or collecting shells that had washed on to the beach overnight. Seagulls hovered above Mattie as she tossed stale breadcrumbs into the air. He could hear her shrieks above the noise of the waves when one of the birds dived too close to her head. He smiled as she turned to wave at him before jogging down to the water’s edge. Despite the season, the ocean was still toe numbingly cold and only fit for people her age. But she didn’t appear to mind the temperature as she waded out to her knees to scan the water for shells.
The Fourth of July would have gone by unnoticed by him, a barely perceptible blip among a series of daily upheavals and minor, and not so minor, readjustments. But Harriet had called it to his attention. He should have been suspicious when she first approached him, but he wasn’t. It wasn’t until she started talking about the beach and houses that he began to understand what she wanted. And he said no. But she followed him around with pictures of lovely houses on the waterfront. When those photos didn’t work, she tried guilt, pointing out how Mattie would love it and Mac looked like she could use a weekend away. He crumbled under her pressure when Mac told him that she had accepted the Roberts’ invitation. As he sat on the house’s upper deck, legs crossed at the ankles and propped up on the railing, he couldn’t help but feel glad that he gave in.
The screen door scraped open and he heard her step out onto the deck. She pulled the door closed behind her and walked over to the railing and into his line of sight. With her back to the water, she pushed her sunglasses back from her face and squinted at the sun. “It’s nice out here,” she said, stretching her legs out in front of her. “Where’d everyone go?”
“Mattie’s right there.” He pointed to the ocean. Angling her head, she followed the direction of his finger. “And Harriet and Bud took the boys for a walk on the beach.”
“Oh.” She nodded. She patted his ankle lightly and smiled at him. “Enjoying yourself there?”
“Can’t say that I mind this.” He crossed his hands behind his head and smiled back. “It feels good to relax a little. How are you feeling?” He nudged her hip with his foot.
She shrugged. “Better now.” She ran a hand over the back of her neck and glanced down the beach. “I guess everyone left while I was in the bathroom.”
“Harriet wanted to know if you wanted to go with them. She offered to wait, but I told her that your dinner made you nauseous.”
“Thanks for that.” She lifted herself onto the porch railing and swung her feet back and forth. The tips of her toes and side of her foot brushed against his leg. “Thank God they suggested this trip while I could still fit into all my clothes.” Her fingers pulled at a button on the shirt she was wearing.
He eyed her stomach, looking for signs of the baby but it was still flat. Rationally, he knew that it was still too early in her pregnancy for it to show, but he still found himself searching her body for some telltale sign.
“You can stare all you want, it’s not going to make the baby any bigger.” Her head was tilted back to the sun and her eyes were closed against its light.
“How did you know what I was doing?” He raised an eyebrow even though she wouldn’t see it.
“You do it every day.”
“I do?”
“Yes. It’s okay, you’re mostly subtle about it.” She leaned her head to the side and let the light catch her cheek.
“Mostly subtle?” He uncrossed and re-crossed his legs. A breeze off the water kept the air from getting too warm. The fishermen were packing up their rods and tackle boxes and the empty stretches of sand were beginning to fill in. By afternoon, the beach would be a patchwork quilt of blankets and umbrellas. Radios and childish shrieks would fill the air until the early morning silence was only a memory. “I thought I was being very stealthy.”
“You?” she questioned. Using his ankle for leverage, she edged off the railing. Her feet hit the deck with a light thump. “No, but I’ll let you keep your dreams.” She tried to slip past him, but his arm hooked around her waist and pulled her onto his lap.
“I’ll remind you that I was employed by the CIA.” He readjusted his legs so she fit comfortably on the chair.
“Oh, that’s right,” she laughed. “My mistake. You were very subtle and incredibly stealthy.”
“I knew you’d see it my way.” His fingers threaded through hers and then slid away as she stood up. Her hand lingered on his shoulder before she disappeared into the house, the sound of the screen door marking her exit. A gull squawked in the distance and he heard AJ call out to Mattie as the Roberts returned from their walk. And a thought, one that once been vague and indistinct, began to gather shape and form, and he started to wonder about all the possibilities.