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| Phoenix Chapter 7: Revelations |
| Wednesday. Lennie finally gets Jack to talk about the attack and the nightmares |
| Ed looked over at his partner digging through a pile of paperwork. //Might as well bring it up now, before we get called out again.// �Hey, Lennie. Got a minute?� Lennie looked up from the mountain of paperwork. The look on Ed�s face warned him that something unpleasant was coming. �Yeah?� �Look, I know Jack�s been through hell this past week. But he seemed OK at the game last night. And I need to get his statement about what happened so I can close out the file.� Lennie sighed. �You know, I was hoping that after yesterday evening, he�d be tired enough to make it through the night. But I swear, last night�s nightmare was worse than ever. But maybe talking about it will help him figure out why this is bothering him so much. Tell you what, Ed. How about you let me do this? He won�t open up with you around, but maybe if it�s just me we can kill two birds with one stone and he can finally put this behind him.� Ed nodded. �You got a point there. OK, tell you what. I can spend the rest of the afternoon running down that lead on the Johnson thing. I�ll tell the Lieu what you�re up to and that you won�t be back today.� Lennie nodded. �Thanks, Ed.� He sighed; this was not going to be easy, but it had to be done. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Jack sat at the kitchen table, a stack of folders in front of him. At the game last night, he had complained to Abbie that he was dying of boredom. So this morning, she had brought him a stack of briefs to review, and they planned to get together tomorrow to go over them. He figured he might as well use his brain while he was resting his body. He looked up when he heard the door. �Lennie! What are you doing home so early?� �Actually, Jack, I�m not off the clock. I�m here on police business.� Jack looked at him, confused. �Jack, I hate to do this to you, but we need your statement about what happened last Friday so we can close out the file. Ed put it off as long as he could, but . . .� The color drained from Jack�s face, and he swallowed, hard. Lennie came over to stand behind him, laid his hands lightly on his friend�s shoulders. �I know, Jack. But remember what you said Monday night? You need to get to the bottom of this, figure out what�s haunting you. And you�re not going to do that by keeping it all locked up inside. I asked Ed to let me handle this so we could face it together.� He slid his hands down over Jack�s chest, embracing him from behind, his chin leaning on Jack�s good shoulder. Jack sighed and laid his head against Lennie�s, brought his good hand up to squeeze the arm wrapped around him. �OK, Lennie. I�ll try.� �That�s all we can ask.� Lennie released him and held out his hand. Jack stood up and took it, following Lennie into the living room. Lennie took a small cassette recorder out of his pocket and placed it on the coffee table. He figured he would get too wrapped up in this to take accurate notes, anyway. �Don�t worry, Jack, that�s just for me. I�ll write this up later, and you can destroy the tape. OK?� Jack nodded and Lennie turned on the recorder. �OK, Jack, just tell me what happened last Friday.� Jack took a deep breath, let it out slowly, and began talking. �I was working on some stuff at home and realized I needed some files I had left at the office, so I went in to get them. I got there at about 4PM, the guard passed me through. Hey, how did he get past the guard?� �Killed him, Jack. One blow to the head. We found brass knuckles in his pocket.� Jack�s face fell. �Oh, shit. He looked so young . . .� Lennie reached out and squeezed Jack�s arm. He nodded and went on. �I headed up to my office, found the files, and settled down to wait for you.� Lennie nodded; they had planned to meet for dinner around 5. �It was really quiet, nobody around. So I was startled when about 15 minutes later I heard something in the hall. I thought it might have been you getting there early, so I got up and went to check. I was leaning out the door of my office when something hits me from the side and the next thing I know I�m on the floor of my office.� Jack licked his lips, swallowed, and continued. �He stood over me, taunting me for not recognizing him. It took a minute, but I finally put it together. Bobby Owens, a thug we put away about 5 years ago, would have gotten out recently. He said he blamed me for ruining his life, and that he was going to kill me, but not until after he hurt me. God, Lennie, you saw him. The man is a giant. He picked me up by the arm � that�s how it got dislocated � and just held me there while he yelled at me.� Jack was becoming visibly agitated; Lennie again reached out a comforting hand. �He tossed me around like a cat playing with a mouse, Lennie. Every time I�d land on the floor, those huge hands just came back at me for more. I was so scared of those hands, Lennie!� Jack took a shuddering breath and bit his lip, obviously trying very hard not to break down. The back of Lennie�s brain was sending off a warning bell � something Jack had said before about hands . . . //Hold that thought, Lennie boy, let�s get through this first // Lennie put his hands on Jack�s shoulders, squeezing gently. �Take it easy, Jack. It�s OK.