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Maybe it was the funnel cake. Maybe it was the perogies. Or maybe people should just stop listening to me. But then, if they didn't, we wouldn't have one of the greatest stories ever! It all started back last summer.....(blurry screen, signifying a cheesy flashback)....My road trip tendencies were in full force, and that particular weekend, it was decided to make the trip to Knoebles, a secluded amusement park in Elysburg, PA. My grandparents own a cottage there, which comes in handy when I want to visit. On July 6th, me and some friends planned to spend the weekend there. The first day went off without a hitch. We all had a good time, and no one threw up. However, there is one particular ride there, "The Flyer", that I really enjoyed, and really wanted to go on. My friends were hesitant. Especially Becky Rishar........that's R.I.S.H.A.R........Rishar. Yes, everyone knows Becky...black hair, used to wear glasses, short.....you know the one. Well, anyway, Becky did not want to go on this ride, no matter what I said. Well, we argued for a few hours about it, until I gave her an option. She had to ride "The Flyer" or "The Satellite"......which was much worse. She chose "The Flyer", even though, in retrospect, she didn't really HAVE to go on either, but somehow, just by me saying she did, it was enough to make her think "Well, I GOTTA go on ONE of them, so I might as well decide." Anyway, she said she'd only go on the ride if I rode in her car and did the steering. Before I continue, perhaps I should describe the ride in detail. It consists of several carts, all hanging in suspension off the ground, connected to a center focal point which spins around, thus causing the carts to swing in a circular motion. It resembles a palm tree, if the leaves had little carts attatched to the ends of them. Each of these carts is equiped with a panel on the front. It is big and flat, and designed to catch the wind in certain ways in order for you to steer the cart outward or inward. Yeah, it's a damn cool ride. Anyway, back to the story! So Becky decided to ride with me, because, for some reason, she thought I knew what I was doing and would be the person who wouldn't go crazy with the steering. Everyone knows that the right choice would've been riding with Eric.......his cart hardly moved. But what fun is that? So, the ride started off slow, like most rides do. But soon, it was in full swing. I was determined to show Becky (Rishar) what a great, fun ride it was, and that she should feel stupid about never wanting to ride it. So, logically, I went all out and steered that cart like never before. Up and down, left and right, back and forth, I was amazing. However, Becky didn't seem to think so. She just sat there, not saying anything, with her head out of the side of the cart. This, to me, was a sign she wasn't having a good time. So, I decided to make the ride even MORE exciting, by trying stunts that no man has ever attempted before. I think we scraped the tree line once or twice. Still, she just sat there, looking down at the ground far below us. That was the last straw! "Are you having fun or what?? Isn't this great!" She then turned to me and said, in a very fast voice, "Greg Keck, I just threw up." Then, she turned away and looked towards the ground again. Well, my first instinct was to laugh, which I did, quite a lot.....until it hurt, actually. Then, I felt bad for her......until she told me she threw up a second time, to which I laughed even harder. However, being the good friend I am, I decided it was best to stop the acrobatic act and fly straight. After the ride had come to a complete stop, Becky Rishar went to the bathroom to "compose herself". I stuck around the ride, curious to see just what would happen. Apparently, after someone becomes sick on a ride, they must cease operation. The operator guy came out with a bucket of soapy water and a sponge, to make our cart rideable once again. I stood there, watching him throw the entire bucket on the side of the cart, nicknamed "Becky's side." The operator then walked past me, and under his breath, I clearly heard him remark, "Man, that stuff just won't come off." I think that was about the time I laughed so hard, I cried. Until that time in my life, I didn't know comedy like that existed in the real world. But thanks to Becky, I found out genius humor wasn't just limited to t.v. shows and movies. Needless to say, Becky wasn't much fun after that ride. She was even hesitant about riding the kiddie train. Also, I don't think she's listened to a single word I've said to her since that day. Oh well, live and learn, right? |
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We went to Knoebles, a day of food and fun,
But there was one more ride before the day was done.
We got on board and it flew all around,
Next thing I knew, my lunch was on the ground.
At first, I could not stand it, I knew not what to do,
So I took a bite of time and said this to you:
"Greg Keck I just threw up, all over the place,
I had to use your shirt sleeve to wipe off my face."
Grandma's, grab your grandkids, parents, start to run,
The contents of my stomach have ruined all your fun.
Please don't be upset with me, try to sympathize,
I started to feel really bad as I heard their cries.
"Greg Keck I just threw up, all over the place,
I had to use your shirt sleeve to wipe off my face."
Well, the ride has ended, and I start to cough,
The guy with the bucket says "Man, this stuff just won't come off."
"Greg Keck I just threw up, all over the place,
I had to use your shirt sleeve to wipe off my face." |
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