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Yo Mama Jokes
Yo momma so stupid when you stand
next to her you hear the ocean!
Yo momma so stupid she hears it's chilly
outside so she gets a bowl.
Yo momma so stupid she got locked in a
grocery store and starved!
Yo momma so stupid she thinks Fleetwood
Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds!
Yo momma so stupid she sits on the TV,
and watches the couch!
Yo momma so stupid that she thought Boyz
II Men was a day care center.
Yo momma so stupid she bought a
videocamera to record cable tv shows at
home.
Yo momma so stupid when she went to take
the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice
instead.
Yo momma so stupid she jumped out the
window and went up.
Yo momma so stupid she thought a
quarterback was an income tax refund.
Yo momma so stupid she took a umbrella to
see Purple Rain.
Yo momma so stupid that under
"Education" on her job
apllication, she put "Hooked on
Phonics".
Yo momma so stupid she put out the
cigarette butt that was heating your
house.
Yo momma so stupid she put lipstick on
her forehead, talking about she was
trying to makeup her mind.
Yo momma so stupid she watches "The
Three Stooges" and takes notes.
Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly
contest, they said "Sorry, no
professionals".
Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window
and got arrested for mooning.
Yo momma so ugly just after she was born,
her mother said "What a
treasure!" and her father said
"Yes, let's go bury it".
Yo momma so ugly they push her face into
dough to make gorilla cookies.
Yo momma so ugly they didn't give her a
costume when she tried out for Star Wars.
Yo momma so ugly instead of putting the
bungee cord around her ankle, they put it
around her neck.
Yo momma so ugly she gets 364 extra days
to dress up for Halloween.
Yo momma so ugly when she walks into a
bank, they turn off the surveillence
cameras.
Yo momma so ugly her mom had to be drunk
to breast feed her.
Yo momma so ugly her mom had to tie a
steak around her neck to get the dogs to
play with her.
Yo momma so ugly when she walks down the
street in September, people say
"Damn, is it Halloween
already?"
Yo momma so ugly the government moved
Halloween to her birthday.
Yo momma so ugly that if ugly were bricks
she'd have her own projects.
Yo momma so ugly they pay her to put her
clothes on in strip joints.
Yo momma so ugly she made an onion cry.
Yo momma so ugly they filmed
"Gorillas in the Mist" in her
shower!
Yo momma so ugly when they took her to
the beautician it took 12 hours. . .for a
quote!
Yo momma so ugly they put her in dough
and made monster cookies!
Yo momma so ugly she tried to take a bath
the water jumped out!
Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window
and gets arrested!
Yo momma so ugly even Rice Krispies won't
talk to her!
Yo momma so ugly Ted Dansen wouldn't date
her!
Yo momma so ugly for Halloween she trick
or treats on the phone!
Yo momma so ugly she had to get her baby
drunk to breastfeed it!
Yo momma so ugly she turned Medusa to
stone!
Yo momma so ugly The NHL banned her for
life.
Yo momma so ugly people go as her for
Halloween.
Yo momma so ugly that when she sits in
the sand on the beach, cats try to bury
her.
Yo momma so ugly she scares the roaches
away.
Yo momma so ugly I heard that your dad
first met her at the pound.
Yo momma so ugly that your father takes
her to work with him so that he doesn't
have to kiss her goodbye.
Yo momma so old I told her to act her own
age, and the bitch died.
Yo momma so old she has Jesus beeper
number!
Yo momma so old her social security
number is 1!
Yo momma so old that when God said let
the be light, she hit the switch.
Yo momma so old that when she was in
school there was no history class.
Yo momma so old she owes Jesus 3 bucks!
Yo momma so old she's in Jesus's
yearbook!
Yo momma so old she has a picture of
Moses in her yearbook.
Yo momma so old her birth certificate
says expired on it.
Yo momma so old she knew Burger King
while he was still a prince.
Yo momma so old she owes Jesus a nickel.
Yo momma so old she was a waitress at the
Last Supper.
Yo momma so old she ran track with
dinosaurs.
Yo momma so old her birth certificate is
in Roman numerals.
Yo momma so old she sat behind Jesus in
the third grade.
Yo momma so old and stupid she knew the
Virgin Mary when she was 10 and said,
"Li'l Mary will never amount to
anything".
Yo momma so poor when I saw her kicking a
can down the street, I asked her what she
was doing, she said "Moving."
Yo momma so poor she can't afford to pay
attention!
Yo momma so poor when I ring the doorbell
I hear the toilet flush!
Yo momma so poor when she goes to KFC,
she has to lick other people's fingers!!!
Yo momma so poor when I ring the doorbell
she says,"DING!"
Yo momma so poor she went to McDonald's
and put a milkshake on layaway.
Yo momma so poor your family ate cereal
with a fork to save milk.
Yo momma so poor her face is on the front
of a foodstamp.
Yo momma so poor she was in K-Mart with a
box of Hefty bags. I said, "What ya
doin'?" She said, "Buying
luggage."
Yo momma so poor she drives a peanut.
Yo momma so poor she waves around a
popsicle stick and calls it air
conditioning.
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