� Lennie kept his voice calm, trying to give the other man strength, not sympathy. Jack took a few moments to calm himself, then nodded and began again. �He said that because it was a holiday, nobody would be coming to save me. He didn�t know you were coming, but I didn�t want to think how much more he could hurt me before you got there. I was so afraid you�d be the one to find my body.� He looked into Lennie�s eyes, then looked away, closing his own tightly against the tears. Finally, he looked up again. �At one point he tossed me out into the hall. Then the uniforms showed up and he put that knife to my throat. He held me like that for what felt like an hour till you showed up. I was so out of it at that point that I don�t think I even recognized you. I really don�t know what happened after that; the next thing I remember is being thrown down the hallway, and you holding me . . .� Lennie reached out and turned off the recorder, then gathered Jack into his arms just at he had that day. �It�s OK, Jack. It�s OK. He�s not going to hurt you anymore.� Jack leaned on Lennie�s broad chest, not quite crying, but trembling. Lennie ran his fingers through the thick silver hair, gently caressing Jack�s back and arms, waiting for the tremors to pass. Eventually, Jack took a deep breath and settled more comfortably into Lennie�s embrace. �Oh, god, Lennie.� Lennie kissed the top of his head. �I�m here, Jack. You�re safe.� They sat there like that for a while. //OK, now for the hard part. // �Jack, about the nightmares. Is it just this, or is there something else you�re not telling me?� �I don�t know, Lennie. I�m so scared when I wake up that I can�t remember anything.� Lennie held him in silence for a few minutes, then tried another approach. �Didn�t you mention earlier this week that you had a broken arm as a kid too? How did that happen?� Jack wondered where Lennie was going with this. �I fell down the stairs to our basement. I was about 14, I think. Couldn�t play basketball the rest of the season. Old man was really pissed at me.� �Yeah, you�ve mentioned that your dad had a temper. You said he hit your mom; you never said if he hit you . . .?� Lennie left it hanging as a question. �Yeah, sometimes. I was so afraid of those hands . . .� Jack shivered with the memory. �Jack, are you sure you just fell down the stairs?� �Of course I�m sure . . .� But the look on Jack�s face showed the doubt creeping in. �Jack, this wouldn�t be the first time I�ve seen an abused child confuse the lie with the truth. You were told to tell everybody you had fallen so that the truth wouldn�t get out. Eventually, you tell a lie often enough, you start believing it.� Jack pulled away, sitting up to look at Lennie in confusion. �How . . .?� �Jack, a couple of times this week I thought you were saying �No, Dad!� in your nightmares. Last night, I was sure that was what I heard. And then today, you mentioned Owens� hands. Owens reminded you of your father, that�s how he got so far under your skin. What happened here was too similar to what your father did when you were 14. You�ve been trying to remember what really happened. And maybe now that you have, the nightmares will go away.� Jack leaned forward, arm on his knee, head in his hand. He had expected some major release when he finally figured this out. But right now, all he felt was numb. //How did I not see this?// he wondered. //Because you�re too damned good at burying things you don�t want to deal with. Even obvious ones. // He felt Lennie�s hand gently rubbing his back. �Jack?� He sighed. �I�m OK, Lennie. Maybe too OK. It seems too simple.� �I think there�s at least one more part to it, Jack. Your subconscious has been digging up the old man. What would he think about us?� Jack looked at Lennie, stunned. �He�d kill me. No questions asked.� //Is that why I asked Lennie to leave after the nightmare Sunday? Was it the old man talking?// �I figured as much. Jack, he�s as dead as Owens. Neither one of them can ever hurt you again. Do you think you can get on with your life without them haunting you?� Jack saw the hope, the need in Lennie�s eyes. Suddenly all the pent up emotions came to a boil, the anger, the hurt, the pain, the love, all distilled into a white-hot passion. //YES!!! That bastard does NOT rule my life. I DO want this. I will never let him take Lennie away from me. // Jack spun around and kissed Lennie hard, crushing their lips together, his tongue probing deep into Lennie�s throat. Lennie wasn�t sure what had hit him, but he eagerly wrapped his arms around Jack and returned the kiss with his own growing passion. Jack eventually had to come up for air. He caressed Lennie�s face, looking deep into his eyes. �I want you, Lennie. I feel like I�m going to explode. I need you, now. God, I wish I could tear your clothes off! Damn this arm!� Jack�s voice had risen almost to a scream. He had to MOVE or explode, so he leaped up off the couch. Lennie saw the fire in Jack�s eyes, realized that this was the catharsis he needed. He got up and quickly shed his tie and shirt, then Jack�s. He pulled Jack to him for another crushing kiss, his hands sliding all over his lover�s back. This time when breathing forced them apart, both were trembling with the passion. Jack grabbed his wrist and started toward the bedroom . . . Back in the bedroom, Jack pulled him into another kiss, this time sliding his hand down Lennie�s back to cup his ass, pulling them so close he could feel the hardness answering his own. As Lennie�s arms tightened around him, he slid the hand around to the front and fumbled one-handed at Lennie�s zipper. Lennie broke off the kiss to free his hands to take care of the situation. Soon, both were completely nude; Jack all but pushed Lennie down onto the bed, throwing himself on top of him, tracing a line of brutal kisses down his neck. //Thank god for collared shirts and neckties, // Lennie thought, // that�s going to be one hell of a hickey// Jack was not normally into rough sex, but today something inside just burst. He hungered for Lennie in a way he had never felt before. �Oh, god, Lennie, I want you. I need you. I want to fuck you so bad . . . .� Lennie understood. He had been expecting this, not today, but expecting it nonetheless. �It�s OK, Jack. I�m ready. There�s a tube of lube and some latex gloves in the nightstand.� Jack sat up, straddling his lover. He looked at Lennie, confusion warring with lust in his eyes. �You�re ready? For this?� He was surprised, but his need pushed him on. �Lennie, I�m not sure I can be gentle today . . .� �That�s OK. I can take it. Whatever you need.� Their eyes met, and Jack saw the truth in them. Today, Lennie would do whatever Jack needed to put this all behind him. To once and forever eradicate the ghost of his father in this ultimate act of rebellion. Jack nodded, and got up to get the supplies. Lennie sat up and helped him slip on a latex glove, then spread a good amount of lube onto the fingers and onto Jack�s throbbing cock. // God, he�s so big, I hope I CAN take it . . . // He then bent over the edge of the bed, spread-eagled like a perp being frisked. He tried to force himself to be calm, to relax, but he was too excited and nervous, anticipating the new sensation. He gasped as Jack�s finger found its way into him. //Somehow, it never feels like this when the doctor does it!// he thought with a chuckle. �Ooh!� Jack had begun thrusting the finger, pushing deeper and deeper into him. Suddenly, there was another finger, stretching him. His breathing quickened, becoming ragged. �Oh, god, Jack.� "You OK, Lennie?� �Oh, yeah.� �Good, cause I don�t think I can wait much longer.� �Do it, Jack. Do it!!!� Suddenly the fingers were gone and something much larger was pressing up against him. He cried out as Jack gave one good push and buried the head of his cock inside Lennie�s ass. �Lennie, you OK?� Jack�s voice sounded ragged with his need to finish this. �Yeah. DO IT!� Jack didn�t need to be told twice. He began thrusting slowly but quickly building up to a frenzied pace. He rammed into Lennie like a piston, their balls slapping together loudly with each thrust. Lennie hovered on the line between pain and pleasure, with Jack filling him in a way he had never imagined. It didn�t take long before Jack gave out a strangled cry as his hot cum exploded deep inside his lover. The sensation pushed Lennie over the edge himself, his cum shooting up, covering his chest. They stood there for a moment, their breathing ragged, as each recovered his senses. Jack pulled out and sat down on the edge of the bed. Lennie straightened up, and sat down beside him, putting his arm around Jack�s shoulders. Jack leaned against him and sighed. �Did we really just do that?� Lennie smiled and squeezed. �Yeah, we did. Gimme your hand.� He pulled the latex glove off with a practiced snap, inside out, and tossed it into the trash can. // Who�d have thought THAT would be a useful job skill!// He got up, ducked into the bathroom, cleaned up his own mess and brought back a warm washcloth for Jack to clean up with. Jack was still just sitting there, kind of dazed. Lennie sat back down beside Jack, and gently drew him down so that they lay side by side, Jack�s head pillowed on his shoulder. He gently trailed his fingers over Jack�s arm. �You OK?� it was his turn to ask. Jack took a deep breath and turned to look at his lover. �Yeah. I think I�m finally all right now.� He rolled over so he could wrap his arm and leg over Lennie in a full body embrace. �Thanks, Lennie. I didn�t hurt you, did I?� Lennie wrapped his arm tighter around his lover. �A little more warm-up would have been nice, but we�ll have plenty of time for that next time.� �You�re sure?� �Yeah.� Jack sighed and buried his face in Lennie�s shoulder. Lennie�s fingers found their way into his hair. They just laid there for a little while, then Lennie spoke. �I love you, Jack. With all your ghosts and demons, your doubts, I love you more than I�ve ever loved anyone. I know you�re probably not ready for that yet, but I had to say it.� Jack�s fingers were tracing a random pattern on Lennie�s chest. He laid his hand over his lover�s heart. �I�m ready, Lennie. No more doubts. Wherever this takes us, I�m in for the long haul.� He looked up, into Lennie�s eyes. �I love you too.� A single tear rolled down Jack�s cheek; Lennie reached up and brushed it away, drawing Jack into the tenderest of kisses. Continue on to Chapter 8 Send me some feedback Back to the Story Index Disclaimer: These characters are owned by Dick Wolf and NBC. I'm just borrowing them for fun, not profit. |